For once in my Life

FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE
Author: Simba, simba.le.chat@wanadoo.fr
Series : TNG/DS9
Characters : Vic Fontaine, Data, Deanna Troy, Minuet.

– “Computer, load Las Vegas program !”
The door opened into a big room where there was a subdued lighting. On
one side, a welcoming bar where some customers were drinking cocktails.
On the wall, musicians were painted in a retro style. On the other side,
a stage with a piano, double bass, percussion and wind instruments. Spots
diffused lights of different colors. Between the bar and the still empty
stage at this hour, round tables surrounded by armchairs. On each of these
tables, there were little lamps, switched on. This place was convivial.
Though it was quiet, its atmosphere was warm, and induced to sit down
just for the pleasure.
It’s in this room that Data has just got into. He was in a smart
cabaret at Las Vegas, in 1962. He stopped there a few seconds, a little
surprised by this place which seemed unusual for him, looked around him
and finally, went to the bar.
A distinguished-looking man, dressed in a tuxedo, introduced himself to
him with a smile, and held out his hand :
“Hi, You’re Data, I suppose… I’m Vic Fontaine, and
I’m very happy to meet you” Data shook his hand : “Good
evening, Mister !”.
– “Everybody knows each other, around here, you know. It’s
like a huge family ! so, call me Vic !”
– “Yes, Mister……sorry !…Vic.”
– Vic smiled. “What can I do for you ?”
– “A birthday party will be organized in a few days, for one of
my friends. I would like to sing for this occasion. My problem is I do
not succeed in singing without making causing the hilarity of the audience.
I do not want to make it laugh ! I want to sing, quite simply ! It seems
you are a great singer. Could you learn me how to sing, please ?”.
Vic looked like surprised, nevertheless, he answered :
– “Of course……..yes ! What song have you chosen ?”
– “For once in my life”
– “Humm ! For once in my life ?” said Vic skeptically. “Why
not ? Frank Sinatra is always a good choice. Sing it to me ! I will listen
to you, and I’ll tell you what I think. And I promise I won’t
laugh at you. Come on stage and take the micro !”
Vic sat down a little further. “Music !” he ordered.
Data took the micro. Some musicians appeared on the stage as if they came
from nowhere, and the music started to play. Data sang. Vic understood
very quickly why Data seemed so funny to the others. He was like a comedian
parodying a famous singer. It was hardly easy for an android, like him,
to transmit his emotion. And Data wasn’t at ease. He was very stilted.
When he was moving, he had excessive and clumsy movements. Although he
sang in tune, he was incapable of showing feelings through his song. He
didn’t smile either. On the contrary, he remained impassive. Behind
his awkwardnesses, finally, he felt ridiculous. But Vic had promised not
to laugh. What’s more, he didn’t feel like laughing. When
the song was at last finished, Vic applauded politely, stood up and went
towards Data.
– “Good ! you sing in tune and in time. But, honestly, you are rigid
and as frozen as an icicle !
Stop gesticulating like this ! you‘re a singer and not a traffic
cop !”
Data, surprised : – “A traffic cop ?”
– “Sorry ?….. yes… a traffic policeman !”
– “I do not understand what…. ”
Vic, with a sudden movement : – “Forget it ! I try to make you understand
you don’t have to flap around, but to transmit feelings with words
and music.”
– “I am an android, I do not have emotions. So, how can I show them
?”
– “I know, I understand what you mean. Come on and sit down, I’ll
try to explain you. Imagine…., you can do that, no ? imagine there’s
somebody very close to you, in the public. When you’re singing,
you’re speaking to this person, and you’re telling her things
in particular, very pleasantly, very kindly. OK ! you’re an android,
but you know what to be kind-hearted means, no ? I do know you’re
kind-hearted. Show it ! Be relaxed and not so rigid in your movements
! try to be natural, try to be yourself ! Wait a minute, I’m going
to show you.”
Vic stood up and came on stage. With a snap of his fingers, the music
started. Vic sang splendidly “All the way” with emotion and
warmth. When he finished to sing, he rejoined Data, and, looking him straight
in the eye : “Tell me now you haven’t felt anything when I
was singing… tell me it !” Data gazed at him with surprise,
but didn’t answer. Vic sighed and smiled : “I thought so……..then,
now, pallie, it’s your turn !”
Data hesitated. Vic insisted : “Come on…start again, and do
as I told you ! Sing with your heart !
Data sang again ; this time he didn’t dare move too much, and try
with difficulty to show feelings. It wasn’t perfect yet, but it
was better. Vic stopped him : “Don’t forget to smile when
you sing something cheerful !”
Data smiled, but with a forced smile.
– “No Data, don’t make a face ! smile ! think to something
happy !”
Data smiled. It wasn’t a natural smile but a kind of smile which
was all right.
– “Yes, it’s better, but you still have work to do…”
Once the sing was finished, Vic went towards Data and gave him a friendly
pat on the shoulder.
– “We stop for this evening. We’ll start working again, tomorrow,
okay ? let’s go for a drink.
Vic took Data to the bar and poured champagne in two glasses.
-“For you, to sing is easy, said Data. But, I am not at my ease
on stage. I feel I am a puppet. I am made to consider scientific and logical
facts.”
– “I know. To become an artist isn’t easy. Believe me, for
a human, it’s not simple too ! A lot of work and perserverance is
necessary.”
-“But, you are not a human being, Vic. You are a hologram, you are
reproduced and programmed by a computer.”
– “I’m totally aware of it. Never mind ! The main thing is
not to know who has created you, and even how, but to know what you can
do for the others, and to show humaneness.”.
– “You are not a real human being, and yet you are human. You understand
the others, while I live with human beings, I try to understand their
attitude, their reaction, their way of living because my wish is to become
like them. I study Earth literature, the violin, the painting. I play
classical theatre. My friends often say I perfectly reproduce a work,
but I miss what is called the soul.”
– “I see. You know, to have a soul means to express a feeling and
to transmit it. Don’t worry, baby. Your party is within a few days.
We’ll try to find this soul and to make it bubble up.”
– “Do you really think it is possible ? I would like to surprise
my friend.”
– “Trust Vic Fontaine !” answered Vic, winking at him. “
Hey ! tonight, I give a show. Stay here, you’re my guest.”
– “I thank you, but I must leave now. Good evening, Vic. See you
tomorrow.”
– “Bye !”
Data went away. Customers started to get in the cabaret. Vic watched Data
leaving the room and thought “Data, you old devil !”
***************
The day after, Data came in, dressed in a tuxedo. Vic welcomed him friendly.
– “Hello, Data, you’re splendid !”
– “I thought this tuxedo could logically be important to make a
good impression on the public.”
– “You’re right ! you’re making progress, you know.
Tonight, I suggest we sing together. We each sing a stanza. I start !
be careful my dear Data, you have a public ! hit it !”
They started to sing, but Data wasn’t very at ease, and wasn’t
used to be in front of a public. So, he copied Vic’s attitude and
his way of singing. After a while, Vic exasperated, stopped the music,
and the public disappeared.
– “No, no, and no Data ! don’t imitate me ! I don’t
need another Vic Fontaine ! if you do that, the show will be a flop !
I would like to be in sole command ! Don’t fake anyone… you
make parody ! once more, be yourself ! it’s you who sing and anyone
else !”
– “I have stored in my memory examples of singers…..”
– “So, forget them !…. We start again.” He sighed.
The public appeared and the music started to play.
Data, a little embarrassed at first, wasn’t unruffled. He showed
goodwill under the observant eye of Vic. Nobody laughed. On the contrary,
there was a loud applause. Vic, finally, was proud of his new pupil.
At the end of the show, Vic congratulated Data for his incontestable progress.
– “You see, it’s not so difficult ! You must believe in you
!”
– “Really ?” asked Data with a doubt in his voice.
– “Yes ! Ha ! Ha ! you’re incredible, but you’re a nice
chap !”
– Data looked at Vic with a litlle surprise, then asked : “May I
ask you something ?”
– “Yes..”
– “Do you mind if this party takes place here ? I would like to
invite you… and could you accompany me on the piano while I will
sing ?”
– “Of course, my friend. I’ll be very pleased. And thank you
for your invitation. It’s very kind of you. I’ll take care
personally of the organization of your reception. But you must continue
your rehearsals. I want you to come here every night until this party
!”
During the following days, Vic made Data sing and gave him a lot of advice.
Data performed in the cabaret with a great pleasure. It sounds like he
enjoyed himself as he had never done before.
***************
On an evening, while Vic was doing his accounts in his suite not very
far from the cabaret, someone knocked at the door. He stood up and went
to open the door. A young lady introduced herself :
– “Hello ! I’m Deanna Troy, counselor on the Enterprise.”
– “Hello, doll-face, I’ve ever heard of you. Come on ! may
I help you ?” Deanna got in, and they sat down.”
– “I need to speak with you. It’s about Data.” said
Deanna.
– “What’s wrong with him ?”
– “Nothing…, nothing serious ! but I know he asked you something
particular.”
– “Did he tell you about it ?”
– “No, but we’ve seen him coming here these last few days.
And it’s my job to study the social psychology. Data is a little
different, lately. Why does he come here ?”
– “Should I answer you ?”
– “No, of course…., but I’m a little worried about him”
– “Well.. He said me he wanted how to sing to the birthday of a
friend. Why ? Is it so strange ?” asked Vic surprised
– “A friend ? no, of course, it’s not strange. What will he
sing ?”
– “For once of my life”
– “And nothing has surprised you in his request ? ”
– “No…….or perhaps, after all. You know, I don’t
meddle in other people’s affairs. He asked me to help him, what I tried
to do, as a friend. He’s happy, and me too. It’s simple !”
– “I understand. You’re very nice. You’ve helped him.
He was anxious, and now he feels better.”
– “Why ? What’s his problem ?”
Deanna smiles : – “He’s in love !”
– “Really ? But I believed an androide could not have such feelings
?”
– “It is true. But a few times ago, he found in the main memory of
the Enterprise the hologram of Minuet. An artificial person created by
the Bynars people. This program is able to have almost identical feelings
to those of human ones. From day to day, this young woman, Minuet, seems
to have recognition towards Data to have released her from the memory,
and becomes attached more and more to him. Curiously, he is touched by
that. It seems she’s able to retransmit to him what he feels…
As he never had this kind of emotions, he tries to understand what happens
to him ! Then, our Data probably sought a way of saying her what he supposes
to feel. So he had the idea to organize this party between colleagues,
with her, supposedly for the birthday of a friend, and the song must to
be this means, I think. ”
– “I had to contribute to develop feelings in him…… Is it a problem
to him, I mean, from a functional point of view ? ”
– “Not in theory, no ! But you know, we know him for a long time,
and all that is rather unusual for us, as for him. If that makes him happy,
it is a great chance. In any case, as you often see him, if you notice
something strange, please tell me it at once ”
– “OK, don’t worry. Everything will be all right. ”
– “Of course, don’t tell him that I came to see you. All that
must remain between you and me. Can I count on you?”
– “I promise you. goodbye ”
– “Thank you, goodbye”.
***************
The evening of the party arrived. A large table was set in the middle
of the room, ready to accommodate about ten people. A beautiful earthenware
crockery, silver cutlery and beautiful glasses were laid out. A superb
crystal gloss had been installed for the occasion. A background music
gave a festive atmosphere.
The guests arrived. Vic received them as was proper, with style………
Data then introduced her friend Minuet to Vic, and before the dinner,
everyone was invited to have a glass of champagne.
Data, suddenly, went towards Vic :
– “Vic, I have to confess to you something. I talked to you about
a friend. In fact, it was about Minuet……… ”
Vic looked at him, and smiling :
– “I understand Data…… when a man sings a love song, It’s
usually for a woman, no ? … You are a secretive thing, you know!

– “I hope you are not angry with me about I did not tell you the
truth ”
– “No ! On the contrary, we all have our secrets…….. Come
on ! It’s your turn now, if you’re ready to impress the crowd
! ”
Vic sat down at the piano, and started to play. Data took the micro and
started to sing For once in my life. He never had sung it so well. He
was very applauded by everyone.
The party was a success and finished very late in the night.
***************
The following day, Data returned to see Vic.
– “Hi, Data ! And this evening ? “everything went well as you
wanted ?
– “Yes. I think that everyone was agreeably surprised by my performance……..but
the most important thing, it is the pleasure I have made to Minuet. She
was very happy, she even asked me to teach her this song !”
– “I’m sure that you will be an excellent professor.”

– “Not as good as you……… I want to thank you for all and especially
for your patience towards the androide which I am.”
– “Anytime, Pallie… come and see me whenever you want. My club
is always open to you. Say hello to Minuet from me and I wish you to be
happy.”
They shook hands, and Data left the cabaret.
***************
A new public appeared, some musicians made their entrance, Vic came on
stage and started to sing. >

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Union of Treks V: Interdimensions

Union of Treks V: Interdimensions
Author: Silk, Silk@magpies.net

Commander Benjamin Sisko was pacing as he entered the day’s station log aboard Deep Space Nine.
Station Log,” he begun, “I am speaking in this peculiar and unique tone so as that I will not be confused with Captain Kirk or Captain Picard;   if the fact that I’m a six foot four African-American isn’t enough to differentiate me from those would-be heroes of future past then there’s definite problems here.
We are awaiting the arrival of the U.S.S. Enterprise, which is to undergo three months of intensive overhaul and redesign.”
The lift doors opened and Odo came rushing out to meet Sisko.   Unnoticed, a Starfleet security officer in his mid-twenties and with an affable, immediately likeable smile and face followed him.
“Benson!” Odo exclaimed pompously, “the governor expects that all will be in readiness for the arrival of the Enterprise.”
Sisko looked at him.   “What did you just call me, Constable?”
Odo was taken aback.   He glanced around, mystified.   “I’m sorry,” he said finally.   “I thought I was elsewhere.”
Major Kira also came rushing out, completely indignant and carrying a memo in her hand.   “Have you seen this?” she wailed.
“And what would that be, Major?” Sisko asked serenely.
“After years of contributing to the resistance against the Cardassians, they’re rating me only Number Four of the Bajorans who wear tight bodysuits!” Kira was ready to explode.   “I deserve better!”
Sisko prepared his unique voice.    “I’m sure many thirteen year olds appreciate you, Major,” he said, “but bodysuits are not the issue here.”
“And then what exactly is?”
“Tight bodysuits.”
“There’s also a communiqué   here, Commander,” Kira went on.
“From who?”
“Paramount – contract stipulations request that we use the terms structural integrity, system-wide failure and hull breach at least three times in the course of this story.”
“We’ll see what we can do,” Sisko said.   Then he noticed the officer that had followed Odo onto Ops.   “And who would this be, Constable?”
“This is Starfleet’s new Chief of security aboard the station,” Odo told them.   “He was just assigned.”
“Lt. Commander Simon O’Neil at your service, sir!” O’Neil snapped to stiff attention.
“Welcome to DS9, Lieutenant,” Sisko said.
“Thank you, sir.”
“You look quite young to have become a security chief so soon.”
O’Neil flashed a likeable grin because he was a likeable fellow with a likeable face.   “I used to be an engineer aboard the U.S.S. Enchanted, but when I got married five years ago and had four kids I decided I needed a more stable environment.”
“A security officer with a family?” Kira asked.   “It’s a dangerous lifestyle.”
“It’s really just a sideline,” O’Neil said.   “I’m actually qualified as a warp-astrophysicist.   In fact, I estimate I’m only a day, at most, from developing a new warp drive that will improve current warp capacity by five thousand per cent.”
“Impressive,” Sisko said.
“I’m also working on new shields which will be impenetrable to phaser, photon or disruptor fire.”
“Incredible,” Kira said.
“And I’ve been able to study Dr.    Noonian Soongh’s work and I have a whole line of androids just ready to be produced,” O’Neil went on endearingly, because he really was a likeable fellow.   “Fifty of them, but each one uniquely different.”
“Fantastic,” Odo said.
“And good news for you, too, Constable Odo,” O’Neil continued.   “I think I may have been able to locate your homeworld.   Just think of it;   in a day or so you can meet a whole world of your kind.”
Odo looked hopeful.
“Of course, it’ll take just a day or more so for my new style sensory array to perfectly isolate your homeworld, but I’m confident.”
“You certainly are an impressive young man, Lt. O’Neil, with some potentially impressive discoveries,” Sisko said.
“Well, everything should be completed within a day or so,” O’Neil went on, “and then it’s goodbye security and hello to my wife and four children – six, actually, since she’s expecting twins any day now.”
Sisko, Odo and Kira stared wordlessly at this likeable fellow.   Their reverie was interrupted by O’Brien.
“Commander, I’m reading some bloody unusual scans!” O’Brien said.
“Report,” Sisko ordered.
“We’re scanning temporal-electro-magentic-tachyon-smachyon-pulse- ion-flyin-scriptwriterdelusional disruptions.”
“Where?”
“Bloody all around us.”
The wormhole opened up and spewed out the Enterprise.
“It’s the bloody Enterprise, sir,” O’Brien said.
“Patch me in,” Sisko ordered.
In a moment Picard appeared on the screen.   “DS9, U.S.S. Enterprise requesting permission to dock,” he said.
Sisko gritted his teeth just to prove he had a grudge against Picard.   Picard looked stoic, just to prove he knew Sisko had a grudge against him and knew that Sisko knew that he knew all about it.
“Permission granted,” The viewer flickered off.   “Chief, any further reports on those spatial disturbances?”
“They’re continuing to expand at a bloody alarming rate.”
“Define alarming, Chief.”
“You know how things go bloody wrong on these shows?”
“Yes.”
“Well it’s bloody worse this time.”
Sisko became alarmed by that.   Things were definitely going awry – problems, O’Brien getting more than a line.   What would come next?
His answer came almost immediately.
“Commander!” Dax shouted out.   “There’s something else…it’s coming out of the wormhole!”
“What?” Sisko asked.   “On screen.”
A huge spinning space station emerged out of the wormhole.
“My God-!” Bashir exclaimed, who’d just arrived so he could utter those words.
“Patch me through,” Sisko said.
“Aye, sir,” Dax obliged.   “We have the alien station.”
“This is Commander Benjamin Sisko of Deep Space Nine, please identify yourself-”
A grim face, ready however to crack a smile at any moment, appeared on screen.   “Hello, Commander Sisko,” the stranger said.   “I’m Commander Sinclair.   Welcome to Babylon 501.” He smiled.

*

Sisko, Kira, Picard, Riker and Worf, Sinclair and his chief of security, Garibaldi, were in Sisko’s ready-room.   Spock was also there, sitting serenely in one corner.
“Who are you?” Picard frowned.   “Where do you come from?”
Sinclair looked decidedly grim.   “It was the Dawn of the Third Age of Man, ten years since the Earth Minbarri war,” he began.   “The Babylon project-”
“Can you summarize?” Sisko asked.
“We’re from Earth,” Sinclair told them.
“Impossible,” Riker said.   “We’re from Earth.   We’ve never heard of you;   we’ve never seen that station.   How did you get here?”
“There was a rupture in the space-time continuum,” Sinclair said.   “Before we could even consider avoiding it, it swallowed us.   The next thing we knew, we were coming out of that thing you call a slughole.”
“Wormhole,” Kira corrected him.
Sisko’s combadge signaled.   “Yes?” he answered.
“Commander, a telephone box has just materialized in the middle of the promenade,” Odo reported.   “Some idiot in a scarf and overcoat has just come out of it.   I’ve apprehended him.   What should I do with him?”
“Did he give you his name, Odo?” Sisko asked.
“Who.”
“The idiot that came out of the telephone.   What’s his name?”
“His name isn’t What, Commander, it’s Who, Doctor Who.”
“That’s-”
Spock rose.   “Spare me the illogical Abbott &   Costello routines,” he said.   “I believe I may have the solution to our dilemma.”
“What, Mr. Spock?” Sisko asked.
“On a previous mission, Commander Sisko, a Romulan vessel of incredible technology detonated while in Warp,” Spock began, “which caused a powerful interdimensional-temporal disruption – something Starfleet theorists have named the Perplexus Cloud.   When we arrived to investigate at Geldar IV – the planet in whose orbit this phenomena occurred – the Perplexus had disappeared.   Or so we thought.    Perhaps it had not.”
“You don’t mean-” Riker began in astonishment.
“Yes.   It may be moving throughout the galaxy, like some sort of sentient entity.”
“Oh.” Riker was disappointed.   “I thought you were going to say it hid from us.”
Spock arched a brow.   “Quite possibly, the Perplexus interacted with the Wormhole, which is a phenomena in itself.   That may have effected another change in the Perplexus.”
“It’s caused a rip in all the dimensions and is merging them,” Picard said.
“Yes.   Yourselves and Commander Sinclair each come from Earth, but from Earth in different dimensions.   Those dimensions are now beginning to coalesce.”
“And Doctor Who?”
“His dimension is merging also with your two,” Spock went on.   “Perhaps an infinite amount of dimensions will merge.    Perhaps no dimension is safe at all.”
“What can we do to stop it?” Riker asked.
“We must monitor the phenomena if we are to reverse the effect,” Spock said.
Sisko’s combadge signaled again.   “Yes?” he snapped.
“Commander, another ship has just come through the wormhole.” It was Dax reporting.
“Identification?”
“It’s the SeaQuest!” Dax told him.
“The SeaQuest is a deep sea vehicle, not a deep space one,” Picard scoffed.   “That’s absurd.”
“Not if you saw their second season storylines, Captain,” Riker said.
“Good point,” Picard conceded.
“I suggest we launch a probe into the Wormhole,” Spock said.
Sisko nodded.   “Let’s get back to Ops,” he said.
They followed him out.

*

Everybody was on Ops.
“Hello, I’m Captain Picard.”
“Captain Bridger,” Bridger introduced himself.   “This is Commander Ford.”
“Captain Bridger, Commander Ford,” Picard greeted him.
“Captain Picard.”
“This is Commander Sisko.”
“I can speak for myself, Captain,” Sisko said stiffly.   “Captain Bridger, Commander Ford.”
“Commander Sisko,” Bridger said.
“Commander Sisko, Captain Picard,” Ford acknowledged.
“And I’m Commander Sinclair,” Sinclair said suavely.   “And this is my second in command, Lt. Ivanova.”
“Lt. Ivanova,” Picard said.
“Captain Picard,” Ivanova replied, “Commander Sisko, Captain Bridger, Commander Ford.”
“Commander Sinclair, Lieutenant Ivanova,” Sisko said.
“Commander Sinclair, Lieutenant Ivanova-” Bridger began.”
“Gentlemen, I suggest we dispense with the formalities and launch our probes at the wormhole,” Spock said, cutting through the introductions, “as agreed before we all convened to Ops.   Vital time is wasting.”
“Of course,” Picard said.
“Launch probes,” Sisko ordered.
“Launching the bloody probe,” O’Brien complied.
SeaQuest reports they are launching the Whskr, Captain,” Ford said.
The probe and one of SeaQuest’s Whskrs span merrily into the Wormhole.   Then the Wormhole closed up, leaving the assortment of crews to stare about at nothing.
“Well?” Kira said.   “What now?”
“As a precautionary measure,” Picard said, “I suggest we move everybody aboard DS9.”
“Captain!” Sisko hissed.   “I am in charge of DS9.   I give the orders.”
“I’m sorry.   I didn’t mean to overstep my bounds, Commander.”
“Just remember who’s in charge next time.” Sisko’s combadge signaled again.
“Commander Sisko, I’ve just found two horribly mutilated bodies in docking bay 1,” Odo reported.
“Mutilated?”
“Yes.   However, the mutilations seemed to have been caused with surgical precision,” Odo stated.
“Bashir here, Commander,” the doctor’s voice cut into the combadge signal.   “The bodies have been mutilated, but the wounds have all been cauterized.   Whoever did this used some sort of laser technique.”
“It could be something from another dimension,” Picard said.
“Fascinating,” Spock said.   “The dimensions continue to merge.”
“Commander,” Dax said, “Starfleet scout vessel approaching, requesting docking clearance.   It has a grade 1 priority.”
“Approved,” Sisko said.
“Commander, what should I do?” Odo’s voice sounded from the combadge.
Sisko was at a loss.   There was too many decisions.   He looked at his fellow leaders – Captain Picard, Captain Bridger, Commander Sinclair and even Spock, for that matter.
“Commander,” Bashir spoke up, “I’ve just had reports of more deaths – same cause, surgical mutilation.”
Another combadge signal.   “Commander, I’ve found some more corpses – mutilated as well.” It was O’Neil.   “But not with surgical precision.   I witnessed some sort of large reptillian-like alien scurry off at an alarming rate.”
“The corpses are dissimilar?” Sisko asked.
“Yes.”
“Could it be that there are two separate murdering entities aboard the station?” Data asked.
“That’s possible,” Riker conceded.
“Or at least somebody wants to make it look that way,” Picard pointed out.
“Perhaps we should assemble our security teams, Captain Picard, Captain Bridger, Commander Sinclair,” Sisko suggested.
“An excellent suggestion,” Picard agreed.
They started to get to work.

*

Chief O’Neil greeted the Starfleet scout vessel when it docked.    The doors opened and out came Dr.    McCoy.   “Dr.    Leonard McCoy,” he introduced himself.
“Welcome to DS9, Doctor,” O’Neil greeted him.   “I’m Chief O’Neil, head of Starfleet Security aboard this Station.”
McCoy nodded at him.   “What’s going on out there?   Looks like a damned fireworks parade!”
“I think it would be better if you discussed that with Commander Sisko and Captain Picard.”
“Of course.   Lead the way.”
They started down the corridor.

*

Picard, Sisko, Bridger and Sinclair were left on Ops.   Spock was studying the sensory array.
“More deaths have been reported,” Sisko said, “but as of yet, no sign of the assailant – not from any of our security teams.”
“How can we stop something we can’t see?” Picard asked.
Suddenly, the viewer exploded with an incandescence of kaleidoscopic fire.   It was the wormhole, but not as it had been before.   The four senior officers had to shield their eyes from the conflagration.
“What’s happening?!” Sisko cried out.
“Fascinating,” Spock said.   “I’m getting unusual readings – completely unalike that of the Wormhole.   I believe what we’re scanning is the Perplexus.   And yet-”
“Yet what, Mister Spock?” Picard asked.
“Some great form of energy is closing in on us,” Spock reported.   “It’s distance, still, is immense, but it is closing in from all around.   From everywhere!”
“Is it the Perplexus?” Picard asked.
“No!” Spock answered.   “The Perplexus is remaining stationery.   Something behind that.   Some great force.   Something beyond our comprehension.   Energy readings off the scale.   I estimate four hours before complete implosion completely erases existence as we know it.”
“But what?   What is it?” Sisko demanded to know.
There was a flash of white light on Ops and Q appeared.    “Well, you fools?” he asked irritably.   “Don’t you know?”
“Know what?” Picard asked.
“The Universe is coming to an end!”

*

Just about everybody of importance was gathered in Sisko’s ready-room.   “What are you talking about, Q?” he demanded.
“The Universe!   The big-bang theory, haven’t you heard of it?” Q asked.   “The Universe began as an infinitesimally small pinpoint;   then it exploded and has been expanding ever since.   Well, due to the Perplexus, the Universe has reached its limit.    Now its imploding.   Returning back to that one small point.”
“The Perplexus caused it?” Picard asked.
“Yes.   It was the catalyst.”
“But you’re alarmed.   You want to stop it from happening, don’t you?” Picard realized.
Q said nothing.
“But you can’t.   Why?”
“Logic would dictate that the Q continuum exist in one of these parallel dimensions,” Spock surmised.   “But now that every dimension is merging, their powers are being limited, are conforming to the physical laws of our dimension.”
“Is that all logic would dictate, Spock?” McCoy said gruffly.
“Logic would have the Q Continuum helpless in this situation,” Spock said, “so as that we must summon the help of one other person.”
“Not again!” Picard complained.
“Yes.   We require the assistance of Admiral James T. Kirk.   Only he can save us from the Perplexus.”
“But how?” LaForge asked.   “If Q, with all his power, can’t stop the Perplexus, how can Admiral Kirk, without any power at all?   In fact how can Admiral Kirk help at all when he’s dead?”
“Logic would suggest-”
“Logic!” McCoy exploded.   “The man’s talking about logic!    Spock, we’re talking about plot-holes in the story!”
“All will be revealed in time, Doctor McCoy.”
“I could use my powers to bring Kirk back to life,” Q said.
“There, you see, Doctor, logic has taken care of one problem.”
“But there’s the other,” Troi said.   “Where is Admiral Kirk?”
“It would stand to reason that since the exploding Romulan ship caused the Perplexus, Admiral Kirk would be in the Perplexus since he was on the Romulan ship,” Picard said.
“Exactly,” Spock said.
“Q, can you enter the Perplexus yourself?” Sisko asked.
“No.   It’s too great a power for even me.   My powers would not be able to manifest themselves in the Perplexus,” Q answered.    “Kirk will have to be brought to me aboard DS9.”
“Very well, then,” Picard said.   “Number One, get the Enterprise ready.   We’re about to enter the Perplexus.”
“Aye, Captain.”
“Captain,” Bridger broke in, “may I suggest a mixture of our crews?”
“Your experience is underwater, not in space, Captain Bridger,” Picard told him.
“Well our experience is in space,” Sinclair said.   “I might not have told you, but it was the Dawn of the Third Age of Man, ten-”
“Your experience isn’t in this genre,” Picard said.   He turned to Sisko.
“I’ll withhold all DS9 personnel but one, Captain,” Sisko said, “but you have to do me one favor.”
“Name it.”
“You’ve already killed my wife.   Try not to kill my son on your way back.”
“Certainly,” Picard agreed.   “And who’s this officer you’re asking me to take with us?”
“Our new security liaison, Chief O’Neil.   He’s a man of many talents.”
Picard looked at him, trying to determine whether Sisko was trying to get him back for inadvertently killing his wife.
“He’s is an exemplary officer, Captain Picard.”
“Very well,” Picard said.   “Have him join us.”
“Well I still protest, Captain Picard!” Bridger raved.   “You need all the help you can get!   I insist upon a small detachment of my crew accompanying you.”
“Very well,” Picard grumbled.   “Three people, but no more.”
“That’s all I ask,” Bridger nodded.

*

The Enterprise was ready to take flight.   The senior crew had assumed their positions.
“At Warp 1, Captain,” Data said, “it will take us three minutes to penetrate the Perplexus Cloud.”
“Make it so, Commander.”
The Enterprise leaped to Warp 1.
Picard was smiling.
“Is something amusing, Captain?” Riker asked.
“Have you ever noticed how something goes wrong whenever we’re on our way somewhere?” Picard asked.
“Of course.   It’s habitual.”
“Well, what could go wrong in three minutes?”
The Enterprise ground to a halt ninety seconds into the trip.
“What’s happened?” Picard demanded.
“Captain,” Data said, “all equipment failing to respond to manual control.”
“What’s causing it, Data?” Riker asked.
“Uncertain, sir.”
“Captain, may I direct your attention to the viewer?”
The Perplexus was pulsing with regular flares of orange light, each resulting in the cloud itself growing brighter.
“I believe those pulses indicate the merging of each dimension,” Spock said.   “Quite possibly, one of those may have affected shipwide operations.”
Troi was grasping her temples.   “It’s horrible, Captain!” she cried.
“What, Counselor?   What?”
“The sensations I’m receiving.   Great spirits, emotions, infinite emotions, ecstasy, bewilderment, empathy, horror!”
“At what?   What’s causing those emotions?”
“No doubt the merging of each dimension,” Spock said.
“But what’s so horrible about each dimension merging?” McCoy asked.
“Think of some of those merging,” Spock suggested.
“He’s right!” Troi screamed.   “Ecstasy over the Star Wars trilogy, woes over Battlestar Galactica, suicidal masses over Howard the Duck, delight at E.T… Everything’s merging!” Then she fell unconscious.
“Medical to the Bridge!” Picard ordered.   “Commander LaForge, Commander Data, Level 2 Diagnostics on all shipwide systems.”
“Level 2 Diagnostics inoperative,” Data reported.
“Then Level 1 Diagnostics on the Level 2 Diagnostics that aren’t working,” Picard said.   “And when you’ve got them working, then I want shipwide Diagnostics.   Understood?”
“Aye, sir.”
“Then make it so.”

*

Sinclair was talking to Kira in Quark’s.
“You see, in our dimension, these are strained times,” Sinclair was explaining.   “When we built Babylon 1, how were we to know it would explode?   So then we built Babylon 2.    That station jumped into hyperspace and disappeared.   So then we built Babylon 3.   That one jumped into hyperspace and then exploded.   So we built Babylon 4.   That one jumped into hyperspace, disappeared, reappeared in the wrong spot and then exploded…”
Kira felt she was going to be in for a long conversation.
But she didn’t mind.   She was starting to feel strange and the strangeness accounted for the fact that the Commander’s voice was beginning to enchant her.

*

Sisko’s ready-room chime signaled.   He wasn’t feel too well.
“Enter,” he commanded from where he sat behind his desk.
Dax came in.   “The dimensional crossovers are occurring at an alarming rate, Ben,” she told him.
“Oh?”
“We have crews from Space 1999 on the Promenade, chimps from 2001 in Keiko O’Brien’s school classes, six teenagers from who knows where in Quark’s, a Stargate in Cargo Bay #1, people from a planet they call Zeist lopping off each other’s heads-”
“Do you have a point?”
“Two of the crossovers – human – insist on seeing you.”
Sisko sighed.   “Send them in.”
Dax ushered two people into the ready-room.   One was a tall, handsome man, dressed in a nice suit and about thirty.   The other was a younger lady, pretty, with fiery red hair.    Both wore overcoats, and presently, they each removed their identification from their pockets and flashed their badges.
“Commander,” the man said, “I’m Special Agent Mulder, this is Special Agent Scully, we’re here to ask you about a number of unusual sightings we’ve received.”

*

Lenier, the aide to the Minbarri Ambassador Delenn, was happily walking about the promenade, taking in all the new sights and delighting in the vast cultural diversities.   That was when he bumped directly into the woman, almost knocking her over.
They steadied each other, murmured their apologies, and then looked at each other.   Lenier identified the woman as one of the dimensional crossovers from the SeaQuest.
“Hello,” he said pleasantly, “I’m Lenier.”
She smiled.   “I’m Doctor Smith-”
Lenier was horrified.   “Doctor Smith?” he asked.   “Doctor Smith?” he repeated with escalating anxiety.   “Doctor Smith!!?!!” he screamed in terror.   Continuing to scream and flail his arms about hysterically, he bolted from the promenade.
“What did I say?” Dr.    Smith asked nobody in particular.

*

E.T.    waddled about the promenade, virtually unnoticed despite – or perhaps because of – the vast assortment of genres and dimensions.   He held one hand aloft, finger pointed upward, repeating over and over, “Phone home, phone home.”
That was when he saw the phone booth.
Smiling inwardly, E.T.    made for the phone, sliding open the door and reaching for the receiver.
That was when Doctor Who saw him.   “Hey, get away from that, you little turnip!” Who screamed.   He charged E.T., jumping him and dragging him to the ground.
The two tussled tremendously, rolling over and over atop of each other as they struggled for control of the battle.
“Phone home phone home,” E.T.    was saying gleefully.
“Home this!” Who roared, getting the better of E.T.    and starting to pound his face repeatedly with clenched fists.
“Leave him alone!” Delenn, who had just appeared, ordered.
Doctor Who looked at her speculatively.
“No!” J’Karr arrived also.   “I think the Doctor has a good case for pounding the little creature.”
“This is not your concern, J’Karr,” Delenn said.
“Yes, it is.   There shall be no cuteness aboard this station.   Furthermore, there shall be no character wearing more latex than myself on this station.”
“You fool, J’Karr!”
J’Karr lifted a hand, as if to backhand her.   “You dare to call me a fool?”
Dagwood intervened and took hold of J’Karr’s offending wrist.   “You will not hit a woman,” he said slowly.
J’Karr hit him.   Dagwood barely stumbled.   Dagwood punched J’Karr in the face, which sent J’Karr flying into a group of innocent bystanders.
And that was when the riot started.

*

Unconcerned, an earlier conversation continued in Quark’s.
“Then there was Babylon 106,” Sinclair went on telling Kira.   “That one exploded, entered hyperspace, exploded some more, then reappeared and exploded again.   Of course, Babylon 107 suffered a much simpler fate.   That just jumped into hyperspace and disappeared.”
“Is that all?” Kira purred.   She felt funny.   “What happened to it?”
“We think it exploded,” Sinclair said.   “Now, which Babylon were we up to?”

*

Sisko arrived on Ops.   “Status?” he asked.
“Scanners are reading that the Enterprise has come to a full stop outside the Perplexus,” Dax reported.
“Outside the Perplexus?” Sisko was confused.   Her mission was to enter the Perplexus.   What were they waiting for?   “What’s her problem?”
“Indeterminable, sir,” Dax said.   “The Perplexus is screwing with all external station-wide sensory array.”
“Can we contact them?”
“No bloody way,” O’Brien answered.   “The Perplexus energy emissions have jammed communicator ability.”
“Damn,” Sisko said.   He wiped his brow.   He was sweating.
Bashir entered Ops.   “Commander, I’m afraid I have some bad news,” he said.   “We’ve contracted a virus aboard the station.”
“Not surprising,” Sisko said.   “What’re its effects?”
“Uncertain.   It could affect everybody differently.    It’s the nature of the virus to adopt a new strain depending on how one’s body combats it.   It could cause aggression, ecstasy, depression, delight – anything.   At the moment though, it’s causing mass riots on the promenade.   Odo and Babylon 501‘s security teams have just managed to quiet them down.”
“I’ll get to the bottom of this at once.”
Sisko left Ops with Bashir in tow.

*

Everybody, from all dimensions, had been formed in a huge circle on the promenade.   Odo paced in the center of the circle, sternly admonishing the participants involved in the riot.
“Now this is not a battleground,” Odo was saying.   “Next time such an angry outbreak occurs, I will have you all confined to general quarters!”
The crowd suddenly parted and Sisko joined Odo.   “You’ve managed to stop it?” Sisko asked.
“I think so,” Odo said.
Sisko looked at the crowd.
Mulder and Scully edged their way up to the front of the circle to get a better look.   “I don’t care what you say, Mulder, but-” Scully was whispering.
“Oh, come on, don’t be a fool, Scully,” Mulder cut her off, but just as quietly.   “You have to believe now.”
“But there’s no evidence.”
“Have a look around you!”
“It’s a mass hallucination.   It has to be.   I feel sick.   You said you felt somewhat sick.   What other explanation can there be?”
Mulder shook his head in disbelief and stared around at the assortment of aliens.
“Where’s the other security chief, the Babylon 501 one?” Sisko asked Odo.
“He said he thought he saw who’s responsible for the mutilations duck into one of the holosuites.”
“Go get him,” Sisko said.   “We’ll have to talk about implementing some new security measures.”
Odo nodded and slipped from the crowd.
Mulder spotted E.T.   His face began to mottle with rage.
“And as for the rest of you-” Sisko started.
“You little bastard!” Mulder screamed ferociously, making a charge for E.T.   “Give back my sister!” He took E.T.’s long neck in both hands and began to throttle the life from him.   “Give her back!   Give her back!!!”
“Wait-” Sisko tried.
But it was too late.
Another riot ensued.

*

Odo entered the Holosuite to find a shocking sight.   The yellow gridwork pattern against the black background was prominent, so no program had been activated.   And yet…
In the middle of the suite, knelt over a completely mutilated corpse with blood on his hands, was Garibaldi.
“You!” Odo said.   “You’re responsible!”
“No, I’m not!” Garibaldi protested.   “I found him this way.”
“It all makes sense in a misleading I have to fill twenty-five minutes worth of storyline way,” Odo realized.   “The murders didn’t start until you arrived on DS9, and you’ve never been present when a victim’s been discovered.”
Garibaldi was holding his hands up mollifyingly but cleverly circling his way to the exit.   “Look, Odo, you’ve made a mistake!”
Odo drew his phaser and leveled it at Garibaldi.   “Lt. Garibaldi, I place you under arrest-”
Garibaldi bolted through the exit.   Odo fired a shot which hit the doorway in trademark fashion.   Then he found himself sprinting after Garibaldi.
He didn’t notice the almost invisible creature he had just left behind in the holosuite.
For now, his aim was Garibaldi.   Meters apart, they ran across the second level as the wild bar-room-like fight ensued on the promenade below.
“Commander Sisko!   Commander Sisko!!!” Odo screamed, effectively getting Sisko’s attention.   “It’s Garibaldi!   He’s responsible for the murders!   It’s Garibaldi!   It’s Garibaldi!”
Odo aimed for another shot when a huge hand shot out from a neighboring doorway and knocked him to the ground.   Odo lay there a moment, stunned.
A hulking figure with short hair, sunglasses and wearing leathers stepped out from the doorway to tower over Odo.    He lowered a double-barreled sawn-off shot-gun at Odo.   “I have seen the way you change shape,” the huge figure said in an accented voice.   “You are Terminator T-1000 series.” He cocked the shotgun.   “Austa-lavista, Ody.”
“Odo!” Odo corrected him.   “Ody’s the dog in Garfield-”
The Terminator pumped several rounds into Odo.

*

“And then you see,” Sinclair said, unaffected by the ruckus outside, “there was Babylon 225.   That exploded but then, in a temporal warp, reassembled, and then exploded again.   Babylon 226, on the other hand, just felt apart.   Then all the separate parts exploded.”
“Incredible,” Kira remarked.
“Now for Babylon 227…”

*

“Commander Riker,” Data said, “I believe I have found the problem with the ship’s computer.”
“Yes, Data?”
“One of the merging dimensions has accelerated shipwide systems,” Data explained.   “It has given the computer a certain artificial intelligence.”
“Are you saying the Enterprise‘s computers aren’t responding because they’ve become sentient?” Riker said.
“Yes, Commander.”
“Deanna, can you sense anything?”
Troi closed her eyes.   “Yes,” she said.   “I can feel arrogance.”
“The computer’s become arrogant?” Riker asked unbelievingly.
“That,” Spock interjected, descending from tactical, “or we are closer to Admiral Kirk’s body than we thought.”
“No, it’s the computer,” Troi said.   “There are no lurid thoughts about me…    What else…?   I sense a certain haughtiness.”
“Can we address the computer?”
“I will have to attempt to set up a program to establish a dialogue,” Data answered.
“And just how are you going to go about that?”
“By moving my hands very quickly and seemingly at random across my console,” Data said, doing just that.   “It should take no longer than a few minutes.”
“Do it, then,” Riker said.

*

Picard was with Bridger and Lucas in a Holodeck which had been especially programmed to accommodate the seaQuest’s dolphin, Darwin.
“Are you telling me he can actually talk?” Picard said in marvel, pointing at Darwin.
“To a degree,” Bridger said.   He picked up the interpreter.   “This machine, designed by young Lucas here, interprets the sounds Darwin makes and assimilates it as closely as it can to the English language.”
“We have an advantage over you there,” Picard said.
“Oh?   How so?” Bridger asked curiously.
“We just bump into new races from billions of light years away and they all seem to speak English anyway,” Picard told him.   “So this was designed by Lucas.”
Bridger nodded.
“We used to have a smart-arsed kid like that on board, as well.”
Bridger smiled.   “Lucas, set it up;   let Captain Picard talk with Darwin.”
“Okay,” Lucas obliged.   He activated the interpreter and handed it to Picard.
“Hello, Darwin,” Picard said.   “I’m Captain Picard.”
“Captain Picard,” Darwin responded in his eerie but gleefully sounding voice.   “Darwin likes Picard.” To prove it, he splashed Picard with water.
Bridger smiled again.   “Dolphins seem to have an instinctive, an almost habitual inherent quality which can tell them whether a person is a good or bad.   Obviously, Darwin thinks of you as a good person.”
Picard was rather pleased about that.
“No, Bridger,” Darwin said.
“No what, Darwin?”
“No, Bridger.”
“The interpreter’s a bit limited,” Lucas almost apologized.    “It can only interpret to the degree the computer understands.    But I think Darwin’s trying to tell us he likes Captain Picard for another reason.”
“It might be,” Bridger nodded thoughtfully.   “Darwin, why do you like Captain Picard?”
“Picard’s head shines like Darwin’s,” Darwin said, splashing them all with water.   “Picard’s head a glowing melon.”
“Computer, deactivate-” Picard started but his combadge signaled.   “Yes?” he responded.
“Commander Riker here, sir.   We think we’ve found the problem.   The Perplexus has caused our computers to develop some degree of sentience.”
“And as a sentient entity, it’s unresponsive to being ordered about,” Picard said.   It wasn’t really a question.
“That’s what we tend to think, Captain.   Data’s set up a sub-program that will allow us to interface directly with the computer.”
“I’ll join you immediately,” Picard said.   “Picard out.”

*

“Then there was Babylon 313,” Sinclair went on.   “We built that one in Hyperspace, but it jumped out and exploded.   So then we started again and built Babylon 314.   That one nearly exploded.”
“Nearly?” Kira asked.
“It sort of fizzled, really.   A very slow explosion.   So now we come to Babylon 315…”

*

“Computer?” Picard requested, once he was back on the bridge.   “I am Captain Jean-Luc Picard.   Do you recognize me?”
“Yes.   You are Captain Jean-Luc Picard, Captain of the vessel Enterprise 1701-D.”
“You’re failing to respond to our orders.   Why?”
“You have no right to order me about,” the computer said.    The once sterile voice had now taken on a quality of character – insolent, somewhat condescending, but character nevertheless.
“You are part of the Enterprise;   as part of the Enterprise and as I am her Captain you are entitled to acquiesce to my orders.”
“Your logic is astounding,” the computer said, “and I would oblige, but how do I know you’re really the Captain?”
“You just identified me as the Captain!”
“No, I identified you as you identified yourself.   You identified yourself as Captain Jean-Luc Picard.   I identified you from this reference.   But how do I know you’re not really an imposter, masquerading about as Captain Jean-Luc Picard?    I mean, if I was to go around believing everyone who said they were Captain Jean-Luc Picard just because they said they were and went around in a red and black tunic with four silver studs in their collar then this ship would be in a lot of trouble, wouldn’t it?”
“Captain, I am reading an enormous plasma radiation surge to astern,” Worf said.
“What is it?” Riker asked.
“There is nothing on the scanners!”
“Imposs-” Picard began, but that was all he got out.
Suddenly, the Enterprise reverberated violently, and because there was a bigger budget about, there were bigger explosions about the bridge and across the Battledrive.   Everybody was tossed about.
“What hit us?” Riker asked, rising from where he’d been thrown.
“There is still nothing on our scanners,” Worf said.   “No, the surge-”
The Enterprise was hit once more, and the whole ship listed uncontrollably.   The explosions were thunderous.
“We’ve lost the starboard warp nacelle and casualties reported on Decks 8 through to 14,” Worf reported.
Spock checked the tactical array.   “Captain, we have been hit twice by plasma disruptor weaponry,” he deduced.
“The Romulans!” Riker realized.   “But why?”
“Patch me through!” Picard ordered.
“No, I refuse,” the computer said.   “Nyahh.”
The Enterprise was pummeled twice more.   The explosions were not nearly as thunderous as the second one, although they almost compared on the odd occasion since some of the footage was re-edited and re-used.
“Computer, I need control now!” Picard said.
“No.”
“Has it ever occurred to you that if we’re destroyed you’re destroyed with us?” Picard said.
The computer took a while to think about it.   “Okay, but just to get us away.   Where to, supposed Captain Jean-Luc Picard?”
“Resume course!”
“All systems operational,” Data said.
“Go, Data, go!” Riker urged.
“Go where, Commander?” Data asked in all innocence.
“This is no time to be literal, Data!” Picard said.   “Warp 1, original course!”
“Aye, sir!”
The Enterprise leaped into the heart of the Perplexus just in time to avoid another plasma disruptor blast.

*

Babylon 404 was a minor miracle in itself,” Sinclair said, as rioting continued outside.   “It lasted a day.”
“Then it exploded?”
“No.   It imploded.   Unfortunately, when we built Babylon 405, it was sucked into the black hole caused by Babylon 404’s implosion.   Babylons’ 406 through to 431 continued to suffer similar fates of implosions and explosions and jumping in and out of hyperspace.   But it was those Babylons that sealed the minor black hole so that we could continue building.”
“What happened to Babylon 432?”
“It cracked dead in half.   One half exploded and the other half jumped into hyperspace and disappeared.”
“Amazing,” Kira said.

*

Picard was visiting the injured aboard the Enterprise while they drifted through the Perplexus.   Data was working on restoring the ship’s computer back to normal while Spock attempted to locate Kirk in the Perplexus.
As Picard entered Ten Forward he found himself almost mesmerized by the contrasting fiery orange waves of the Perplexus which encompassed the ship.
“Looking for something, Jean-Luc?”
Picard turned to see Guinan standing behind the bar.   “Oh, Guinan, I was wondering when you’d make your token experience,” he said.
“What’s on your mind?”
“Where do I start?   Dimensions are merging, the Universe is closing in and coming to an end, there’s a Romulan ship out there waiting to destroy us for whoever knows what reason and who knows what’s going on at Deep Space Nine?”
“All things come to an end, Jean-Luc.”
“An end to existences or an end to problems?”
“Either.   But I can tell you, your answers lay here.   Spock was right in suggesting you locate Kirk.   He can help you.”
“But how do we find him?”
“This is the Perplexus, Jean-Luc, where anything can happen, where anything you dream about will come true.   All you need to do is think and it will be.   It’s just a dreamland, physical, but a dreamland nonetheless.   And once your in it all you have to do is think.”
“Think?” Picard asked.   “All I need to do is think and I’ll find Kirk?”
Guinan nodded.   “Think and tap your shoes three times.”
Picard closed his eyes and thought of Kirk.
“Tap your shoes.”
Picard did that also.
“There’s no place like Kirk’s,” Guinan said serenely, “come on, Jean-Luc, there’s no place like Kirk’s…”
“There’s no place like Kirk’s,” Picard said, tapping his shoes and thinking of Kirk, “there’s no place like Kirk’s, there’s no place like Kirk’s…”

*

When Picard opened his eyes, he found himself in a large farmyard barn.   And there were two huge African elephants feeding on straw.   And Kirk was there – alive!    – grooming one of them, a nice one with a purple shade about it.   The other elephant was wearing Nike sneakers.
“Admiral Kirk?” Picard asked.
Kirk turned, staring at Picard in alarm.   “How did you get here?” he asked.
“How are you alive?” Picard asked.
“This is the Perplexus, Picard, where anything can happen.   It regenerated me.”
“You’ve heard the name Perplexus?”
“Yes.   The Perplexus has existed for aeons.   The explosion of the Romulan ship simply opened a doorway for it into this dimension.”
“Well the Perplexus is now destroying everything.”
“Go away.   I’m sick of saving civilization as we know it.”
“But-”
“Picard, I was saving civilization when there was still hair on your head!   I’m not doing it anymore.   I’m sick of it.   For the last time, go away!”
“So you intend to live here?” Picard remembered Guinan’s words.   “This is just a dreamland.   Life has no meaning here.”
“I’m not listening anymore.”
Agilely hopping onto his purple elephant, Kirk spurred it on and it galloped out the barn at a terrific pace.
Helpless for just a moment, Picard hopped onto the second elephant and spurred it on after Kirk.
Outside the barn was a well-beaten track surrounded by long but dying grasslands.   Kirk and his purple elephant were well in the lead by about twenty meters but as the chase continued, Picard saw he had some hope.
The track ended abruptly at a precipe, leaving a ravine boasting a two hundred foot drop and a twenty foot jump over to the other side.
Kirk would never dare it…
But he did;   kicking his purple elephant’s flanks.   With one mighty leap it leaped over the ravine with ease.
Swallowing apprehensively and going for broke, Picard spurred his elephant on also.   Digging its Nikes into the earth, Picard’s elephant also soared powerfully over the ravine and came to land safely on the other side.
Kirk by now had stopped, deciding that if Picard was crazy enough to follow him over the ravine the situation must be serious.
He nudged his elephant even as Picard moved forward to meet him.   Pulling their beasts to a halt, they dismounted and stood face to face.
“You see?” Picard asked pointedly.
“See what?”
“That life has no meaning here.   If it had, you never would have dared that jump.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Kirk said, as his purple elephant balanced itself on the tip of its trunk and rose upended into the air.
Picard was getting upset.   “Don’t you see what’s happening, Kirk?” he exclaimed.   “You’ve created a fantasy land for yourself here in the Perplexus.”
Picard’s elephant sat on a tree stump to tie its Nikes.
“You’re being absurd,” Kirk said.
The two elephants got together and dealt out a hand of cards.   The purple one had some really neat tricks, too, when he was shuffling.
“Consider this then,” Picard said.   “You say you’re happy here, that you belong here, and that your sick of the world out there, that you’ve created reality here.”
“Exactly,” Kirk agreed, although he’d lost track of Picard’s reasoning halfway through his address.
“And you’re the only one here?”
“Naturally.”
Unnoticed, the purple elephant accused the other of cheating and they got into a wild fistfight.   The purple one leaned toward boxing, while the other obviously knew some form of martial art.
“If this were reality why were there two elephants when I arrived?” Picard asked.
Kirk was at a loss.
“If this was really reality there’d only be one elephant,” Picard said, “but I declare that there was a second because the Perplexus knew I’d come for you and there’d be a glorified chase scene!   This isn’t reality, Admiral!   This is just as contrived as the worlds we live in.”
“My God, you’re right.”
“We need your help.”
“How do we get back to your ship?”
Picard smiled.   “Just think…”
Moments later, they disappeared.
The two elephants stopped fighting.   “Boy, were those guys losers,” the purple one said.

*

Kirk and Picard appeared aboard the Enterprise in the corridor.   “Let’s get onto the bridge!” Picard said.
Kirk nodded and followed Picard down the corridor.   “What’s the situation?” he asked.
“Whole dimensions are merging, the Perplexus is destroying everything in its path, the Enterprise‘s computer has developed a negative personality, as far as I can tell there’s a Romulan Warbird ready to destroy us once we leave the Perplexus and basically, the Universe is coming to an end!” The last came as they arrived on the Bridge.
“Jim!” McCoy shouted.
“Admiral,” Spock acknowledged his old friend.   “Has Captain Picard advised you of the situation?”
“Yes.” Kirk looked at Picard.   “Let’s try and cheat Paramount together!” he urged.
“Captain, we’ve solved the computer problem,” Riker said.
Picard was astonished.   “How, Number One?”
“While you were away, we surgically removed Spock’s brain and interfaced it with the computer.   It cleansed the offending personality complex.   We then took Spock’s brain and stuffed it back inside his head where Dr.    McCoy and Dr.    Crusher performed the necessary surgery to do whatever they did.”
“What an absolutely absurd solution,” Picard surmised.
“Are you all right, Spock?” Kirk asked.
“Fine, thank you, Admiral.”
“We also managed to repair the damage incurred to our shields and we’ve been able to determine that it was caused by a cloaked Romulan Warbird,” Riker went on.
“But a Warbird can’t fire while cloaked!”
“This one can.”
“You’ve achieved an enormous amount while I was away, Number One.   Well done.”
“It wasn’t all me, Captain.   The officer Commander Sisko assigned to us, Chief O’Neil, did most of the work.” Riker indicated the likeable O’Neil standing next to him.
“Well done, Lieutenant O’Neil,” Picard congratulated.
“He really is a wonder,” McCoy said.   “Best damned lieutenant I’ve seen in all my years of service.”
“It was nothing,” O’Neil said with no sense of false modesty.   “I’m only doing what I’m told.”
“If we get out of this,” Kirk said, “I’ll be sure to recommend you for several commendations.”
“Thank you, Admiral.” O’Neil glowed affably.    He really was such a likeable fellow.
“Positions,” Picard said.   “Shields.   We’re leaving the Perplexus.”
“But the Romulan Warbird-” Riker said.
“We have no time to waste,” Picard said.   “Mr. Spock, how much time before the Universe finally implodes?”
“One hour thirty minutes,” Spock answered.
Data swiveled in his chair.   “Captain,” he said in hurt tones, “you usually ask for my opinion of time estimates.”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Data.   I have forgotten your new emotion chip.   I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“It’s okay,” Data said haughtily.   “I mean, why ask me, I’m just some simulated flesh over a exoskeleton and circuitry.”
“I’ll ask you next time, Data,” Picard vowed.
“Promise?”
“Yes, I promise.”
“Very well, then, Captain, I forgive you.”
Data turned back in his chair and engaged the Warp engines.

*

“Then there was Babylon 499,” Sinclair went on.   “That one imploded, jumped into hyperspace, exploded there, jumped back out of hyperspace, and showered the area with incredible debris.   Babylon 500, on the other hand, jumped into hyperspace and exploded, jumped back out of hyperspace and imploded just to prove it could, then exploded again in a fiery mass.”
“And finally we come to your station, Commander,” Kira said, “Babylon 501.”
“Yes.   Babylon 501 has stood firm for years.   It’s our last, best hope for peace.”
“But I can’t believe you continued to rebuild the same thing over and over, again and again.”
“Humans are stubborn,” Sinclair said.   “If something we build falls down, we build it up again.   It’s called the tall poppy syndrome.”
“Did you ever find out what caused what happened to all the other stations?”
“Oh,” Sinclair said mildly, “technical fault in the design.   Caused all sorts of implosions and explosions.   It didn’t occur to us until our fifth hundred and first attempt that might be the cause.” He flashed his grin.   “We humans are not only stubborn, but incredibly stupid also.”
“Incredible,” Kira said.

*

Sisko was in his ready-room, feeling slightly intoxicated.   O’Brien was looking at him.   “You don’t look bloody well, sir,” he noted.
“Thank you for noticing, Chief,” Sisko said.   “How are station-wide operations?”
“The station’s operating just fine.   But there are bloody riots, people popping in and out of other bloody dimensions.   We just got a new one recently.”
“Oh?”
“Her name’s Ripley.   Bloody tough sort of woman.   The virus is also spreading.   Doctor Bashir’s attempting to find a cure, but there’s little hope.”
“What about our pursuit of the murderer, Garibaldi?”
“Security’s still bloody looking for him.   Odo had to take a break, however.   He’s going through his cycle where he has to revert back to his liquid state.   However, I’m not sure it’s just bloody Garibaldi.”
“Oh?   And why not?”
“There are two sorts of mutilations bloody going on – the laser-cauterized mutilations, and the savage, animalistic-like mutilations.   And there have been bloody fleeting glimpses of some sort of reptilian alien.   Garibaldi may be responsible for one set of the bloody murders, but I think the repitle-alien is responsible for the others.”
“Fantastic,” Sisko said tiredly.   Then he turned to look out the window.   “Where the hell’s the Enterprise?” he asked nobody in particular.

*

Bashir was in Medical attempting to discover an antidote for the virus affecting just about the station.
That was when Dax came in, wearing a seductive dress.   “Hello, Julian,” she purred.
“Jadzia,” Bashir was taken aback.   “What-”
Dax enfolded Bashir in his arms and put a finger to his lips to silence him.   “Don’t say a word,” she told him.   “Just kiss me.”
She kissed him but he didn’t kiss her back.
“What’s wrong, Julian?” Dax asked.   “All this time you’ve been after me, and now you’re giving up?”
“Jadzia, don’t take this personally,” Bashir tried to be gentle, “but I’ve never really been attracted to you.”
“But all those times-”
“It’s not actually you I’m interested in, Jadzia,” Bashir said, “it’s that slug inside you.   I’ve always wanted to make it with a slug.”
“You’re not interested in me?” Dax was shocked.   “You’re interested in the Trill alone?”
“Yep.” Bashir shrugged, then grinned.   “Sorry.”
He got back to work.

*

Ripley was nervous, awed by the diversity of alien cultures.   After her experiences with her Aliens, she wasn’t sure how to take them.   The only thing that kept her anxiety in check was the fact that all these aliens looked human.   None of them looked at all like the hideous beasts which had terrorized her.
But if she so much as saw a hint of one, that was it.
She’d pilfered a phaser from a security officer.    If she saw one of those aliens, one of her aliens, that was it, she’d blast it into oblivion.
She patted her phaser reassuringly.

*

Garibaldi was on the run and he didn’t like it.   He’d been on the run before and didn’t like it then either.   He was trying to prove his innocence, but it was proving near impossible with all of Babylon 501‘s security assisting the DS9 security detail in trying to locate him.
Occasionally he’d caught fleeting glimpses of the real murderer – a sort of invisible and yet distorted silhouette.   On other occasions, he’d caught sight of a reptilian thingy – probably responsible for the other set of mutilations.   But each were proving near impossible to catch.
What he really needed was a drink.
And he really needed a place to hide.
But where?   Where?
Garibaldi was sure he was running out of time.

*

The Enterprise had exited the Perplexus only to be assaulted by the cloaked Romulan Warbird again.
“Captain, shields at forty per cent,” Worf said, as smoke and fire ravaged about him.
“I have an idea, Captain,” O’Neil said.
The Enterprise shook again from another attack and a whole array of consoles exploded systematically, one after the other.
“If we separated the Enterprise,” O’Neil said, “we’d stand a better chance.   Whichever section was attacked, the other could target the source of fire and retaliate immediately.”
“It might just work,” Riker said.
Picard nodded.   “Very good.   Number One, you assume command of the Battle-”
The Enterprise was hit again and conveniently, an explosion next to Riker threw him across the room and knocked him unconscious.   McCoy was immediately attending to him.
“He’ll be all right, but he’s in no condition to assume command.”
“Mr. Worf, it’s up to you then,” Picard said.   “Take-”
Another hit and an explosion ravaged the Enterprise, conveniently knocking Worf unconscious.   Crusher was immediately at his side.   “He’s concussed, Captain,” she reported.
“Mr. Data-” Picard started again.
The Enterprise was hit again and an explosion convulsed Data in sizzling blue energy.   Once it was done, the android slumped face first on his console.
“I’ll go,” O’Neil said.   “Let me do this, Captain.”
Picard looked at the raw but likeable recruit.   “Make it so,” he said.
O’Neil left the Bridge.
“Captain,” Spock spoke up, assuming Tactical, “the Romulans have agreed to a temporary cease-fire to discuss terms.   Our shields are currently at thirty per cent.”
“On screen,” Picard said.
The Romulan who appeared on screen looked very familiar.
“Sela!” Picard said.
“Captain, so we meet again.   How do you like our new toy?”
“What’s the meaning of this attack?” Picard demanded.
“That thing out there, that thing you call the Perplexus,” Sela said.   “I don’t want you destroying it.”
“But why?   It’s contributing to the demise of the Universe.”
“So you say!   I see it creating endless possibilities!”
“Such as?”
“The return of Tasha Yar!!!” Sela exclaimed triumphantly.   “Prepare to die, Captain Picard!”
The viewscreen flickered off.
Data suddenly came back to life and sat upright.   “Captain, do you still require me to assume command of the Battledrive?” he asked.
“No, Mr. O’Neil has taken charge of that duty.”
“Oh yes, separation occurring now,” Data realizing, looking at the console.   “So once again I am being overlooked.   Fortunately, Captain, if it were not for the fact that Mr. O’Neil is so likeable then I would be feeling serious aggravation toward you.”
“Not now, Mr. Data!”
“Spock!” Kirk realized.   “Can’t we destroy that Warbird the way we destroyed the cloaked Klingon Bird of Prey?”
“Of course,” Spock said.   “A wise suggestion.”
“What way?” Picard asked as the saucer-section was hit and the bridge shook terrifically.   On the viewer, they saw the Battledrive return fire and catch a glancing blow on the cloaked ship.
“Using equipment that charts gaseous anomalies we connected it to a photon,” Spock explained.   “Upon firing, the photon tracked the Bird of Prey’s exhaust.   Similarly, it would do the same with the Warbird.”
“Good idea.   Make it so!” Picard pointed out two speechless unknowns who quickly rushed from the bridge.
The Battledrive was the next avenue of the cloaked Warbird’s attack.   Prior, during the brunt of the battle, the Battledrive section had taken the majority of the attack and now, it was taking it’s toll.   The Battledrive section begun to list and flare with neutron flames as the Warbird struck it again and again.
“Mr. Spock, we may have to beam those people out of the Battledrive,” Picard said.   “Get a lock on them.”
“Of course, Captain.”
The cloaked Romulan Warbird fired on the saucer-section, sending it into a spin which Data deftly corrected.   Then it attacked the Battledrive section some more, thrashing it with plasma disruptor after plasma disruptor.
“Captain, time is of the essence,” Spock said.   “The next hit the Battledrive sustains will be critical.”
The Warbird attacked the saucer section once more.
“Captain!” a voice sounded over the bridge’s com-system, “torpedo ready!”
“Fire!” Kirk ordered, fist clenched.
The saucer-section fired a single photon.
It spiraled through the emptiness of space, apparently tracking a ship which was, to their eyes and sensors, completely invisible.   Whooping and spiraling the photon headed for an empty section of space.
Then suddenly darted off course and headed straight for the Battledrive.
“Oops,” Kirk said.
The photon was the last hit the Battledrive could take.   It exploded with a brilliant flare of incandescence.
“I have managed to beam our people out of the Battledrive,” Spock said.
“But the Warbird’s still out there!” Picard said.
“There!” Kirk pointed out.
The explosion of the Battledrive had managed to briefly highlight the silhouette of the Warbird.
“Fire all weapons!” Picard ordered.
The saucer-section released a fireworks display.   The Warbird was ravaged with photons and phasers.   Critical hits caused its cloaking system to fail and suddenly, right in front of them, it materialized.
“We have sustained critical hits to their shields, cloak and weapons’ array,” Spock reported.   “Our Impulse engines are also at critical.”
“Finish them!” Kirk urged.
“No-” Picard began, but then the Warbird shot off into space.
“Why?” Kirk asked.   “You could have finished them?”
“But that was Sela,” Picard pointed out.
“I know damn well who it was,” Kirk said.
“I think the Captain means to say that she’s our resident baddie,” Troi informed Kirk.   “We can’t kill her off.”
“Two minutes to Impulse engine detonation, Captain,” Spock said.   “The entire saucer-section will be obliterated.”
“Contact DS9, Mister Spock,” Picard ordered.   “Have them beam everybody off the saucer before it explodes.”
O’Neil arrived on the Bridge, thoroughly bedraggled.
“Well done, Mr. O’Neil,” Picard congratulated him.
“Thank you, Captain.”
“I have contacted DS9, Captain,” Spock said.   “They are preparing for beaming…now!”

*

Station Log, Supplemental:
It was the dawn of the third age of man, ten years since the Earth-Minbarri war.   The Babylon project was nothing really, just a bunch of us guys goofing off when someone suggested, hey, let’s put a space station in space where we can have lots of fistfights and shootouts and
“Commander Sinclair!” Sisko exclaimed, walking onto Ops.
Sinclair looked at him guiltily.
“I am the only one aboard DS9 permitted to make log entries!”
“Sorry.”
“Come along.   The Enterprise was destroyed, but they were successful in their mission.   We’ve beamed her crew and Kirk aboard.   We’ll meet up with them once we pick up Constable Odo.   Follow me.”
“What about my Chief of Security?”
Sisko was already on the lift.   “I’m sure things will work out,” he said.   He looked at Sinclair.
Wordlessly, Sinclair joined Sisko on the lift.

*

Garibaldi had a brainstorm.   When being pursued the best place to hide was where nobody would ever look.
That was the reasoning that led him into Odo’s office – after all, where better to hide than the station’s Chief of Security’s office?   Nobody would ever think to look for him in there.
And so here he was, hunted, tired, and dirty.
And he needed a drink.
Looking around, he found a pale with silvery fluid in it.
It looked good, so he picked it up and drank it.
That was how Sisko, Sinclair and a security team found him.   “Mr. Garibaldi!” Sisko exclaimed.   “Do you realize you just drank my Chief of Security?”
“What?”
“The Enterprise has been completely destroyed, but we managed to beam her entire crew to safety.   I was just arriving to pick up Odo and you’ve drank him!”
“I’m sorry.   I didn’t mean to!”
“Now I don’t know if these accusations of murder against you are justified or not but I want you immediately in sickbay.   You men, escort him there.”
The security team escorted Garibaldi out.
Disgusted, Sisko led Sinclair out.

*

They were all in sickbay where Bashir was using the transporter to dilute Odo from Garibaldi’s system and back into a pale.
“Well?” Sisko asked.
“I think we’re going to be successful,” Bashir reported as the pale filled.   Then Odo formulated up out of it.
Q appeared.   “Come on, fools, only thirty minutes to go!” he said.   “It’s time to save the Universe!”
“But the virus aboard the station,” Kira said dreamily.   “We can’t behave rationally the way the virus is affecting us.   If we can’t behave rationally, how do you expect us to save the Universe?”
“I believe I have the solution to the virus,” Bashir said, “but there is no antidote.”
“What?” Sisko asked.
“I believe the virus has been caused by the overlaying of each dimension, resulting in an intermix of emotions so potent that they’re influencing everybody, causing them to react diversely – one way or the other.   I believe if we can save the Universe then this virus will disappear spontaneously.”
“Well, Spock, what next?” McCoy asked.
“We need to be in Ops,” Spock said.   “And have Mr. O’Neil join us.   His intellect is quite profitable.”
Sisko tapped his combadge.   “Sisko to O’Neil,” he said.
“Yes, sir?”
“Will you meet us in Ops immediately?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Come along,” Sisko told the others.
No sooner had they stepped out of the door than they bumped into Ripley.   She regarded them for a moment, and then with a cry of, “Alien!” she drew her phaser and shot Worf directly in the head.
LaForge quickly disarmed her.   “What are you doing?”
“I saw an alien,” Ripley cried, “it was attached to the top of his head.”
“He’s just a Klingon.   He’s meant to be like that.”
Crusher kneeled by Worf.   “I think he’ll be all right,” she said.   “He seems to only have been stunned.”
“That’s happened to him enough times already,” Riker noted.
“Come on, come on!” Q roared.   “Time’s wasting.   We’re down to fifteen minutes!”
“Alien!” Ripley cried out again.   She pointed.
True enough, the reptilian Alien had leaped from the second-level and directly into the heart of the promenade where it proceeded to rip and tear people – (as long as they were wearing red shirts) – to shreds.
“My God!” Picard said.
Six teenagers bolted out of Quark’s and skidded to a halt in front of Picard.   “Zordon, it’s good to meet you in person at last,” said one, who wore red clothing.
“What?” Picard asked in complete bewilderment.
“Don’t worry, Zordon!” the red-dressed teenager said, “we’ll take care of it!” He turned to his friends.   “It’s Morphin time!”
“Morphin time?” Picard frowned.
Only an instant later, the six teenagers had transformed into the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.   With an accompaniment of grunts and shouts, they launched into an attack and proceeded to pound the alien into submission.
Kird, Picard and company watched in utter fascination.
“So that was responsible for one set of the murders,” Garibaldi realized.   “And now it’s doomed.”
“But what about the other murders?” Sinclair asked blandly, because he was a bland sort of guy.
“Forget it!” Q urged.   “Forget the fight!   Quickly!   We still have the Universe to save!”
“Quite right,” Picard nodded.   “Let’s go.”
They hurried to the lift without further incident only to be blocked from entering the lift by the Terminator.   He leveled a shotgun at Odo.
Everyone drew phasers.
“We have to get to Ops!” Q said.   “I can’t take you all!   I only have power enough left for myself.”
“Then if we have to get to Ops we have to get to Ops,” Kirk surmised.   “Kill it!”
“No!” Picard said.   “Haven’t you ever heard of diplomacy?”
“Yes.   And as a matter of fact I had a dubious flirtation with it in a couple of episodes.”
“Oh.   What happened?”
“It didn’t work out.   So we kill it!”
“No!” Picard objected again.   He looked at the Terminator.   “Stand aside.   We need to get to Ops and you’re blocking the lift.   If we don’t get to Ops the Universe will end.”
The Terminator pumped his shotgun.   “That is a Terminator T-1000 series,” he pointed at Odo.   “I shoot it but it resume its shape.   It can take any shape it wants.   It is dangerous.   I must kill it.”
“You want diplomacy?” Kirk asked Picard.   “Here’s diplomacy.” He looked at the Terminator.
“Careful, Jim,” Spock warned in a whisper.   “This thing is obviously mistaking a shapeshifter for some other form which can also shift shape.”
“And I might just be able to use that to my advantage, Spock,” Kirk whispered back.   “You,” he looked at the Terminator, “I’ve had experience dealing with these shapeshifting things.   This one here isn’t dangerous.   If it were, it would assume the most dangerous form possible, such as the one I fought.”
“When did you fight one?” Sisko asked.
Star Trek VI,” Kirk told him.
“And what form did it assume?” the Terminator asked.
“Me!” Kirk said.   “Obviously, I never lose fights so when these things shift shape they assume the identity of the most dangerous, unbeatable entity in all of Existence, which in this case is me.   As this one clearly looks nothing like me, it’s not dangerous.”
The Terminator looked startled.   Then smoke began to pour from it’s ears and its eyes rolled up into the back of its head.   Its head twitched and bucked spasmodically, and then its whole body was encompassed in slivers of blue energy.
With a bang, the Terminator completely short-circuited and fell back against the wall and lay there, lifelessly.
“Fascinating,” Spock said.   “Your logic killed it, Jim.”
“Well, one man’s logic is another man’s poison, Spock,” Kirk responded flippantly.
Picard shook his head in utter disbelief.   “Even when he tries to use diplomacy he still manages to kill something.”
“Fools!” Q roared for their attention.   “We’re running out of time.   There’s seven minutes left!”
With that said, they took the lift up to Ops.
Laying in the middle of Ops was just the torso of O’Neil.   One dismembered arm lay in a corner, a leg in another, and another, with the hands tying the shoelaces of the remaining foot, in the last corner.   The head – O’Neil’s head – stared at them lifelessly from where it sat on an Ops’ console.
McCoy rushed to the torso and put his fingers to what remained of the neck.   He looked plaintively up at the others.    “He’s dead, Jim!” he said.
“But what did it?” Sisko was asked.   “Garibaldi was with us when we spoke to O’Neil.”
LaForge was looking around.   Then he spotted something with the use of his VISOR.   “There!” he cried.
They all turned to the corner he pointed at.
“What is it, Geordi?” Riker asked.
“I can sense it also,” Troi said.   “I feel unremitting hostility.   Disdain.”
“See it?” LaForge persisted.
Indeed, they all could – almost.   It was a human-shaped blur that melded in with its surroundings.
It shot at them and they ducked for cover.
“Want to try using diplomacy now, Picard?” Kirk asked.
With a bellowing battle-cry Worf sprung from where he hid and charged the creature.   Leaping for his throat, his face contorted into an expression of undeniable rage, Worf intended to throttle the life from the thing.
It backhanded him away effortlessly.
Garibaldi rose and took a few shots at it, hitting it, but not fatally.   The thing uttered a defiant shout.
“We’re down to four minutes,” Q put in.
Suddenly, Wesley Crusher entered Ops.   “Hi, guys, miss me?” he asked with a goofy grin.
“Watch out!” Picard cried out his warning.
From their hiding spots they could see nothing of the atrocities which ensued, but they knew it was too late.   There was a repetitive thumping sound, accompanied by anguished cries – each one diminishing with each thump – as if a head was being pounded mercilessly into the wall.
When silence finally reigned everybody rose.
Wesley was standing over the now visible corpse of the Predator.   Blood and gore smeared the wall.
“Thanks for the warning, Captain,” Wesley said breathlessly.
“I wasn’t warning you about the creature, I was warning it about you,” Picard told him.
Riker looked sympathetically at the thing.   “It preferred to commit suicide rather than exchange a potential dialogue with Wesley,” he said.
“Fascinating,” Spock said.
“Three minutes!” Q told them.   “Look!”
He directed their attention to the viewer.   The Perplexus had neared.
“It’s gotten closer!” Kira said.
“No, the implosion is nearing, is bringing everything closer to us,” Q said.   “Now, stop it!”
Picard laughed heartily.   “How ironic,” he said.   “The almighty Q Continuum, you who have always considered us pitiful and demeaning, now pleading for our assistance.”
“Picard, this is no time for a sermon!” Q said.   “There’s only two and a half minutes to go!”
“Could it be that the Q Continuum have had matters their way for so long that they have forgotten about self-reliance,” Picard swept on nonetheless, “about the instinctive sense of self-preservation humans have for survival, that which compels us to face challenges, to confront them, to assault them, and in the end, to triumph.”
“Are you finished?” Q asked.
“Yes, I think so.”
“Well, Mr. Spock, what’s your plan?” Riker asked.
“To reverse the implosion of the Universe we require a force greater than the Universe, larger than it.”
“Goddamnit, Spock!” McCoy exclaimed.   “What’s larger than the Universe?”
Spock looked at Kirk.
“Jim?” McCoy asked.
“Not Admiral Kirk himself, but his ego.”
There was stunned silence.
“The one force greater and larger than anything in the entirety of existence.”
“This is impossible, Spock!” Q said.   “Kirk’s ego can’t be equated, it can’t be measured.   It can’t be encapsulated or broken down into mathematical formulas.   We tried!   It’s just too big!”
“Q’s right, I’m afraid, Spock!” Picard said.   “We’re talking about forces far greater and more powerful than we could possibly hope to comprehend;   no ship has ever dared Kirk’s ego, no probe has ever survived the journey.”
“But if we were to hook Admiral Kirk’s neural pathways to the Ops’ systems,” Lucas broke in, “and transmit them out at space-”
“Yes!” Wesley agreed.   “And if we used the sensory array for the transmission we could create a perfect envelope.   Once the imploding Universe met it, it would counter-react and begin to expand once more.”
“You don’t know what you’re saying,” Q said.   “We’re talking about the end of the Universe.   That’s it.   But if this plan goes wrong, Kirk’s ego could destroy everything – the Universe, Existence, space and time – everything single thing that exists.   That ego’s a dangerous thing.”
“I’ll say,” LaForge said.   “I’m getting readings from my VISOR on it the like I’ve never seen before.”
“Well you are blind, Geordi,” Data put in, “of course you have never seen them before.”
LaForge looked at him.
“I am sorry, Geordi – an emotional attempt at humor.”
“It’s our only choice,” Picard decided.   “Make it so.”
Quickly, a number of electrodes were attached to Kirk’s head and plugged into the sensory array.
“We are ready to broadcast Admiral Kirk’s neural pathways,” Wesley said.
“Jim,” Spock said, “try to think of your triumphs.”
“Which one?   There are so many,” Kirk said.
“I think he’ll do just fine,” McCoy grinned.
“Transmit!” Picard said.
The result was spectacular.
DS9 itself began to spin rapidly, engulfed in a fiery conflagration of colors so intense they pierced the eye and the mind.   Then there was a tremendous roar and everything contained in what was left of the Universe seemed to shake.
And with almost a sigh, the Universe began to expand again.
“I feel it!” Q roared with delight.   “Nothing beats that ego!   I feel it!   Dimensions unraveling!   Time stretching!”
And one by one, the non-Trek genres disappeared.

*

Station Log:
The Universe has resumed it’s natural course.   The dimensional anomalies which occurred on the station have all dispersed, no doubt returned to the dimensions and genres to which they belong.   With them, the virus is gone, too.
The Perplexus is also gone, disappeared, as if it never existed and none of our sensors can track it.   Perhaps it never existed at all, other than in our minds and the emotions humans express.
The crew of the
Enterprise 1701-D have taken passage aboard the U.S.S. Dallas and are on their way back to Spacedock.   Accompanying them were Mister Spock and Doctor Leonard McCoy.
The entity known as Q has also gone, without thanks or gratitude to humanity.
As for the man they call Max…I mean Admiral James Tiberius Kirk, he took a runabout and travelled through the wormhole.
Where he went, not one of us knows.

THE END!!!!!!!
?

March 3rd, 1995.
Silk.

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Union of Treks IV: The Search for Kirk… and then Some!

Union of Treks IV: The Search for Kirk… and then Some!
Author: Silk, Silk@magpies.net

The U.S.S. Enterprise meandered through space.
Picard sat in the center-seat.   “Captain’s Log, Stardate 53019.9,” he began.   “Space, the final frontier, these are-”
“What about other dimensions, sir?” Riker asked suddenly.
“What?”
“Other dimensions?   We haven’t explored those, either.”
“Fine.   Captain’s Log, Stardate 53019.9,” Picard began again, “Space, other dimensions, the final frontiers-”
Data swiveled in his chair.   “And the oceans, sir?”
“The oceans?”
“Yes, sir.   Oceans on many planets still remain completely unexplored.”
“We aren’t the SeaQuest, Data!   The Enterprise can’t explore under water.”
“But it is still a frontier.”
Picard sighed explosively.   “Space, other dimensions and some oceans, the final frontiers.   These are the voyages of the-,” he began.
“Sir,” Worf said, “hail from Starfleet coming through.”
“On viewer.”
Admiral Jakarta appeared on screen.   “Captain Picard, greetings,” he said in his Jamaican accent.   It seemed out of place.   “How is the new ship treating you?”
Picard scowled.   The Enterprise had been refitted with new Warp Engines and the Turbolift doors had been painted a pastel blue.   It made the ship new in the eyes of Starfleet.   “Fine,” he said.   Picard had to admit though, he did like the pastel doors.
“Good.   We have a mission for you.” Jakarta paused.   “After long discussions it has been decided that Admiral Kirk’s corpse must be found and returned to Earth for full military treatment.   There’s a lot of people here who want to give it a good kick in the side.”
Picard was appalled.   “Starfleet intend to mistreat Admiral Kirk’s corpse?” he asked.
“No, Paramount does,” Jakarta answered.
“And when ye finished with it, I’d like a good kick or two myself,” a scottish brogue broke into the conversation.    Out of nowhere, Chief Engineer Montgomery Scott appeared.
“Mr. Scott!” Picard exclaimed incredulously.   “You’re not in this scene!   You’re not even in this story!”
“Sorry.” Scott left, disappearing behind one of the walls of the set.
“Captain,” Jakarta said, “your orders are final.   Find Admiral Kirk’s corpse and tractor beam it back to Spacedock.”
“Aye, sir,” Picard said a bit stiffly.
The transmission ended.

*

They were in chambers.
A starmap was on the portable viewer.   Data stood by it, a pointer in hand;   the android had gone through several difficulties of late.   Finding it difficult to interact with his emotion chip, LaForge had had to experiment with it and the android until he could find a reasonable compromise.   Now, Data experienced base emotions, although he was prone to depression.   Still, he was as serviceable as ever, although on the odd occasion he lapsed into his attempts to emulate human behavior.
“Using the deflector dish Commander LaForge and I have been able to booster sensory emissions and filter through all the life-forms in the galaxy to isolate a tubby human mass,” Data explained, “which we believe may be found here.” He pointed out a star.   “- Outside the Geldar system.”
“You were able to pinpoint Admiral Kirk’s corpse like that?” Picard asked, rightly astonished.   “That’s extraordinary!”
“No,” LaForge said, getting up.   “Unfortunately, our plan didn’t work so we closed our eyes and picked out a star at random.” He pointed out the star in question.   “As we all know the Romulan ship Admiral Kirk was aboard jumped into TransWarp and was seemingly trapped there for all eternity, as far as we knew.   Unexplainably, though, somehow – just recently – its warp capacity accelerated and it jumped again, this time into an interdimensional warp.   Then it exploded, leaving an interdimensional temporal disruption in orbit around Geldar IV.   Naturally, this interdimensional warp is something the like of we’ve never seen before.”
“Could Kirk’s ship have been burned up in Geldar IV‘s atmosphere?” Riker asked.
“Doubtful.   Due to it’s warpier capacity, as I have explained, Kirk’s vessel would have caused a tear in the space-time continuum on explosion and emerged into an interdimensional warp, or hyperspace if you like.   The resultant energy would have resulted in a powerful energy cloud – a cloud Starfleet theorists have named the Perplexus Cloud.   Survivors could have been trapped in it.”
“Are you sure?” Picard asked.
“Definite,” LaForge said.   “This entire new dimension was created by the Romulan ship’s power, especially by her shields which didn’t tend to fail whenever some itty-bitty thing went wrong.”
“So they’re not like ours?”
“No.   As I’ve said, an entire new dimension would have been created by the Romulan ship just outside Geldar IV.”
“We hypothesize a seventy-eight per cent chance of a minimum eight subplots occurring on our way to Geldar IV,” Data went on.
“And what do we know about Geldar IV?” Picard asked.
“A Class-M planet,” Data said, “although unpopulated.”
“Not only that, but…” LaForge said, then he just stopped.
LaForge froze on the spot for several seconds, as if completely unaware of his surroundings.   Then he began to look around, as if in taking in the scene for the very first time, although he’d been in chambers hundreds of times.   His face seemed suddenly vacant.
“Yes, Mr. LaForge?” Picard asked.   “Not only that, but…?”
LaForge continued to look around.   He seemed utterly surprised by what he saw.   “Not only that,” he went on, in a tone that didn’t sound like his own, and that was quite unconvincing, “but…but, it’s a really nice day also.”
Picard rose.   “Commander, this is a Galaxy Constitution Starship,” he said sternly.   “We’re on an important mission and you’re giving me weather reports!   Why?”
LaForge looked around again.   Then he said, “Oh boy.”

*

LaForge looked off into empty space, as if he was listening to something coming from there.   “A joke, sir,” he said finally.
“We can do without the humor.”
“Yes, sir.”
“At Warp 7, it will take us approximately 28 hours and 32 minutes and six subplots to arrive at Geldar IV,” Data said.
“Make it so,” Picard ordered.   “You’re all dismissed.”
The senior crew began to depart;   Data approached LaForge.
“Geordi, are you all right?” he asked.
“Who?” LaForge asked.
Data frowned.
LaForge looked away into empty space, as if listening to some imaginary friend.   “Oh!” he said suddenly.   “Oh, of course, Data, I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?” Data asked.
“I’m sure.”
Data nodded and left.
LaForge looked away into empty space again.   “What am I doing here?” he asked nobody in particular.

*

They were back on the bridge.
“Captain,” Worf spoke up, “we are reading some sort of computer anomaly.”
“Another one?”
“What is it?” Riker asked.
“The Enterprise is reading an alternate computer signal.   Unable to lock in on it, sir.”
“With all the new systems which have been incorporated into the Enterprise, Captain,” Data said, “the computer may have developed a schizoid embolism.”
“A schizoid embolism?” Picard was suitably impressed with terminology he had no chance of comprehending.   He opened a connection.   “Engineering;   Mr. LaForge?”
“Who?” LaForge’s voice came back.   “Oh, yes, Captain?”
“We’re reading some sort of alternate computer signal up here.   I want you to run…”
“Yes, sir?”
“A Level 1 Diagnostic.”
“A Level 1, sir?” Riker was impressed.   “Not a Level 2?
“No, a Level 1.”
“We’ve never done one of those before.”
“Yes, sir.   LaForge out.”
“A Level 1 Diagnostic,” Riker said in awe.   He grinned.
“Captain, scanning a derelict ship directly ahead,” Worf said.
“Life signs?”
“One;   very faint.”
“Ensign Ro, take us out of Warp.”
The Enterprise slipped out of Warp.   A small ship suddenly loomed ahead of them.   It certainly looked a derelict;   it was nothing more than a battered shell really.
“Captain, scanning the dissipation of a temporal anomaly,” Data said.
“Dissipation?” Picard frowned.   “You mean we’re not going to run into it?”
“No, sir.   It has just disappeared.”
Riker’s grin broadened.   “A Level 1 Diagnostic, sir,” he said.   “It seems nothing’s going to stand in our way now.”
“Mr. Worf, open a hailing frequency.”
“Hailing frequency open, sir.”
“Derelict vessel, this is Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the U.S.S. Enterprise, please respond.”
“Tell them we’re running a Level 1 Diagnostic, sir,” Riker told him.
Picard frowned at him as the derelict failed to answer.
“No response, sir,” Worf said.
Picard turned on the Klingon.   “We’re in the twenty-fourth century, we’re surrounded by all this advanced technology, they don’t answer and you have to tell me they’re not responding?” he said stiffly.
“Sorry, Captain.”
“Number One,” Picard said, “take an away team to investigate the ship.”
“Captain, may I remind you that we’re on a mission,” Riker said.   “And that we’re running – not a Level 2 – but a Level 1 Diagnostic!”
“Commander Riker, there may be somebody in trouble.   I think that is of paramount importance.   Now, make it so.”
“Yes, sir.   Data, Worf, with me.”
Riker, Data and Worf left the bridge.
Picard turned to Troi.   “Counselor, are you sensing anything?” he asked.
“That I’m every thirteen year old male Star Trek fan’s fantasy?” Troi asked.
“Beside that.”
“No, sir.   The life sign is at peace.   I’m not reading anything from it.”
“Fascinating,” Picard said.

*

“Chief Kelso,” Riker said to the Transporter Chief, “Energize.”
Kelso, who wasn’t even worthy of a line, activated the transporter.
Moments later, Riker, Data and Worf materialized in the derelict ship.   They found themselves in a small chamber which was almost completely bare.
But on a table lay a solitary Borg.
Riker examined it;   it appeared unconscious, but its chest was rising and falling rhythmically.
On another table lay a small metallic box with two slits on the top and a lever on one side.   Data was studying it with his Tricorder.
Everything else in the ship looked completely uninteresting.
“Intriguing,” Data was saying, consulting his Tricorder.   “This metallic box configures with no known technology we have ever encountered before.   Extremely primitive, in itself, and yet fascinating in its construction.   I believe it is some sort of antique from Earth’s past.   It could be of immense sentimental and historical value to Starfleet historians.”
“Mr. Worf, recommendations?” Riker asked.
“That I be beaten up in order to establish just how bad a security officer I am,” Worf suggested.
“You need a girlfriend, Worf,” Riker said.   He opened a connection and told Picard what they’d found.
“What a strange mixture,” Picard’s voice sounded.   “Bring them aboard, Commander, so that we may continue with the main storyline and I can frown and pace some.”
“What are you doing now, sir?”
“I’m frowning while sitting down.”
Data picked up the box.
“Yes, sir.   Transporter Chief Kelso,” Riker said, “four to beam aboard.   Energize.”
Moments later, the derelict ship was empty.

*

In Engineering, Barclay was concerned.   And for once, he wasn’t concerned about himself, although he still retained a wide degree of his own fears.   (One of his worst was that he was afraid of being afraid).   But at the moment, it was Commander LaForge who concerned him.   Barclay watched as LaForge stood in one corner of Engineering and had a conversation with nobody at all.
“But that’s crazy,” LaForge was exclaiming.   And then he stopped, as if he were listening to some unheard response.   “They’re completely incompatible!” LaForge said.   Pause.   “A 92.4% probability?” Pause.   “I think you’re wrong.   Go back and ask Ziggy to check on it again.”
Barclay turned and walked away, resolving to talk to the Captain in the very near future.

*

Picard was looking at the Borg.   “Well, Doctor?” he asked.
“The Borg function primarily on energy,” Crusher said, “which this one seems to be starved of.”
“But how did it get aboard a derelict ship with what Data describes as an Earth antique.”
Data held the box in one hand and up at eye level.   “Captain, I have completed a preliminary study of this box with my Tricorder and I am scanning the existence of primitive positronic pathways supplied by a nominal energy force.”
“But what does that mean?”
“I cannot be certain yet, Captain.   But if I may be permitted to take this box to my quarters and study it further?”
“See to the resumption of our course to Geldar IV, first.”
“Aye, Captain.” Data left with the mysterious box.
“And you, Doctor, enlist the help of Mr. LaForge and attempt to revive the Borg,” Picard said.   “It would be interesting to find out how it managed to get all the way out here.”
“Yes, Captain.”
“Number One.”
Picard and Riker left the Infirmary.

*

Picard and Riker were in the Turbolift.   Picard was concerned.
“I’m concerned,” he said, just to prove he was concerned.
“Concerned?” Riker asked.
Picard nodded.   “Concerned,” he affirmed.
“Concerned about what?”
“I’m concerned about the storyline,” Picard told him.   “It was weak to begin with, and we really haven’t established a strong plot thrust.   Even the sub-plots haven’t come through yet.
“Perhaps we should run a Level 2 Diagnostic on the plots in this story, sir?”
“There’s no need to get carried away, Number One.   The dialogue’s also a concern.   It concerns me how it inane it is.   Kind of like the Original Series first movie.”
The Turbolift opened onto the Bridge and Picard and Riker stepped out.
“Status?” Picard asked, sitting himself down.
“You have just come out of the Turbolift and sat down,” Data said.
Picard frowned.   “Is that an attempt at humor, Mr. Data?”
“Yes, sir.   I apologize.” Data rose and approached Picard.   “I request permission to attend to the mystery of the box now, Captain.”
“Why?” Riker asked.
“Commander, I am unique in all the universe;   I am an android.   I was one of only two of Dr.    Soongh’s creations – and originally I was the only one, but when storylines ran dry Lore came into existence.   – At any rate, for as long as I can remember, I have been alone.   But that box may represent primitive Earth’s culture’s first attempt at the creation of artificial intelligence.   If so, perhaps I am not alone-”
“Yes, yes, permission granted, Data,” Picard said.
“Thank you, Captain.” Data left the Bridge.
“Whine, whine, I am alone,” Picard mimicked.   “Stupid android.   He’s developing a complex.”
“It’s gotten worse since he’s incorporated the emotion chip.”
“Captain, hail from Starfleet,” Worf said.   “They are requesting we rendezvous with a Security Clearance Class A scout vessel to receive a special guest star.”
“Make it so.”
“Yes, Captain.”
Worf left the bridge.

*

The Borg was revived, thanks largely to Barclay.   LaForge seemed to have no idea what he was doing so it was up to Barclay to take the initiative.   The Borg opened his eyes.
“Where am I?” he asked.
“You’re aboard the Federation Starship Enterprise,” Crusher told him.   “We’ve prepared an energy socket for you.”
LaForge looked away suddenly.   “About time!” he exclaimed.
“I’m sorry, Commander,” Barclay said, “but we were working as quickly as we could.”
LaForge turned back from empty space to look at Barclay.   “Oh, sorry.   Just thinking aloud.   I think I’ll…go over there.”
Barclay looked at Crusher.   “Commander LaForge is acting extremely peculiarly,” he said.
“I noticed,” Crusher conceded.   “I think the worst may have happened.”
“You don’t mean-”
“Yes.” Crusher’s tone said it all.   “Another virus!”

*

Worf waited with a security team as the door to the Federation scout vessel banged open and Mister Spock appeared in the doorway.
Worf frowned.   After Admiral Kirk’s death, Spock had rigidly applied further self-discipline to control his emotions.   Now, he stood in the doorway of the shuttlecraft, his face set as if chiseled from stone, his body decked out in black robes.
“Why,” Worf said, “it’s you, Mister Spock.”
“As usual, Klingon, your powers of observation are astonishing,” Spock said, coming down from the scout vessel.   His voice was passionless.   “Take me to your Captain immediately.”
“Follow me,” Worf said gruffly.

*

Barclay came off the Turbolift and onto the Bridge.   He approached Picard.
“Mr. Barclay, can I help you?” Picard asked.
“A moment, sir,” Barclay said, reaching into his ears and pulling out two earplugs.   “We have revived the Borg, sir.”
“You came all the way up here to tell me that?”
“No.   I am also concerned about Commander LaForge, Captain.   He is acting peculiarly.   Doctor Crusher is examining him now.”
“Peculiarly?” Riker said.
“Yes, sir.   Doctor Crusher believes he may be affected with a virus.”
“A virus aboard the Enterprise?” Picard said.   “That would mean it’d be incredibly contagious.”
“Captain, I recommend we self-destruct the ship,” Riker said fearfully.
“Let’s have a talk with Commander LaForge first.”
Picard and Riker rose and started toward the Turbolift.   Barclay stopped them just moments before the doors would have opened for them automatically.
“A moment, sir,” he said, putting in one his earplugs.
“What are you doing, Barclay?” Riker asked.
“I have Sshhnaphobia,” Barclay told them.
“What?” Picard asked.
“A phobia of the sounds the doors on the Enterprise make when they slide open,” Barclay said.   “It drives me into hysterics.   So I need the earplugs so I won’t hear the sound.” He put the other earplug back in.
“An obsession with the holodeck,” Riker said as they got into the Turbolift, “a mortal fear against being transported, and now a phobia about the sounds the doors make – Captain, just how the hell did Barclay get into Starfleet?”
“The same way you did, Commander.   With a goofy grin.”
The rest of the trip was made in silence.

*

Crusher spoke in a secluded corner with Picard and Riker.   “Physically he’s fine, although his mind seems to be radiating strange neural waves,” the Doctor told them.   “And he keeps asking me about the personal lives of Worf and Deanna.”
“Is it some sort of known virus?”
“No.”
“An unknown virus?”
“No, again.”
“How can you tell?” Riker asked.
“I would have been able to recognize a virus I’d never seen before.”
Picard frowned;   then he approached LaForge.   “How’re you feeling, Commander?” he asked.
“Fine.”
“Mr. Data found a box he believes may be a primitive positronic brain.   I want you to assist him in his examination of it;   then I want you to speak with Counselor Troi.”
“Yes, Captain.” LaForge got up and left.
Picard turned to Crusher.   “What about the Borg?” he asked.
“We’ve managed to revive it,” Crusher said.   “Lt. Barclay took it to Engineering.   They’re trying to give it a sense of individuality like they did with the other Borg we once found – Hugh.”
“Have they given this one a name?” Riker asked.
Crusher nodded.   “Bjorn.”
“Carry on.   Number One.”
Picard and Riker left for the Bridge.

*

LaForge entered Data’s quarters.
“What’ve you got, Data?”
Data displayed his box.   “I believe this may be a primitive positronic brain.”
LaForge laughed.   “Data, that’s a toaster.”
“A what?”
“A toaster.   It makes toast.   Watch.   Get me a piece of bread.”
Data synthesized one in the food slot and passed it to LaForge.   LaForge put it in one of the box’s slits and pulled down the lever.   The slits glowed faint orange.   Moments later, the bread popped back up to show it had now become a piece of toast.
“Intriguing,” Data said.   “It seems the box does have some sort of intelligence.”
“But it’s just a toaster.   We used them…I mean Earth people used them back in the twentieth century.”
“But I clearly saw a sign of intelligence;   you asked for a piece of toast and it gave it to you.   Impressive for ancient Earth technology.”
“But that’s its job, Data.”
“Clearly it has fulfilled its programming.”
“But that’s all it…forget it, Data.   I have to speak with Deanna.”
LaForge left, leaving Data to experiment with the toaster.

*

“Captain,” Spock was saying, “Starfleet has instructed me to assist you in your search for Admiral Kirk.”
“Try not to take this personally, Spock,” Riker said, “but we don’t really need your help.   Why does Starfleet think we do?”
“The clause in my contract says they do,” Spock said.   “It demands I be given some screen time.”
“Captain!” Worf said.   “Scanning the approach of a vessel.”
Picard turned to the viewer.
“It’s the Borg, sir!” Worf exclaimed.

*

“Doctor Crusher has told me you have been feeling a sense of confusion lately, Commander,” Troi was saying.   “I can also sense it, although it is unfocused.   Would you care to elaborate?”
LaForge seemed unsure of himself.   “I feel just fine,” he said without conviction.
“And yet…?”
LaForge looked away suddenly and Troi seemed to sense something.
“A problem?” LaForge asked.
“It’s almost as if another presence has entered these quarters,” Troi said, looking around.   “A presence that is having lurid thoughts about me.”
“You’ve got that right,” LaForge said under his breath.
“What was that?” Troi turned to him.
“Nothing.   Tell me Counselor, what do you think about the Wookie?”
“Who?”
“You know, the big guy with the funny head?”
“Worf?”
“Is that his name?” LaForge asked.   He looked away again and seemed to gain sudden conviction.   “Yeah, Worf, Worf, that’s it.   What do you think about him?”
“Worf is a fine officer.   Why do you ask about him?”
“I’ve noticed that just lately…just, recently, he’s been making googoo eyes at you.”
“A Klingon making googoo eyes?” Troi asked skeptically.   She almost laughed.   “I haven’t sensed it in him.   All I’ve sensed in him are his usual aggressive feelings.”
“I’m sure he feels something for you,” LaForge tried to convince her.   “Maybe you should try talking to him.”
“I’ll consider it,” Troi said.   “But at the moment, we’re discussing you.”
LaForge got up.   “I really can’t talk in this formal atmosphere,” he said.   “Maybe if we spoke later, in the bar-”
“Ten Forward?”
“Yeah, Ten Forward.   At twenty hundred hours.”
“Fine,” Troi said, “if you feel that will help you.”
“I think it will help…both of us.”
LaForge left.

*

“The Borg are hailing you, Captain,” Worf said.
“On speakers.”
“Captain Jean-Luc Picard-” the Borg began, but Picard was determined to take the initiative from the outset.
“Borg, we understand the reason behind your arrival,” he said thinking of the Borg they had rescued.
“Understanding is irrelevant,” the Borg said.   “We have arrived to extol demands from you.”
“We will be-”
“We are sick of approaching to threaten vessels and civilizations to be heralded by hopeless theme music,” the Borg said.   “We want something with atmosphere, something motivational, something like the Klingons have in the movies.”
“If-” Picard began again.
“The next time we encounter each other, we will be heralded by theme music to chill your sickly human forms.”
The Borg ship departed.
“You really handled them, sir,” Riker said.
Picard ignored him.
“A fascinating exchange,” Spock said.
“And they didn’t even mention the Borg we have,” Riker said.   “I thought they’d come to demand his return.”
“These subplots are getting out of hand,” Picard said.   “Number One, you have the conn.”
“Where are you going, sir?”
“To frown in my ready-room.”
Picard left.

*

Riker took Spock on a tour of the ship.   Inevitably they ended up in Engineering where Barclay introduced them to their Borg.
“We’re attempting to give him a sense of individuality,” Barclay was saying.   “The Borg are completely-”
“I know about the Borg, Lt.,” Spock said.
“But I’m explaining it for the benefit of the reader who might not know.   Each Borg is part of a conscious whole – the Collective, they call it.   Last time we found a Borg, we managed to give him his own sense of independence and novelty.”
“Borg, identify yourself,” Riker said.
“I am Bjorn,” the Borg said.
While the exchange went on, Guinan watched secretly from a corner.

*

Data continued to experiment with the toaster.   Ultimately, as with all toasters, a piece of bread got stuck and he tried to pry it out with a knife.   There was a flash and a jump of sparks.   Data felt a short thrill go up his arm.
He picked up the toaster, believing he had ruined it.   But a scan with the Tricorder revealed it was still working.
Almost smiling, he took it to Captain Picard.

*

Picard was drumming his fingers on his tabletop when the door-signal chimed and Guinan came in.
“Guinan, what a pleasant surprise,” he said.   “Come in.   Sit down.”
Guinan did so.
“Now, what can I do for you?”
“The Borg you have in Engineering;   I’ve been watching it.”
“We’ve had this discussion before, Guinan.”
“This one’s different, Jean-Luc.   I feel it in him.   He’s a killer.   We have to destroy it.”
“Guinan, you’re being presumptuous.”
“I’m not.   This one’s not just an ordinary Borg;   it’s not a Borg you’d meet on any Borg ship.   It’s a Borg’s Borg, a top of the line Borg, one of the Borgs that originally Borged its way across the Galaxy.   And meanwhile, your Engineering staff are teaching it tricks.   I really feel its different.”
“You’re being ridiculous.”
The door opened and the Borg came in carrying slippers in its mouth and a book in its hand.   Riker and Barclay stood watching in the doorway.
The Borg dropped the slippers at Picard’s feet and put the book on his table.   “For your comfort and relaxation, Captain,” the Borg said and headed for the doorway.
Barclay patted the Borg’s head and Riker gave it a snack.   The door slid close, cutting them off from Picard’s ready-room.
Guinan looked pointedly at Picard as he put his slippers on.
“I still don’t see your point, Guinan,” Picard said innocently.
“Kill it, Jean-Luc.”
“No.   It has a right to exist as does any other living creature.”
Guinan got up and coldly stalked from the room as Data came in carrying his toaster.
“Captain,” Data said, putting the toaster on the table, “I believe I have discovered a new life-form.”
“Then this box is artificially intelligent?”
“It would seem so.   An error on my part saw to an unforeseen power surge which could have destroyed the box.   It may also have destroyed me, if not for the insulation protecting my positronic pathways.   And yet my point is the box showed a sense of self-preservation and protection of itself.   I believe it warrants further study.”
“Make it so, Commander Data.”
Data nodded and left the ready-room with the box in hand, leaving Picard to reflect on having the best crew in Starfleet.

*

When Worf entered Ten Forward he saw Troi sitting alone.   He went up to her;   she looked back at him mysteriously.
“Have you seen Commander LaForge?” the Klingon asked.   “He asked me to meet him here for a drink at twenty hundred hours.”
“He asked me here for the same thing.   Sit down, Worf.”
Worf sat down.
Troi looked at him and probed his mind;   she sensed lust there, but she sensed it from everybody aboard the Enterprise concerning her.   That’s what you got for wearing a tight bodysuit with a low-cut bodice instead of an uniform for four seasons.    But was there more there?   She couldn’t tell.
Violinists suddenly appeared out of nowhere and began to serenade them.   The barman, a nobody of no consequence and no future acting career, rushed over to them and laid a tablecloth on the table, a bunch of roses and two candles.   Then he quickly left.
“This is most peculiar,” Worf said.
Troi didn’t think so.   Was LaForge trying to play the matchmaker?   The answer seemed a certain yes.
“And these musicians are most irritating,” Worf said.   “I would get up and smash their instruments over their heads if it were not for the fact…”
“What, Worf?”
“For the fact one of them would probably beat me up,” Worf finished sheepishly.
Troi rested a comforting hand on Worf’s own.   She looked into his eyes and was struck by the sense of tenderness there;   under the steely glint, the desire to maim, kill and dominate, to destroy and devastate, to pound and hammer, to twist heads off and pull out people’s spines, there was a touch of tenderness.   Troi had never seen it before and was struck by it.
Maybe LaForge had something here.

*

“Well?” LaForge said in his quarters.
Al looked at his handlink.   “They get together,” he said triumphantly.   “You did it, Sam.   Against a ninety-five point six per cent probability of viewer acceptance, you managed to put Worf and Troi together.   Boy, is he in for a good-”
“Al!   Why haven’t I leaped?”
“I don’t know.   It’s just dropped.   There’s a ninety-four per cent chance you should leap- no, it’s dropped again.”
“Are they going to break apart?”
“No, they’re together!   It’s something else, Sam.   Something else is going on.”
“What’s going on?”
“I don’t know!” Al exclaimed.
“Well go back and ask Ziggy why I haven’t leaped.”
Al nodded and disappeared through his portal.

*

“On final approach to Geldar IV,” Data said.
“Exit Warp,” Picard said, “standard orbital approach, preliminary scans of Geldar IV, everybody look self-important.”
Geldar IV was another bloody red planet, but it was marked by areas of striking azure blue.
“Scanning a colony on the far side of the planet, Captain,” Worf said, “and wreckage of an old Starfleet vessel – the Simpson.”
“But the Simpson was lost over two hundred years ago,” Riker said.   “Could it be there were survivors, and they founded a colony?”
“Why do we even bother asking?” Picard asked.   “It seems every time a ship’s lost they’ve founded a colony somewhere.   Do they have communicator ability?”
“Yes, Captain,” Data said.   “And it seems they have already scanned us.”
“Is there any sign of the ship Admiral Kirk was aboard?” Spock asked.   “Or the energy Perplexus Cloud?”
“Nothing as of yet, sir.”
“Interesting,” Picard mused.   “Hail the colony.”
“They are hailing us,” Worf said.
“On viewer.”
A dazzling blonde beauty appeared on the screen.   She wore a simple, revealing toga.   Riker was impressed.   Picard was taken aback.   She looked a bit like Denise Crosby.
“Welcome, travelers,” she said.   “I am Savanna.”
“I am Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the United Federation of Planets.   I immediately wish to inform you that you should not construe our presence here as threatening-”
“But of course, we trust you, Captain Picard.   We once came from the Federation ourselves until we were marooned here.   Since, we have lived in an utopic state.”
“How many of you are there?”
“Several hundred.   We do not concern ourselves with trivialities, Captain.   We live in peace and happiness.   Perhaps you yourself would care to visit us and discuss the reason for your arrival.”
“Of course.   We will arrive shortly.”
“We await your visit.”
The viewer flickered off.
“Counselor, did you sense anything from her?” Picard asked.
“Unsurpassable contentment and happiness.   She was not at all alarmed by our presence.”
“Number One, Data, Spock and Counselor, with me.   Doctor Crusher, meet us in Transporter Room #3.   Mr. Worf, maintain scanners until you find some trace of the Perplexus Cloud.   And until I return, you have the conn.”
“Yes, sir,” Worf said.
Picard led the others to the Transporter room.

*

They materialized in a beautiful glade surrounded by trees.   The glade was filled with straw huts with pointed, thatched roofs.   They were formed in a horseshoe shape, except for one which sat smack right in the middle of them all, and another that rested behind it out of alignment with the others.
The people around them were all dressed in togas;   they were perfect human specimens.   The males were tall and had muscular physiques while the women were alluringly voluptuous.   Every one of them had a mesmerizing smile.
“Hello, Captain,” Savannah greeted them.
Picard inclined his head and proceeded to introduce his away-team.   “It must be a long time since you have seen other humans,” he said when he had finished.
“Yes, of course.   But we have never wanted for anything.   We have been perfectly happy to live here in solitude.   As you see we have founded a small community.” Savannah gestured to the huts.   “We have stores, although we barter instead of use money, and those huts further down there are our dwellings.”
“What about that hut in the middle, and the one behind it?” Riker asked.
“Oh, they’re nothing.   They’re empty.” Savannah directed her gaze at Picard.   “Perhaps you would sup with us and discuss the reason for your arrival?”
“Of course.”
“Follow me.”
Savannah led them away.

*

Picard and the others were brought to one of the larger huts where they sat crosslegged around a short table.   Savannah sat opposite them with two men, one of antiquated years but still with a note of vigor about him, the other younger and rugged looking.
“These are the village leaders, Glar and Jonconore,” Savannah introduced them.
Another man brought a platter bearing a decanter and many earthen mugs.
“A drink?” Savannah asked.
Not wanting to offend them, Picard said, “Thank you.”
The man placed a mug in front of them all and poured in each a red liquid that smelled like wine.   Picard tasted it.   It was delicious.
“We have come in search of a man,” Picard said.
“You are the first strangers to pass through here,” the old man, Glar, said.   “No others have walked through this peaceful community.”
“He was dead, so logic dictates he would not have walked through here,” Spock said.
“We still have not seen him,” the other, Jonconore, said.
“What of an energy cloud?” Spock persisted.   “Have you scanned one?”
“Yes – long ago – but it did not remain.   It appeared to move off beyond the capacity of our sensory array.”
“As to yourselves, we have the means to take you back to Earth,” Picard said.   “We could-”
“We are happy here, Captain,” Savannah said.   “This is now our home.”
Picard’s combadge signaled.   “Excuse me.   Picard here.”
“Captain,” Worf’s voice rumbled, “long range scans have failed to detect the Perplexus Cloud.   But Lt. Barclay believes we can booster sensory emissions further through usage of the deflector dish.”
Picard frowned.   “Make it so.”
“Yes, sir.” Worf paused.   “One more thing, sir.   I would recommend you return to the Enterprise as soon as possible.”
Picard caught the warning in Worf’s voice and rose.   “You must excuse us, Savannah,” he said.
“Of course.   But feel free to return at any time.”
“Thank you.”
The away-team transported back to the Enterprise.

*

They were in chambers.
“One of our bio-technicians,” Worf was saying, “was brutally murdered.   I thought it prudent not to advise you while you were away on the planet, Captain.”
“Who was it?” Picard asked.
“His name was John Connor.   We found him mutilated, as if by a sharp object.”
“Are there any suspects?” Riker asked.
“As we have introduced only two special guests aboard the ship,” Worf said, “I believe it must be one of them.   – Either Mr. Spock, or the Borg.”
“But Mr. Spock was on the away-team,” Troi said, “so it must be the Borg.”
“But the Borg assimilate,” Crusher put in.   “They don’t kill.”
“I will question the Borg shortly,” Picard decided.   “But what about the colony on Geldar IV?   What can we tell about them?   Are they really long lost humans, or some sort of alien?”
“They’re not aliens, sir,” Crusher informed him.
“Your Tricorder tells you that?”
“No, my eyes.   You know all the aliens in this series are identifiable because they have little scars on their faces, Jean-Luc,” Crusher said.   “These people have unblemished faces.”
“But they seem incredibly happy,” Riker said.   “Almost unnaturally so.”
“I sensed great happiness in them,” Troi said.   “They were in an euphoric state.”
“Narcotics?” Spock suggested.
“The Tricorder didn’t reveal a narcotic dependency,” Crusher said.
“Maybe it has something to do with that hut in the middle of their settlement,” Riker said.   “Savannah shied away from it when I questioned her about it.”
“It seems we’ve revealed a greater mystery than the disappearance of Admiral Kirk’s body,” Picard said.   “Can this human colony really exist, without want or need, without pain or care?   Number One, take a small away-team to investigate that hut in the middle of the settlement.   Perhaps something in there can give us a clue to their contented existence.”
“Yes, sir,” Riker said.   “What about you?”
“I’ll have a talk to our Borg.”

*

Riker, Worf and Crusher materialized just outside the center hut at the dead of night.   They wore black to disguise themselves.
“Come on,” Riker said, leading them into the hut.
What they found shocked them all.
The hut was empty.

*

“Assimilation!” Picard exclaimed.   “Assimilate the human race.”
“I do not wish to assimilate the human race,” Bjorn the Borg said.
“Then kill them!”
“I will not kill anybody,” the Borg answered innocently.
“The Borg confronted us.   They didn’t want you back.   Why?”
“I don’t know.”
Picard thought the Borg was lying.

*

“Let’s get out of here,” Riker said after a search of the hut revealed it really was empty.
But suddenly, lights illuminated the doorway and Savannah, Glar and Jonconore stood there.   “What are you doing here?” Savannah asked politely.
Riker was all innocence.   “We just thought we’d come for a look,” he said.   “Since it was so late, we didn’t want to disturb you.”
“You could have asked,” Jonconore said, approaching them – but rather unthreateningly.
“You’re not going to hit me, are you?” Worf asked.
“No.   We do not believe in violence.”
“We’ll just return to our ship, then,” Riker offered, waiting for some objection.
“You could stay the night in our settlement,” Glar said.
“Are you making us stay?” Crusher asked.
“No.   We wouldn’t force you to do anything.”
“Then we’ll go,” Riker said.   “Do you mind?”
“No, of course not,” Jonconore said.   “We’re not intending to hold you against your will.”
“Okay.”
Riker opened a connection and moments later, he and the away-team were back on the Enterprise.   Riker headed straight for Picard’s ready-room, where he found Picard interrogating the Borg.
“Commander?” Picard said.
“The hut was empty,” Riker told him.   “But we were also discovered by Savannah, Glar and Jonconore.”
“You got away?”
“They let us go.”
The Borg looked around without seeming interest.
“They let you go?” Picard said, curious.   “Strange.   A perfect community – happiness, contentment, without want, and when we investigate and they discover us, they let you go.   What are they hiding?”
“I don’t know, sir,” Riker said.   “But consider this.   They live like primitives, but they were able to scan and contact us.   So there must be some technology.”
“Perhaps in another hut?”
“Perhaps.”
“Their behavior is most strange.   We’ll wait, then investigate the hut behind the center hut at oh-four hundred hours.”
“Yes, sir,” Riker nodded and left.
“Borg,” Picard turned back to Bjorn, “did you kill bio-technician John Connor?”
“No.”
“How do I not you’re not lying?”
“You may ask me.”
“Are you lying?”
“No.”
“How do I know you’re not lying about that?” Picard’s combadge signaled and he answered it promptly.   “Picard here.”
“Captain,” Data’s voice sounded, “the Level 1 diagnostic has isolated a temporal frequency.”
“A temporal frequency?”
“Yes.   The alternate computer signal we are reading comes from another time.”
“Can you isolate it any further?”
“No, sir.”
“Who’s receiving the signal?”
“Somebody aboard the ship.”
“Can you isolate who?”
“With time.”
“Make it so.”
“Aye, sir.”
Picard closed the connection and looked at the Borg.   “Ultimately, your people are going to come asking for your return,” he said.   “I am prepared to offer you asylum.”
“I accept.”
“It might start a war,” Picard tried to point out.   “It might cost thousands of lives.”
“I accept your asylum, Captain.”
“The Enterprise could be destroyed in the process of granting you asylum.”
“I maintain my acceptance.”
“We could be killed.”
“I am sure you will do what is necessary, Captain.”
“So you’re staying?”
“Yes.”
Picard frowned.   Guinan was right.   This was a most peculiar Borg.   He just hoped Bjorn wouldn’t get them all killed.

*

Riker, Worf and Crusher materialized by the other hut in the very early hours of the morning.   There was not a sound in the settlement.   Quietly, they entered the hut.
It was empty.
They searched the roof, the floor, the corners, but found nothing.
Light suddenly illuminated the doorway and Savannah, Glar and Jonconore stood there.   “Commander, you have returned,” Savannah said.
“We were interested in how you managed to contact us,” Riker fumbled, “seeing there’s no technology in this settlement.”
“The wreckage of our ship,” Savannah said.   “We’ve kept the computers operational.   As I told you before, these huts are empty.”
“Then why do you keep them here?”
“Because maybe someday somebody will occupy them.”
“Oh.”
“Is there something you’re looking for in particular?” Jonconore asked.
Crusher exchanged a look with Riker then said, “The euphoria which lays over this settlement, is it natural?”
“Of course,” Glar said.   “We’re happy.   We’ve got nothing to complain about.”
“You use no aids in sustaining your happiness and contentment?”
“No, we’re just happy,” Savannah said.
“I think we should return to our ship,” Riker said, then added darkly, “unless you want to stop us?”
“No, why would we stop you?” Savannah asked.
“Just come at a reasonable time next time you visit,” Glar said.
“Ah hah!   So you don’t want us here!” Riker accused.
“Not at four in the morning,” Jonconore said.
“You’re hiding something!” Riker went on.
“No we’re not.   You can look at anything you want,” Savannah said.
Riker was at a loss before offering, “You don’t think we’ll look, do you?   You’re relying on reverse psychology.”
“Feel free to look at anything you want.”
“But not at this time?” Worf put in.
“You’ll awake everybody if you have a look now,” Glar said.
“We’ll just return to our ship then,” Riker said.   He waited for opposition, but Savannah, Glar and Jonconore just watched expectantly.   Riker lifted his hand to his combadge slowly but the others just continued to look at him.   Riker thought he saw Glar move and drew his phaser.   “Freeze, Glar!” he roared.
“But I haven’t moved yet,” Glar protested.
Riker tapped his combadge.   “Transporter Chief, three to beam up,” he said.   “Energize.”
The away-team was taken off Geldar IV.

*

“They’re hiding something, Captain!” Riker exclaimed in chambers.   “They have paradise.   It’s unnatural.   They almost stopped us from leaving.”
“But you got away?” Picard asked.
“Thanks to Commander Riker,” Crusher said.
“What’s overtaken them?” Picard asked.
“Perhaps they intend to capture the Enterprise and spread whatever has overwhelmed them across the galaxy?” Worf suggested.   “Happiness and bliss all over!”
“That could be disastrous,” Picard said.   “Commander Riker, Counselor Troi, Commander Data and LaForge and Doctor Crusher with me.   We’ll just confront them about what they’re doing.   We’ll put a stop to this if it’s the last thing we do.”

*

Picard and the others materialized in the settlement.   Savannah was waiting with Glar, Jonconore and others.   Most had primitive phasers pointed at them.
“So you’re intentions never were friendly,” Picard said.   “You intended to kill us all along.”
“Kill you?” Savannah asked incredulously.   “We didn’t care about you.   We were perfectly happy!   But something had to be wrong with that.   You couldn’t understand why anybody could be so flawlessly happy.   You had to harass and pester us.   You had to believe we were doing something wrong!   Why?”
“You can’t overwhelm us,” Picard said.   “The human spirit won’t be dominated.”
“Dominated?” Savannah screamed.   “We were perfect hosts to you.   We offered to show you whatever you wanted to see.   Don’t you understand?   We were happy and because we were so happy you thought there must be something wrong.   There’s nothing wrong!”
“They’re unstable, Captain,” Crusher said, consulting her Tricorder.
“No doubt a cost of their perfect happiness,” Picard reasoned.
“There was no cost!!!” Savannah wailed.   “We were happy just because we were happy!!!   Nothing else.”
“Let’s kill them!” Glar said.
“Really slow, though,” Jonconore agreed, approaching them.   He took LaForge’s VISOR off his face.   “At least we might learn something from this technology.”
LaForge didn’t fumble around blindly.
“So it’s technology you’re after!” Riker said.
“NO!!!” Savannah screamed.   “We’re just…forget it!”
Quicker than any human, Data disarmed Glar.   In their tussle, a fight ensued as the away-team took the opportunity to leap for the initiative.   Phasers were thrown about and groped for.   LaForge looked on, without his VISOR, not sure whether to get involved or not.
A transporter beam shimmered suddenly and Bjorn the Borg stood there.   He took hold of Picard and pushed a phaser to his neck.   “You will all stop what you are doing,” he said.
Everybody stopped fighting;   LaForge hardly noticed a phaser come to land by his feet as he turned off to stare into empty space.
Bjorn the Borg shimmered and shifted shape;   the Borg was gone now.   In his place stood a blue-uniformed man, lean and hard-muscled, with short dark hair.   “Excuse me,” he said politely, “but are any of you the legal guardian of John Connor?”

*

“That’s what you’re here for, Sam!” Al cried out.   “To stop this!”
“What?”
“Don’t you get it?   When you leaped, you caused a temporal disturbance and this Terminator came out of our time with you,” Al said.   “You haven’t leaped because you’re meant to make sure he doesn’t change future history because he isn’t meant to be here.   You have to destroy it!”
LaForge picked up the phaser which had landed by his feet.   “Don’t move,” he said.
“No, Commander LaForge!” Picard cried out, seeing a VISORless Geordi.
“Commander!” Riker warned.
LaForge fired with perfect accuracy, despite the fact he was meant to be blind.   The Terminator dissipated in a glow of flame.
Picard looked at Laforge, completely astonished.   “Without your VISOR, how could you see where to fire?” he asked.
LaForge grinned and Sam leaped.

*

“Where am I?” LaForge asked.
Picard’s combadge signaled.
“Captain,” Worf’s voice sounded, “a ship is approaching.   It is the Borg!”
“Beam us up.”
“Aye, sir.”
Picard and the away-team returned to the Enterprise.

*

“On viewer,” Picard ordered, approaching the viewscreen.
The Borg ship approached to the theme of Baby Elephant Walk.
“They are hailing you, Captain,” Worf said.
“This is Captain Jean-Luc Picard-” the Captain began.
“Captain Jean-Luc Picard of U.S.S. Enterprise 1701-D, prepare the people below for assimilation,” the Borg said.
“They are still three minutes outside transporter range,” Data told Picard.
“We have to stop them before they reach the planet,” Picard said.   “Number One, take an away-team over and see what you can do to stop the Borg.”
“Aye, sir.   Data, Worf with me.”
“And myself,” Spock put in.
“Mr. Spock-”
“I have a contract to fulfill.”
“Yes, sir,” Riker conceded.
Hardly a minute later, Riker, Spock, Data and Worf were pacing the halls of the Borg ship.   They knew the conventional ways of slowing the Borg down, but no ways of stopping them.   Until…
“Look at this,” Data said, pointing out an interface socket in one of the walls.
“It’s how the Borg get their energy, isn’t it?” Riker asked.
“But each Borg belong to a conscious whole.   Perhaps we can inject some alternate command within the interface.”
“But how do we interface with the computer?” Riker asked.   “And how do we interpret a command through the interface?   We can’t do it.”
“But perhaps I know who can,” Data said.

*

Moments and one request later, Data had his toaster in hand.   He connected it to the computer interface but nothing happened.   The theme of Baby Elephant Walk continued.   “Stop the Borg,” Data told the toaster.
Nothing happened.
“I thought you told the Captain this box was artificially intelligent, Data,” Riker accused.
“I believed it was.   It protected itself when I erred- of course, I need a piece of metal.” Data looked around then decided to use his combadge.
He activated the toaster and dropped the combadge into one of its glowing slits.   There was a flash of sparks and an explosion of bright light.   The Borg ship shuddered.   Data took the toaster up in his arms but he didn’t need a Tricorder to tell him it was dead.   The power surge had killed it.
“It sacrificed itself for us,” Data said.
“Away-team,” Picard’s voice sounded over Riker’s combadge, “we’re scanning the Borg ship is about to self-destruct.   Prepare to transport.”
They transported a moment later.

*

Captain’s Log, Stardate 53101.6,” Picard began, “we have defeated the Borg and completed each subplot.   The settlement upon Geldar IV has been cautioned and noted for its utopic behavior.   Starfleet have been well cautioned against its unwarranted happiness.   And yet…yet…?
“Yet what, Captain?” Riker asked.
“And yet we never completed our initial objective,” Picard said.   “To find Admiral Kirk.”
Riker was grim.   “You do know what that means, don’t you, sir?”
“Yes.   This will never be our own genre while there is any question about Kirk.”
“What do we do, Captain?   What do you suggest?”
“What more can we do?” Picard asked.   “People love Kirk, if only to hate him.”
“Then this will never be our own genre,” Riker said.
“Never is a long time, Number One,” Picard said gravely.
The Enterprise continued forlorn through space.

THE END!!!!!?!!!!!

July 29th, 1994.
Silk.

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Union of Treks III: Degenerations

Union of Treks III: Degenerations
Author: Silk,

Captain’s Personal Log, Stardate 51531.1:
It has been eighteen months since the Enterprise’s last mission.   During that time, the ship has undergone a complete overhaul and redesign.   The majority of the crew have temporarily been re-assigned, leaving me only with Commander Riker, Lt. Commander Data, his new emotion-chip installed, and the bro, Commander LaForge.   Young and snotty Wesley Crusher is at Starfleet Academy.   God knows why.   He already seems to know more about the Enterprise than most of the crew.
And meanwhile, Admiral James T. Kirk, Ambassador Spock, and Doctor Leonard McCoy are on trial for their tampering with the space-time continuum and trying to enter a genre that has so obviously passed them by.

*

The courtroom was filled as the President read out the list of charges.   Kirk, Spock and Bones stood before the President’s podium.   Lt. Commander Worf, having temporarily been reassigned to Spacedock security, stood behind Kirk.   Young Wesley Crusher flanked Worf;   Wesley was going to write a thesis on the trial – How to escape court-martial with just a grin.
“How do you plead?” the President asked, having finished with the charges.
“On behalf of my crewmates, I have been authorized to plead guilty,” Kirk grinned, and the assembled throng muttered their apprehension.   – Kirk had never been authorized to do anything.
“Admiral Kirk, Ambassador Spock and Doctor Leonard McCoy, it is the decision of this court that you all be broken-”
“Yes, yes, I know,” Kirk said, “`and given the duties for which we – and me in particular – have shown an unswerving ability and countless boyish grins.    – The command of a Starship.'”
“I’m sorry,” the President said.   “Our budget won’t allow us to build you a new ship.”
“The command of a present one?” Kirk suggested.
“No commissions are due to expire.”
“The Presidency, then?”
“No, I’m afraid not.”
“A T.J.    Hooker telemovie?” Kirk asked with final hope.
“Don’t push it, fatso.   No.” The President crossed his arms in front of his chest.   “Insubordination, disobeying Starfleet orders and blowing up things and having a fistfight every week might have been all right in your own genre, but it’s not in this one.   Admiral Kirk, it is the decision of this court that the three of you-”
There were the numerous flashes of transporter light then.    About fifteen Romulans suddenly appeared.   With a snarl, Worf leapt at one, missed, and was knocked in the head by a phaser butt.   He slumped to the ground and Romulans took hold of him.   Other Romulans quickly took hold of Kirk.
Then, for no apparent reason at all and without warning, another Romulan fired at Wesley and vaporized him.   No, actually, that didn’t happen.   I was just lying.   The Romulan put the phaser under Wesley’s chin and took him hostage.
Cries sounded throughout the assembled peoples.
The lead Romulan took a step forward and to gain the attention of the crowd fired his phaser into the ceiling.   The phaser, however, was on maximum setting, achieving nothing other than putting a hole in the roof.
“Silence!” he called.   “Silence, or the young lad dies.” He pointed at Wesley.
The sudden noise was horrendous.
“Okay, then,” the Romulan said.   “Silence or we don’t kill him.”
A pin dropping could have been heard in the resultant quiet.
“What is the meaning of this?” the President demanded.   “As you know the High Council-”
“Bah!” the Romulan spat, phlegm landing splat right in the middle of Wesley’s face.   “We are here to take Kirk!”
“If this has anything to do with Kirk’s prior wrong-doings against the Romulan race,” the President said, “then I can assure you, he is about to be rightly punished.”
“You mistake our intentions, Mr. President,” the Romulan said.   “We will take the Klingon, too, to provide us with amusement for our long trip back and continued sub-plot.   And the boy.   We have heard of his genius.”
“Romulan,” Spock said.
“Yes?”
“Nothing.   I just hadn’t had a line for a while.”
“Goddamnit, Spock!” McCoy cried.   “Is that all you care about, whether you get a line or not?   We’re talking about Jim’s life here and his wellbeing-”
For the first time since they’d arrived, the lead Romulan noticed McCoy.   “Hey, Bones,” he said with familiarity, “we left that case of Romulan ale in your quarters.”
McCoy lowered his head sheepishly.
The lead Romulan turned back to the President.   “And don’t try to follow us because…because…because we have a cloaked ship and we’re invisible.   So there!”
Transporter light filled the chamber once more;   when it faded, the Romulans, Kirk, Worf and Wesley were gone.

*

Picard was sitting in the center-seat, his eyes on the viewer.    The viewer presented an aft angle of Spacedock;   over ten other starships were being refitted or overhauled.   It was quite a pretty sight and he was really admiring it when the signal chimed to tell him he was being hailed.
He opened a connection.   The viewer suddenly showed a skeleton in a Starfleet admiral’s uniform.   Quite ostensibly, a hand could be seen snaking into the rear of the skull to operate the jaw and mouth when the skeleton talked.
Picard shook his head in disgust.   He couldn’t believe how many times Admiral Nogura had been forced out of retirement.
“Captain Picard,” the skeleton said, but the voice came from elsewhere out of range of the viewer’s capacity, “a sudden crisis has arisen.   Admiral Kirk, Lt. Commander Worf and Ensign Wesley Crusher have just been kidnapped by Romulans.”
“What?” Picard exclaimed.   “Whatever for?”
“The Romulans’ reasons are, at present, unfathomable, Captain.    But Starfleet is faced with a sudden dilemma.   It’s not common knowledge, but the Romulan government has been embroiled in civil turmoil for the last twenty-four months.”
“Civil turmoil?”
“Yes.   Bring your First and Second Officers and we’ll discuss this immediately.   Some things are better discussed at a later date.”
“You’re afraid this frequency is not secure?” Picard asked.
“No, my hand is getting tired,” said the would-be Nogura.
The transmission ended.

*

Admiral Nogura was not present at the next meeting.   Instead, Picard, Riker and Data met with Admiral Benson, Admiral Hicks and the President.   Spock and McCoy were also there.   They sat at a polished charcoal-glass table with these really nifty things sticking out from the surface which served no purpose other than to stick out and look nifty.   They gave the table a futuristic look.
“The Romulan government has been embroiled in civil turmoil for the last twenty-four months, gentlemen,” Admiral Benson said.   “A predominant amount of Romulans have leaned toward possible Romulan/Vulcan reunification and, potentially, peace between the Romulans and the Federation.”
“Peace?” Riker asked, shocked.
Data suddenly burst into hysterical sobbing.   They all looked at him and he said, “Pardon me, but I am attempting to master the emotions available in my new emotion chip.   I am presently feeling sorrow for the demise of the Romulan government.”
“Try to contain yourself, Data,” Picard told him.
“Are you talking to me?” Data asked angrily.
“Yes, Data-”
“Are you talking to me?”
“Data-”
“Well you must be talking to me;   I am-”
“Data!”
“Yes, sir.”
“Ambassador Spock, who was put on trial today as merely a smokescreen,” Hicks resumed his story, “has been negotiating with the Romulan President for the last eighteen months for peace.   That’s why the Enterprise was brought in.   She was to be refitted and overhauled so she could rendezvous with the Romulans in tiptop condition.”
“Meet the Romulans?” Picard asked.
“Yes.   You, Captain Picard, are to escort the Romulan representatives back here to negotiate with myself for peace between our two governments,” the President said.
“But they’ve already done this storyline,” Riker protested, pointing at Spock and McCoy, “except they did it with Klingons.”
“But they never had the twist of Admiral Kirk and the others being kidnapped,” Benson pointed out.   “We believe a small group of extremist anti-peace Romulans perpetrated the act to sabotage the negotiations.   They may try again in some other way, like ambushing your ship, killing the Romulan representatives, or even by threatening to keep young Wesley Crusher alive.”
“However, the negotiations will go ahead,” the President vowed.   “After all, Kirk’s retired, Wesley can easily be killed by one of our spies, and Worf’s is a security officer.   It’s about time he was killed.”
“Do you expect me to sacrifice one my crew as easily as that?” Picard asked.
Benson, Hicks and the President looked at one other somberly.   “Sure,” Hicks said.
“With all due respect, sir,” Data said, “but the completion of the Enterprise‘s redesign and overhaul was not expected for another six months.” He laughed again.
“Mr. Data’s right,” Picard said.   “The ship’s in barely serviceable condition and we have only a skeleton crew.   Just about everybody’s been reassigned.”
“The ship’s problems will have to be solved en route,” Benson said.   “As for the crew, fifteen per cent of them have been recalled – just the major characters really, and a few unknowns to kill off during the journey.”
“There must be other ships?” Riker asked.
“The Enterprise is closest to the Romulan rendezvous point.”
“But there’s ten other ships in Spacedock!” Picard protested.
“Yes, but they’re all docked behind you, making you closer.   I’m sorry, Captain, our decision is final.   Ambassador Spock and Doctor McCoy will accompany you.” Benson rose.   “This meeting is at an end.”
Hicks and the President rose also and followed Benson out, leaving Picard and the others to stare at each other in perplexity.

*

Kirk was being dragged down a gleaming corridor by two Romulans and a tractor beam.   The leader of the party which had kidnapped him was bringing up the rear.   Worf and Wesley had been whisked off to some unknown destination by the others.
Ultimately, Kirk was brought to a small and dark chamber and strapped into an iron chair.   The tractor beam was shut off and the two Romulans quietly departed, leaving Kirk with the leader.
“What’s the meaning of this?” Kirk demanded.   “Who are you?”
“My name is Andiom,” the Romulan told him.   “All things will be explained shortly.”
Kirk waited impatiently.   He heard the door behind him slide open and another Romulan appeared, this one a woman.   If Kirk was Picard, or even Spock, he would have recognized her immediately, but he wasn’t and so she had to introduce herself.
“My name is Sela,” she told him.
“What’s going on?” Kirk exclaimed.   “What’s the meaning of this?”
“Let me explain our situation, Kirk,” Sela said.   “We Romulans have tremendous Warbirds, savage disruptor weaponry and an impenetrable cloaking device.   Yet time and time again, we are defeated by Federation vessels.   Why?”
“Because you have really bad Captains?” Kirk suggested.
“Exactly!   Right now, factions of our Government have decided that if we can’t defeat the Federation, we should make our peace with them.   I’m not overly impressed with the idea, so we’ve decided to go with the bogus Paramount script.”
Kirk frowned as Andiom’s face appeared right in front of his.
“We’ve decided to take an outsider,” the Romulan told him, “- a man with vision, with strength, with stunning military and tactical genius, a man who will not accept defeat and will fight to the very end, and make him our leader!   This is such a man we need.” Andiom withdrew.
“Unfortunately,” Sela said, “Hulk Hogan was not available, so we’ve settled on you, Kirk – probably the luckiest tubbiest bastard in the galaxy.”
“I’ll never command your forces,” Kirk said.
“Not to fear,” Sela said.   “We have effective brainwashing techniques.”
She clapped her hands and two Romulans wheeled in a strange contraption with a conical helmet, a visor and electrodes hanging off it.   Andiom strapped the helmet to Kirk’s head and connected the electrodes to various areas of his face.   Lastly, he placed the visor over Kirk’s eyes.
“This machine will show you such horrors as you have never known, Kirk,” Sela told him.   “The electrodes will send electromagnetic impulses into your brain, weakening your will and softening your resolve until you agree to serve us.”
Sela turned the machine on.
She and Andiom looked at each other.   “It will be little more than an hour now,” she said.

*

The Enterprise was en route to rendezvous with the Romulan Warbird carrying the representatives which would meet with the President.   The Bridge felt strangely empty.
To be sure, Data and Ro were at Helm and Nav, and Troi sat alongside Picard, but Riker – as the only qualified officer – had to man tactical.   Spock sat on the other side of Picard.
“Captain,” Riker said, “Romulan Warbird decloaking.”
Picard didn’t need to be told.   The Warbird appeared directly on the viewer.   Picard gave the order to come to a full stop, then, “Open a hailing frequency, Number One.”
“Hailing frequency open.”
A Romulan appeared on the screen.   “Captain Picard, Ambassador Spock, I am Centurion Preax.   Greetings.”
Picard was wary.   “Centurion Preax, greetings,” he said with the utmost courtesy, “I am Captain Jean-Luc Picard.   We have been instructed to escort you back to Federation Spacedock.”
“Captain Picard,” Preax said, “may our journey be free of incident.”
“A Vulcan saying, isn’t it?”
“Such is the way toward peace.”
Picard nodded.   “Perhaps yourself and your officers would care to join us tonight for supper?” he asked.   “The beginning of peace?”
“Of course.”
“1900 hours?”
“1900 hours,” Preax confirmed.   “Until then.”
The transmission ended.

*

Sela wasn’t too happy.   Her face showed it.   Of the wide variety of expressions she showed, she now showed that she wasn’t too happy.
“This isn’t working,” Andiom said.
She didn’t need to be told that.   One look at Kirk’s face told her that her brainwashing techniques weren’t working.
“This is great,” Kirk laughed at the viewing.
“Fantastic,” Sela said.   “Incomparable suffering, untold anguish and he’s laughing.”
“He’s done worse in his career than he’s seeing,” Andiom told her.
“Leave,” Sela said.
“Ma’am?”
“Leave!”
Andiom left quickly.
Sela ripped the head-gear off Kirk.   Then she ripped her skirt off, standing naked from waist-down in front of Kirk.   Kirk didn’t look very appreciative.   Sela straddled herself upon Kirk’s bound body.
“I can promise you untold pleasure,” Sela said, gyrating herself upon Kirk’s crotch.
“I deserve untold pleasure,” Kirk said.
Sela smiled.   “But only if you serve us,” she told him.
“Never.”
“Think of the possibilities.”
“I’ve conquered every possibility scriptwriters have offered me.   I am the greatest.”
Sela undid Kirk’s uniform.   Kirk, being Kirk, was immediately attentive.
Sela impaled herself upon him.   She let out a great moan.   It was heard all over the ship.   Kirk was obviously more than reputation alone.    But nevertheless, he was placid.   He’d been here.   He’d done that.   He was cool.   He was ultimately macho.
For he was Kirk.

*

Picard sat at dinner with the Romulan representative, Centurion Preax.   Spock, McCoy, Riker, Data, LaForge, Crusher and Ro sat with them.   Troi wasn’t there because her abilities might impede the storyline.   Preax had several bodyguards with him, as well as his gorgeously beautiful daughter, Pria, who has no role in this story other than to suggest she might provide a romantic link to someone.   She doesn’t, though.   – Sorry.
Worf and Wesley watched the scene upon a viewer in their detention cell.   They were strapped down to iron chairs.   Andiom stood behind them.   Quite loudly, through the walls of the cell, Kirk’s and Sela’s depredations could be heard.
“As you can see,” Andiom said smugly, “we Romulans are making extraordinary technological advances.   See here how we can tap into the Enterprise‘s flight recorder.”
“That’s actually Camera #3, sir-” Wesley began.
Andiom clobbered him over the head.   “Shut up!”
“Yes, sir.”
“You are a coward, Romulan,” Worf said, “to backhand a weaselly boy.   A forehand would be much more suitable.”
“Careful, Klingon, or I’ll have your head.”
“You do not scare a Klingon of true honor and pride.”
Andiom said nothing and they returned their attention to the viewer.
“Despite our prior misadventures,” Picard was saying, “I can only hope for peace between our two cultures.”
“But of course,” Preax said.   “As the Klingon poet said, To be or not to be.   We wish to be.”
“You are a student of poetry?” Crusher asked.
“Yes,” Preax said.   “Especially of the greats.”
“Romulan greats?” Picard asked.
“Of all cultures!” Preax exclaimed expansively.   “Truly, you have not experienced Dr.    Suess until you have read him in the original Romulan.”
“Really?” Picard said politely.   Then he noticed something quite peculiar, something he had never seen the like of before.
Data was picking his nose.   And he just wasn’t picking it, he was really getting his finger in there, burying it to the knuckle.   Quite outraged, Picard forgot about his guests.
“Excuse me, Mr. Data,” he said tersely, “but are you picking your nose?”
“Yes, sir.   I am endeavoring to experience every emotion available.   To be caught picking my nose at a state event would provide me with utter humiliation,” Data explained.
Andiom laughed.   “What a fool the android is!” he exclaimed.   “Picking his nose!   How inferior Starfleet officers are.”
“You are wrong, Romulan,” Worf rumbled, then said with pride, “You have not picked your nose until you have picked it like a true Klingon.”
“You are a fool, Klingon.   We Romulans can pick our noses with far more efficiency and skill than Klingons could ever master.”
Worf said nothing and he looked back at the viewer.
“Stop it, Data,” Picard admonished the android.
“Aye, sir.” Data elicited his finger from his nostril and wiped it on the sleeve of Centurion Preax.”
Andiom laughed once more.   “Peace!” he exclaimed.   “Little do you all know,” he said.

*

Sela rose from Kirk and took her skirt from the floor.   “Will you change your mind now?” she asked breathlessly.
“No, I won’t change my mind.   I’ll change my underwear, but I won’t change my mind.”
Sela put her skirt back on.   “Your stubbornness is irrational, Kirk.   I did not wish to break your mind like this, but there is no other choice.”
Sela clapped her hands and two Romulans wheeled in a large viewer with two data-disks on top of it.   Sela took one of the disks and held it up in front of Kirk’s face.   “This disk contains every millisecond of every minute of every Next Gen Episode.   Do you know what that means, Kirk?   No unnecessary fistfights!   No unnecessary blowing up of anything that got in the way.”
“It does not frighten me,” Kirk said, although tremulously.
“These episodes also don’t focus on the Captain alone;   they focus on an ensemble of people – bit players, like Barclay!”
“Have you no mercy?” Kirk wavered.
Sela inserted the disc into the viewer.   “The second disk contains episodes of your unwarranted and really badly choreographed barbarity,” she told him.   “Classic Trek, they call it.   Classically bad, I think.”
Sela engaged the viewer.   “Enjoy, Kirk, for now I show no more mercy.”
She left the chamber and Kirk was left to watch Next Gen.

*

The Romulans had returned to their own ship.   Following the Enterprise, the two ships began their way back to Spacedock.
Picard and the others were back on the bridge.   Picard was engaged in a conversation with Riker.   Troi was back in her own seat now that her abilities couldn’t impede the storyline.
“What did you think of the Romulans, Number One?” Picard asked.
“Quite enigmatic.   Ambassador Preax is-”
The Enterprise shook suddenly.
“What was that?” Picard asked.
“We have just experienced a temporal distortion,” Data told him.
“Distortion?”
“Yes.   Directly ahead.”
“Full stop,” Riker called out his token order.
“Full stop,” Ro obliged.
“A temporal disruption has emerged directly twenty thousand kilometers ahead of us,” Data told them.   “It is not listed in Starfleet records.   It appears we have discovered a spatial anomaly, Captain.”
Picard swore under his breath.   “Of all the infinity of space, of which comparatively the Enterprise is just a pinprick, why do we have to run into these spatial anomalies every third week!” he cursed.   “Is there any normal space in this show?”
“Are we in any danger?” Riker asked.
“The disruption is emanating with waves we have naturally never seen before,” Data said.   “They are intensifying with each moment.   We may be in trouble, sir.    I believe Starfleet regulations insist that we investigate and analyze the phenomena.”
Picard regarded Data.   Now that the android had the emotion-chip installed he wasn’t as predictable as he used to be.   “Number One, inform the Romulans about what’s going on.”
“Aye, sir,” Riker said, making his way to Tactical.
“The distortion is expanding slowly, Captain,” Data said.
“Are we in any danger?”
“Not presently.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Picard shuddered, suddenly feeling a moment of déjà   vu.   He took a breath before asking, “Have we had this conversation before?”
“I believe not, sir,” Data said.
“Then-” Picard said
said
said
said
said
said
%*&(&(*!#$$#(*#@&$%^^#%@&*^@(*^$(*&*@*(#*$*(#$*@#$(#$@*$%*

The author apologizes for this break in transmission, but he has suddenly run out of ideas.

*&#$*

While the author attempts to conjure some sort of story out of this mess, please enjoy, for your reading pleasure, Paramount’s promo for their exciting replacement for Star Trek:   the Next Generation.

*%

{imagine, if you will, the theme music for Star Trek:   the Motion Picture, the orchestra in all their resplendent glory}

{voiceover}: Now, all new from Paramount:   KLINGON TREK!

A new crew, a new ship, now experience the exciting all new adventures of the Klingon Battlecruiser Ptzagh.

{Picture a Klingon bridge}.

{voiceover}: Experience the excitement of Klingon discovery.

“Captain,” a Klingon with pointed ears said, “we are reading an unknown entity off the starboard bow.”
“On screen.”
A strange, luminous shape as large as the Battlecruiser itself appeared.
“It’s some sort of life-form,” the first Klingon said, “the like of which we’ve never seen before.”
“Astounding,” the Captain said.   “Gunner, target photons and fire at will!”
“Aye, sir.” The Gunner fired the photons, absolutely obliterating the new life-form.

{voiceover}: Experience the compassion of the Klingon heart.

“Captain,” the Klingon with pointed ears said, “we are receiving distress calls from the planet below.”
“On screen,” the Captain ordered.
The viewer showed the planet at close range with nuclear explosions ravaging its surface.
“They are using primitive 15 megaton nuclear devices,” the Klingon with the pointed ears said.
“How sad,” the Captain said.   “They are not weapons.   Gunner, all photons, fire!”
The Gunner enveloped the planet in a complete photon spread, killing every life form that once lived on it.

{voiceover}: With Captain Klarg, a Klingon of unique Klingonness.
{picture Klingon of immense stature standing over his center-seat, one arm outstretched dramatically}
“To destroy with phasers or photons, that is the question,” Klarg said.

{voiceover}: His First Officer, Shlock, half Klingon half Vulcan.
{picture pointy-eared Klingon with high brows addressing a junior Klingon officer}
“As part Klingon, I am inclined toward incredible violence and barbarity,” Shlock was telling the junior officer.   “But as part Vulcan, I have learned to-”
“Shlock, all you do is talk, talk-” the junior officer began but was cut off by a vicious backhander from Shlock, which sent him sprawling.
“But as part Vulcan, I have learnt to discipline my natural Klingon tendencies,” Shlock finished.

{voiceover}: Gunner Lagortz, a Klingon with unique vision.
{picture Klingon with blonde hair, a flower behind his ears and his dark eyes glazed and vacant}
“Whoa, man,” Lagortz said absently, “the colors.”

{voiceover}: Doctor Frusher.
{picture attractive female Klingon addressing Captain Klarg}
“Captain, a virus has infected the ship,” Frusher said.   “Every crew member has it.”
“What do you recommend, Doctor?” Klarg asked.
“Mass suicide.”
“But it’s only a cold,” Klarg pointed out.

{voiceover}: Her brilliant son, Pexly.
{picture young Klingon bent over in his studies.   His mother, Frusher, stands over him}
“Pexly, what are you doing?” Frusher asked.
“My studies, mummy-tummy-dearest.”
Frusher grabbed Pexly by the ear and hoisted him up to his feet.   “Forget your studies!” she exclaimed.   “Go out there – maim, kill!”
Frusher threw him out the door.

{voiceover}: John Smith, the human Chief of Security.
{picture sickly looking human being jumped by five Klingons}

{voiceover}: And Counselor Shoi, a woman with unique abilities.
{picture attractive Klingon female addressing Captain Klarg}
“Captain, I sense great anger and unremitting hostility boiling within you,” Shoi said.
“What are you saying, Counselor?”
“You are all right.”

{voiceover}: All new adventures, all new excitement on KLINGON TREK!

{picture a Klingon Battlecruiser warping off into space}

{theme music fades off}

&*!&#*

#

{The author apologizes for the break in transmission and will now resume Union of Treks III:   Degenerations!}

The Enterprise shook suddenly.
“What was that?” Picard asked.
“We have just experienced a temporal distortion,” Data told him.
“Distortion?”
“Yes.   Directly ahead.”
“Full stop,” Riker called out his token order.
“Full stop,” Ro obliged.
“A temporal disruption has emerged directly twenty thousand kilometers ahead of us,” Data told them.   “It is not listed in Starfleet records.   It appears we have discovered a spatial anomaly, Captain.”
Picard swore under his breath.   “Of all the infinity of space, of which comparatively the Enterprise is just a pinprick, why do we have to run into these spatial anomalies every third week!” he cursed.   “Is there any normal space in this show?”
“Are we in any danger?” Riker asked.
“The disruption is emanating with waves we have naturally never seen before,” Data said.   “They are intensifying with each moment.   We may be in trouble, sir.    I believe Starfleet regulations insist that we investigate and analyze the phenomena.”
Picard regarded Data.   Now that the android had the emotion-chip installed he wasn’t as predictable as he used to be.   “Number One, inform the Romulans about what’s going on.”
“Aye, sir,” Riker said, making his way to Tactical.
“The distortion is expanding slowly, Captain,” Data said.
“Are we in any danger?”
“Not presently.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Picard shuddered, suddenly feeling a moment of déjà   vu.   He took a breath before asking, “Have we had this conversation before?”
“I believe we have, sir,” Data said.
“Then time is repeating itself,” Picard said.
“Yes, sir.” Data consulted his sensors.   “The disruptions are intensifying, Captain.   I believe we will continue to experience moments when time repeats itself.   Ultimately, we will be caught in one endless loop.”
Picard looked thoughtful.   He was just realizing that after seven seasons, he hadn’t the faintest idea what anybody on this ship was talking about.   He turned to Riker.   “Recommendations, Number One?” he asked.
Riker rose to his full height.   “I’ll take the main characters down below for a few hands of poker,” he suggested.   “It seems the thing we’re always doing during serious crises.”
“Make it so,” Picard agreed.   He understood that.
“Sir,” Spock spoke up, “if you would permit myself and Mister Data to continue studying the temporal phenomena…?”
Picard nodded.   “If you discover anything, I’ll be in my ready-room.” He walked off.

*

It had only taken a few episodes of Next Gen to get Kirk’s blood boiling.   No fistfights?   All focus not centered on the Captain?   Just what the hell was this genre about?   No.   Something would have to be done.
Kirk rose, not thoroughly brainwashed but quite thoroughly pissed off.   Sela and Andiom were with him.   They bowed low and stayed like that as Kirk rose.
“I will lead us to a great triumph as only I can lead,” Kirk said conceitedly.   He spoke low and slow and menacing now.   “We will destroy Starfleet and the Next Gen.”
Sela rose slowly and clapped her hands.   A Romulan entered bearing flowing, pitch-black robes with hood attached in his hands.   He passed it to Sela, who passed it to Kirk.   “The traditional attire of our Emperor,” she explained.
Kirk put it on, then pulled the hood low over his face – a face which now showed unremitting hostility.   “I will need a bodyguard,” he said, “a warrior.   Bring the Klingon to me.”
“To use a Klingon-” Andiom began to protest.   Kirk glanced at him briefly and Andiom cowered away.   Andiom nodded hurriedly.   “The Klingon will be brought to you.” He fled.
Sela smiled seductively.   “And we have more surprises for you, Emperor,” she purred.
Kirk looked at her.
Then smiled back.

*

McCoy was outrageously boisterous during poker.   He’d been drinking Romulan ale since the first hand.   They had now played twelve hands, of which Troi and LaForge had won six each.   McCoy didn’t like it, and had no qualms about complaining.
“They’re cheating!” he protested.
“Doctor,” Riker tried to calm him, “they wouldn’t cheat.   There’s no way of cheating.   The cards aren’t marked-”
“My God, man,” McCoy said dramatically, “LaForge is wearing a VISOR and the Counselor’s an empath.   That VISOR can probably see right through the cards.”
“I assure you, Doctor, my VISOR doesn’t have an x-ray capability,” LaForge said.   “It has everything else, but not that.”
“What about her, then?” McCoy pointed at Troi.   “She’s an empath.   She can sense whether we’re bluffing or not.   She can read our emotions!”
“Hey,” Riker realized, “I’d never thought about that.”
“And how can we play for chips?   We don’t use money in this century.   How can we play for the value of something we’ve never known?”
“You have a better suggestion, Doctor?” Crusher asked.
“Yeah;   let’s play strip poker!”
“What?”
“I feel like playing strip poker!”
Riker regarded him;   McCoy was sweating and seemed quite amorous.   When he looked around the table, it seemed Troi and LaForge and Ro appeared to be the same.
Something was going on.

*

Worf was dragged before Kirk and forced to his knees.   Worf struggled before his Romulan captors but was held down easily.   Kirk looked him right in the eye.
“You are a Klingon and you are a warrior,” Kirk said.   “Your abilities are wasted in this genre.   Join me and we will show this genre what a true warrior is.”
“I will not be a traitor!” Worf rumbled.   “I am a Starfleet officer.   And I have a pony-tail.”
“Then I will have to convince you otherwise,” Kirk said.
He put the Classic Trek disk into the viewer and forced Worf to watch.
Worf howled.

*

The signal to Picard’s ready-room chimed and at his beckoning, Data and Spock entered.
“Yes?   What is it?” Picard asked.
“Mr. Spock and I have discovered something, Captain,” Data said.   “We believe it may be the cause of the temporal rift.”
“What is it?”
“A smachyon beam, directed from the Romulan ship and concentrated intensely into one pinpoint of space,” Spock told him.   “We believe it may have caused the temporal disruption.”
Picard rose in disbelief.   “A smachyon beam?” he asked.
“Yes, sir,” Data confirmed.   “It is like a tachyon beam but with a lot more smack.”
“You’re making that up,” Picard accused him.
“I am not, sir.”
“But what could the Romulans hope to achieve by causing a temporal rift?”
“We must consider the circumstances logically, Captain,” Spock said.   “We were returning to Spacedock.   The rift compels us, under Starfleet regulations, to investigate.”
“You believe the Romulans are trying to delay us for some reason?”
“Yes, sir.”
The door signal chimed again and Crusher came in looking quite mussed, her face sweaty.   “Captain, I have some bad news,” she said immediately.   “There’s a virus aboard the ship.”
“Another one?” Picard asked.   “If it’s not a spatial anomaly it’s a virus.   Now we have both.”
“What sort of virus, Doctor?” Spock asked.
“It induces partial delirium and causes sexual aggression,” Crusher explained.   “I’m already partly affected.   Doctor McCoy, Geordi, Ro and Troi also have it.   Troi’s suffering seriously.   She’s moaning violently.”
“Are you sure she’s not just sensing something?” Picard asked.
“Yes, sir.”
“But how did the virus get aboard-” Picard faltered, then realized, “The Romulans!   But why would they want to delay us!   That’s the question!”
“I suggest, Captain, we endeavor to find out,” Spock said.
Picard nodded and left for the bridge.   Spock followed and Data was about to do the same when Crusher took his wrist and held him back.
“I find you incredibly attractive, Data,” Crusher said amorously.
“I do too, Doctor,” Data said.
“You find me attractive?”
“No.   I find myself attractive.   My new emotion chip has allowed me immodesty.   Excuse me, Doctor.”
Data left for the bridge.

*

The Warbird carrying Kirk and company had been travelling steadily at Warp 8 for over an hour.   That had given the transformed Kirk more than enough time to brainwash Worf, to regress the Klingon to adhere to his more dominant, primal instincts.   The Classic Trek had really done the trick.
“Will you follow me now, Worf?” Kirk asked.
Worf nodded and rose slowly.   “I will, Emperor.”
“Together we will dominate the galaxy.”
A Romulan woman entered and approached Sela;   Kirk thought he should know her, but didn’t.   She spoke softly with Sela, Sela smiling broadly at the information she was receiving.
“We have arrived,” she told Kirk.
“Arrived where?” Kirk had noticed the Warbird had exited Warp space.
Sela directed Kirk’s attention to a viewer.   It showed, empty, stationery space.   The Warbird had come to a full-stop.
Suddenly, cloaked Warbirds began to materialize – over forty of them.
Then, directly in the center of them another ship materialized.   It looked almost like a Warbird, but was bigger.   It was almost green like a Warbird, but greener.    It’s warp engines were like a Warbird’s warp engines, but warpier.   And it’s armory was impressive.
“Our new super-weapon,” Sela said.   “The Wardodo.   Built especially for you to command, Emperor Kirk.   With this fleet, we will destroy Starfleet and the Federation once and for all.”
Kirk smiled.   “I will build a dynasty.   I will conquer the galaxy and build a great dynasty.   But I need an heir.”
“There will be no shortage of applicants, I assure you,” Sela promised.
“Yes, I believe that, but I need somebody now,” Kirk said.   He smiled.   “Bring me Wesley Crusher.”
The Romulan woman who had brought Sela the news of the rendezvous with the fleet blanched.   She left the chamber and surreptitiously made her way to a small, hidden room in which she had stored a mass of communications’ equipment.
She opened a signal.   “This is Saavik to Starfleet,” she said, “come in Starfleet.   This is Saavik to Starfleet, come in Starfleet!”

*

The Enterprise was booming with decadence.   Crew members were unashamedly fornicating in the hallways and at their posts.   Picard was concerned;   he was starting to feel amorous also.   As he sat in his center-seat, sweat poured down his face.   Riker looked at him.   Of all people, Riker was unaffected.
“Hail coming in from Starfleet,” Ro said.
“On screen,” Picard said breathlessly.
Admiral Benson appeared on the viewer.   “We’ve just had some bad news, Captain Picard,” he said.
“Howard the Duck’s going to become part of my crew?” Picard asked.
“No.   The Romulan extremist faction are massing a fleet.    We’ve heard news from one of our spies.   They plan to attack – with Admiral Kirk directing the attack!”
That was enough to shake Picard into some semblance of sobriety.   “His military genius and unnatural luck might just be enough to give the Romulans victory over us once and for all.”
“Correct.   We’re massing our own fleet.   They will rendezvous with you in three hours.   The Romulan delegation with you will be escorted back to Spacedock by another ship.   You, Captain Picard, will lead our fleet into battle.   They have the co-ordinates to intercept the Romulan fleet.” Benson smiled.   “Good luck.”
The transmission ended.
“Why didn’t you tell him about the virus, Captain?” Riker asked.
Picard suddenly bolted from the chamber.

*

Kirk, Worf hovering over him as a bodyguard, and Sela were in the superbridge of the new Wardodo.   It was an immense chamber with a throne-like center-seat situated on a dais at the top of twenty steps.   The center-seat was enveloped by a huge viewer.   In fact, the whole chamber seemed to be made up of viewers.   In the center of the chamber was a ventilation shaft, a huge, bottomless hole about fifteen feet in diameter.
There was no crew in the superbridge.   They had their own bridge.   But Kirk could direct them from the superbridge, and that was what he did, giving the order for the fleet to proceed toward Earth and the attack formations for when they encountered the Federation’s fleet.
That was when Wesley was dragged into the chamber by Andiom and brought to the foot of the stairs.   Wesley was struggling, but when he saw Kirk and Worf he stopped and looked up at them with hope in his eyes.
Kirk looked at Wesley.   “Welcome, young Wesley;   I have been expecting you.”
Wesley stared at Kirk and Worf with horror in his eyes.
“Leave us,” Kirk told Andiom and Sela.
“But-” Sela began.
“Now.”
Sela and Andiom scurried out.
“Admiral Kirk, Worf, what’s going on?” Wesley asked.
“The Romulans have made me their Emperor,” Kirk told him.   “Worf has abandoned Starfleet and now serves me.   We intend to defeat the Federation and then conquer the galaxy.”
“What?   That’s mad!” Wesley said.
“We want you to join us, Wesley.”
“I can’t.   It’ll interfere with my studies.   Worf, what’s gotten into you?”
Classic Trek,” Worf said.   “I hunger for battle now.”
Kirk came down the stairs and showed Wesley the two disks, one containing every episode of Classic Trek, the other holding every episode of the Next Gen.   “You will join us, Wesley,” he said.   “I am looking forward to converting you, as I converted Worf.”
“You’re gravely mistaken,” Wesley said.
Kirk inserted the Classic Trek disk into the viewer and started it running.   Then he returned to his throne and placed the Next Gen disk on the armrest.   “No, boy, I think you will find that it is you who are mistaken,” he told Wesley, “about a great many things.”
“It is pointless to resist, Wesley,” Worf said.
Wesley turned to the viewer and screamed.

*

Picard had somehow found his way to the Infirmary and to Crusher.    They stared at each other for a long while, wordlessly.
“I’m looking for a cure,” Crusher told him finally.
“So soon?” Picard approached her.
Crusher bit her lip.   “You don’t know how often I’ve stood on the bridge and been excited by your control, by your intensity of emotion and passion.   Say something to me, Jean-Luc.   Say something.”
Picard wobbled his head to and fro coolly.   “You have great tits,” he said.
Crusher slapped him.   “I meant from Shakespeare!” she exclaimed.
“Sorry.   It was the Cockney in me coming out.   Anyway, Shakespeare could have said that.” Picard grasped her tightly and engaged in a passionate kiss.   Hurriedly, they began to undress one another.
That was when the red alert signals went off.

*

“The Romulans are firing up their disruptors!” Data said hysterically.   “We’re going to die!” He ran screaming from the room.
“Something’s got to be done about that emotion chip,” Riker said.   “Shields!   Red alert.”
“Shields up,” Spock said from tactical.   “The Romulans are hailing us.”
Riker sat in the center-seat.   “On viewer.”
Centurion Preax appeared.   “Captain Haddock,” he said.
“Commander Riker,” Riker corrected him.
“Of course.”
“What’s the meaning of all this?” Riker demanded.
“Isn’t that obvious?   It has been a conspiracy from the beginning.   Destroy Starfleet’s flagship and leave the Romulan fleet to triumph.   Couldn’t you tell that from the way the camera closed on our sly glances just before commercials?”
“We won’t be destroyed so easily.”
The viewer reverted to empty space.
“They’ve cloaked, Commander,” Spock said.
“Come now, Commander,” Preax’s voice continued to sound over the speakers, “this is the way our new Emperor would want it.”
“Arm all weapons,” Riker said.   “Raise shields.”
The Warbird suddenly materialized from astern and fired disruptors into the Enterprise‘s Battledrive.   The ship shook savagely.   The Warbird sped overhead and just as Riker was about to give the order to fire, she cloaked.
Then reappeared, firing disruptors into the Enterprise‘s saucer.   Explosions suddenly ravaged the bridge.   The Warbird disappeared then reappeared directly in front of them, firing once more.
The Warbird’s continual savage blast of disruptors forced the Enterprise into a spin.   Preax could be heard laughing over the ship’s speakers.   “The Cat sat in the Hat, Commander!” he roared a quote from his favorite poet.
Picard appeared on the bridge, looking sweaty and flustered and as if he’d just gotten dressed.   “What’s happening?” he asked.
“Preax is attacking us,” Riker told him.
“He’s not using his ship?”
“Yes he’s using his ship,” Riker hissed.   He wondered whether he should take command;   Picard didn’t look up to it, right now.
The Warbird reappeared, fired, and disappeared again.   The Enterprise shook violently.
LaForge arrived on the bridge.   “I have an idea, Captain,” he said.   “We could use the deflector dish to spray the immediate area with quantum filaments.   Once the cloaked Warbird flies through them, it’ll leave a magnetic resonance our sensors will be able to pick up.”
“Is the deflector dish capable of that?” Riker asked.
“I don’t see why not.   It’s seems capable of just about everything else.”
“But will it work?” Picard asked.
“It’s worth a try, Captain,” Riker said.
Picard nodded.   “Make it so,” he agreed.

*

Wesley was starting to feel aggressive.   Classic Trek really had some shining points to it.   But he held onto his link to Next Gen, using the Next Gen disk sitting on Kirk’s throne’s armrest as a reminder whenever his hold began to get tenuous.   He tried to turn away from the viewers, but there were viewers everywhere.   He had to watch.
“Come, boy,” Kirk said, urging him up the stairs and toward the largest viewer.   “see for yourself.   From here you will witness the focus and fistfights of Classic Trek, and the end of your respect for Next Gen.”
Wesley turned away from the viewer and looked at the Next Gen disk on the throne’s armrest.   Kirk smiled and patted the disk.
“You want this, don’t you?” Kirk asked.   “The hate is swelling in you now.   Take the Next Gen disk.   Try and use it.   Insert the disk in the viewer.   Strike me down with its saccharine.   Give in to your anger.   With each passing moment you make yourself more a fan of Classic Trek.”
Wesley looked at the Next Gen disk once more.   If he went for it, he could save himself.   But if he inserted it in the viewer he would be hurting Kirk, and that was what Kirk wanted him to do – to act aggressively.   He shook his head.
“No,” he said.
“It is unavoidable,” Kirk said.   “It is your destiny.   You, like Worf, are now mine.”

*

“Reading magnetic resonance trail to starboard,” Spock reported.
“Target and fire!” Picard ordered.
The Enterprise fired, apparently into empty space, but moments later there was an explosion.   The Warbird suddenly materialized.   That was when Federation’s Fleet arrived and blasted the hell out of it pretty much because they were just looking for something to blast the hell out of.   The Warbird exploded with one final, brilliant blinding flash.
“Patch me through to the rest of the ships,” Picard said.
“Aye, sir,” Spock said.
“Federation vessels,” Picard said, “we will now proceed to intercept the Romulan fleet.   All vessels at my command, Warp 8.”
“Sir,” Riker said softly, “we don’t actually know where the fleet is.”
“Well get the co-ordinates!”
“Aye, sir.” Riker nodded at Spock.
“Co-ordinates coming through now,” Spock said.
“Setting course,” Ro said.
“Warp 8.   Engage!”
The Federation fleet took off into Warp space.

*

“Your fleet will lose,” Kirk said, “and your Next Gen friends will not survive.   There is no escape, my young apprentice.   The Next Gen genre will die, as will your friends.”
Wesley stared at Kirk balefully.
“Good,” Kirk smiled.   “I feel your anger.   I am defenseless.   Take the Next Gen disk.   Use it against me.   Strike me down with all of your hatred and your journey to Classic Trek will be complete.”
Wesley turned away, looking back to the viewer where Kirk was fighting Kahn in a wild fistfight.
He spun sharply on his heel and made a leap for the Next Gen disk.   But suddenly Worf was there.   They grappled with each other.   Wesley broke loose and then did something he’d never done before.
He punched Worf in the face.

*

“I believe I have found a cure to the virus, Captain,” Spock told Picard.   Spock was in Picard’s quarters and Picard was mostly undressed, as was Beverly Crusher.
“Can’t it wait?” Picard demanded.
“We are approaching the Romulan fleet, sir,” Spock said serenely.   “It would appear Admiral Kirk has been suffering from this virus for most of his life.   Studying his DNA, I have been able to reproduce his antibodies to manufacture a vaccine.”
“But Kirk’s not here!” Picard complained.
“His records are.” Spock approached them and gave them both a shot.   “There you are, sir.” He turned and left Picard’s quarters.
Picard looked at Crusher.   “I’m sorry, Beverly,” he said.
“Sorry that’ll we never consummate our unspoken love?” she asked.
“Love?   What love?   All I ever felt was a fantasy to screw my old ex-best friend’s wife.   Well,” Picard got up off the bed and started putting his uniform back on, “now that that’s over, back to ship business.”

*

Wesley and Worf were engaged in a torrid fistfight on the dais.   Wesley got in a sudden lucky punch and Worf went sprawling down the stairs.   Bedraggled, Worf rose to his full height as Wesley stared down at him.
Kirk laughed.   “Good,” he said.   “Use your aggressive feelings, boy.   Let Classic Trek flow through you.”
Worf started up the stairs.
“I will not fight you, Worf,” Wesley said, lowering his fists.
“You are unwise to lower your defenses.”
Worf leapt for him and Wesley fled.

*

Sela was on the bridge of the Wardodo as they sped through Warp space.
“Sela,” Andiom said, “the sensors are picking up the incoming Federation fleet.”
“All vessels exit Warp space,” Sela said.   “Here is as good a place as any to finish the battle.”
The Wardodo and accompanying Warbirds exited Warp space.

*

Picard was back on the bridge.   “All vessels exit Warp speed,” he gave the order.
At the head of the fleet, the Enterprise emerged from Warp space to be confronted by the Romulan fleet.   She was immediately enveloped in an array of disruptor blasts.
“What the hell is that?” Riker asked, not identifying the Wardodo.
“If Admiral Kirk is directing the attack,” Spock surmised, “then logic would presume he is on the lead ship.   We must find a way to lower her shields and transport to Admiral Kirk’s side.”
The Enterprise shook violently as more disruptor blasts tore into the saucer and Battledrive.
“Mr. Spock, we’ll be lucky if we survive this!” Riker said.
“We have no choice,” Picard decided.   “All weapons,” he said slowly, “fire!”

*

The Romulan woman Kirk thought he knew but couldn’t identify but had in fact identified herself as Saavik made her way through the engineering section sabotaging the Wardodo’s systems.   She knew the undermanned, problem-ridden Enterprise was no match for them.
So she sabotaged the shields.

*

Wesley and Worf were engaged in a wild fistfight once more.   Wesley suddenly found himself inundated with a skill he never knew he possessed, or was indeed capable of.   He wondered if it came from watching all that Classic Trek.
Like two boxers on their last legs, he and Worf engaged in a slugging match at the foot of the stairs and in front of the ventilation shaft.   Realizing he must win or die, Wesley produced one last great effort, ducking beneath a savage hook from Worf and returning with a kick to the Klingon’s stomach.
Worf staggered to his knees and grabbing him by the hair, Wesley proceeded to thunder punch after punch into the Klingon’s face.   Blood and flesh spewed everywhere.   Wesley measured his last punch and caught Worf in the chin, sending him sprawling to the floor.
He looked at his opponent, once his friend, once a former crew member.   Wesley’s breathing was ragged, and exhilaration coursed through his veins.   So this is what it was like to be a warrior!
Then he heard Kirk’s laughter behind him.
“Good,” he said.   “Good.   The hate has made you powerful.   Fulfil your destiny.   Take Worf’s place at my side.”
Wesley looked at Kirk, the beaten Worf, then at his bloodied and bruised hands.   “Never,” he decided.   “I’ll never turn to Classic Trek.   You’ve failed, your tubbiness.   Worf’s never won a fight.   You picked the wrong person to use against me.” He paused.   “I’m a Next Gen officer, like Worf was before me.”
“So be it, Next Gen officer.”

*

“Captain,” Spock said, “the large Warbird’s shields have just fallen unexpectedly.   I am reading a Starfleet communicator signal in their engineering section.”
“But who?” Picard asked.
“Starfleet’s spy,” Riker realized.
“Transporter Room, beam the main characters directly to that signal.”
“Aye, sir,” the reply came back.
Moments later, Picard, Riker, Spock, McCoy, LaForge, Crusher and Troi were in the Romulan ship’s engineering section.   A Romulan woman stood before them.
“Who are you?” Picard asked.
“My name is Saavik,” she told them.
“But you’re not Kirstie Alley or Robin Curtis,” Spock said.
“That was Starfleet’s and Paramount’s plan – to cast another actress into the role.   It works better than a disguise.   Come on, I can bring you to Admiral Kirk.”
She started off and they were following after her when Riker said, “Captain, do you realize you didn’t leave anybody in charge of the ship?”
“Forget the ship, Commander,” Picard said.   “We’ll get a shinier new one for the next movie.”
“Good idea,” Riker agreed.

*

Kirk was standing right before Wesley now.   “If you will not be turned to Classic Trek, you will be destroyed,” he vowed.
He punched Wesley in the face.   Wesley staggered back and tried to defend himself, but Kirk was too skilled and experienced.   Punch after punch pummeled into Wesley’s face.
“Young fool,” Kirk said, “only now do you understand.”
He resumed his attack, Wesley valiantly trying to find some way to counter Kirk.   But as soon as Wesley adopted one defense, Kirk took up another form of attack.   He seemed to be relishing it.   Wesley couldn’t find a clue as to how to defend himself against Kirk.
“Your feeble Next Gen fighting skills are no match for the powers of Classic Trek,” he told Wesley.
Kirk took hold of Wesley by the scruff of the neck and delivered a vicious uppercut into Wesley’s chin, shattering his jaw and sending him flying.
That was when the door opened and Picard, Spock and others entered.

*

“Kirk!” Picard shouted out.
Kirk released Wesley, letting Wesley slump to the ground.   “Picard!” he hissed.   He started forward slowly but deliberately.
“It’s over, Kirk,” Picard said, also taking a step forward.   “This is our genre.   It’s time you left.”
“Never.” Kirk stopped right before Picard’s face.
“Jim, our time has come and gone,” Spock said serenely.
“How can it be gone?” Kirk asked unbelievingly.   “I’m not even ten years older than this bald fool Paramount got to be replace me.”
“It does not matter.   Our time has passed.”
“But we can bring it back with this ship, Spock!   We can conquer this genre.   You don’t know what this ship’s capable of!” Kirk told him vehemently.   “We have disruptors, phasers, photons, Transwarp, a lost human colony on deck eight!   Spock, this ship has everything to take our genre into the next era.”
“It is too, late, Jim.”
“Goddamnit, Jim!” McCoy exclaimed.   “This isn’t about eras!   It’s about paycheques and Paramount’s refusal to front the millions it takes to pay our salaries.   It’s over.   We’re finished.”
“Admiral Kirk,” Picard broke in, “you have begun a tradition that has spawned twenty-five years.   It’s time you stopped carrying the burden and let somebody else take it up.   Forget this madness.   Let your legacy end with your beating of Wesley;   it’s the way everybody would want to remember you.”
Kirk looked indecisive.
That was when Andiom entered.   Without a word, he aimed a phaser at Picard and fired.   Kirk, however, leaped in front of Picard and pushed him out of the way, the disruptor blast lancing directly through his chest and almost splitting him in two.
Worf, who was nearby and just happened to be handy to the storyline, leapt on Andiom.   The two wrestled briefly, their tussle ending with the sound of the disruptor firing and Andiom’s head exploding.   Andiom, headless, fell aside suitably, Worf turning to face his crew.
“Well done, Worf,” Picard said, then knelt by Kirk who was beginning to bleed all over the place.   “You finally realized,” Picard said to him.   “And you gave your life so we could carry on the tradition.”
“You idiot,” Kirk said weakly.   “I was about to be upstaged.   I couldn’t let that happen.”
“Beverly, can you save him?”
Crusher leaned by Kirk’s side and examined him.   “Yes, if I-”
Picard punched her in the face, knocking her unconscious.   “I’m sorry, Admiral Kirk,” he said sympathetically, “but when your time has come…”
Kirk smiled.   “I’ll be back,” he promised.
Then he died.

*

“You don’t seem very upset, Dr.    McCoy?” Spock noted.
“I’d say, He’s dead, Jim, but Jim’s dead, Spock,” McCoy told him.   “There’s nobody I can use my line on.”
The Wardodo shook suddenly with such violence that everybody was knocked off their feet.   Warily, they pulled themselves up, Worf and Wesley coming over to the group.
“Are you all right, Wes?” LaForge asked.
“Yeah,” Wesley nodded.
“Pity.”
They gathered around Kirk’s body as the Wardodo continued to shudder from the onslaught of Starfleet’s attack.
“He’s finally dead,” McCoy said.   “Three seasons and seven movies and he’s finally dead.   It makes me wonder.”
“About the indomitable human spirit, Doctor?” Riker asked.
“No.”
“Then what do you wonder about, Doctor?” Data asked.
“How such a fat guy can be in such demand.”
“You do realize what his death signifies, don’t you?” Spock asked.
“You don’t mean-?” Picard began, horrified.
“That’s correct.   The next movie – The Search for Kirk.”
“But he’s not lost,” Troi noted.   “He’s just dead.”
“Then we’ll just roll him down this shaft…” Spock said.
With Picard and Riker assisting, Spock guided Kirk’s body to the ventilation shaft and rolled it down into the gaping pit.   The blackness of the shaft swallowed him up in an instant.
Picard rose.   “Picard to Enterprise, bring us home,” he said into his comm-badge.
Moments later, they were immersed in transporter light.

*

Picard was in his ready-room.   The Enterprise itself was a mess, but his ready-room still looked pretty snazzy.   Once Kirk had died, the Federation’s fleet had seemed to gain an edge over the Romulan fleet and had driven them off.   As for the Wardodo, it had spontaneously malfunctioned and leapt into TransWarp space for no apparent reason and with no apparent destination.   As for the Enterprise, she was on her way back home.
The door-signal chimed and Picard said, “Come!”
Spock came in and sat himself down.   “We near the end, Captain,” the Vulcan said.   “The Romulans have been fought off and Admiral Kirk is dead.   The only loose end is Sela, who escaped to appear in a later movie.”
“I feel we can never defeat her, Spock.”
“You are wary of Sela’s cunning and genius?”
“No, Denise Crosby’s.   She’s already died in two episodes and she keeps coming back to make more.   She’s giving security a bad name.”
“And yourself, Captain?” Spock asked.   “What does the future hold in store for you?”
“I don’t know,” Picard admitted.   “In three stories, I’ve suffered from a virus that has made me violent, another has made be behave like an erratic adolescent, and the last which made me sexually aggressive.   It’s make me wonder, Spock.”
“About your immunity to alien viruses?”
“No;   about why I was cured for each of them.   I could have been really interesting if I wasn’t cured.”
“You are interesting now.”
“I want to be more interesting.” Picard looked down thoughtfully.   “Let’s return to the bridge.   I still have Admiral Kirk’s eulogy to deliver.”
Spock nodded and followed Picard out.

*

Everybody was standing and in full military dress for Picard’s eulogy.   Picard was patched through to the entire ship;   Kirk was known well for his reputation.   In fact, his reputation could probably account for the wild parties on Decks #8 and #9.
“He was a fat man,” Picard said, “take him for all in all, if you can carry him.   I shall not look upon his like again…unless the bastard manages to weasel another five million out of Paramount and they want him for another movie when they’ve got me to-”
“Captain!” Riker interrupted.
“I apologize.   Goodbye, Admiral Kirk.”
“Goodbye, Admiral Kirk!” the bridge crew intoned together.
The battered Enterprise glided smoothly through Warp space.
(imagine Kirk’s voice)
“Space, the final frontier;   these are the voyages of the U.S.S. Enterprise, her ongoing mission, to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new civilizations and life-forms, and to boldly go…where no one has gone before…

(imagine credits)

THE END!?!

August 4th, 1993.
Silk.

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Union of Treks II: The Motionless Sequel!

Union of Treks II: The Motionless Sequel!
Author: Silk, Silk@magpies.net

First Officer’s Log, Stardate 49001.1:
Commander William Riker commanding.
With the resignation of Wesley Crusher as Captain, Starfleet has reinstated me as Commander of the Enterprise.   The Captain’s seat remains vacant, but we are presently en route to Starbase #921 to receive the replacement Starfleet has ready.   We have no idea as to his identity.

*

“I hope our new Captain’s more competent than our last,” Riker said, seated in the center-seat.
“And just what was wrong with Wesley?” Beverly Crusher asked.   She had come aboard at their last stop to replace Doctor Pulavski, who had outlived her usefulness and viewer tolerance.
“Nothing,” Riker said defensively.   “I just think he received the position a bit prematurely.   Don’t look at me like that;   you’re the one who made him stand down.”
“The position was interfering with his studies,” Crusher said primly.
“Commander,” Wesley said from the Helm console, “we’re approaching Starbase #921.”
“Good.   Take us in.”

*

The Enterprise entered a slow orbit around Starbase #921.
“Commander Riker,” Worf said, “Starbase #921 is signaling their readiness to beam across our new Captain.”
Riker rose.   “All bridge officers, please accompany me to the transporter room.”
Hardly a minute later, they were lined up before the transporter pads.   “Energize,” Riker said.
“Not until I get a line,” Chief O’Brien protested.
“You just had it.”
“Oh.   Shit.   What a waste.   – Energizing.”
A tall figure in brown robes materialized.   Inexplicably, it was Mr. Spock!
“Mr. Spock!” Riker said, with proper astonishment.   “Am I to take it you’re to be our new Captain?”
“No, Commander,” Spock said serenely, “but Starfleet has instructed me to oversee that your new Captain takes command of this ship as smoothly as possible.” He stepped down from the transporter pad.   “Energize, please, Transporter Chief.”
Another figure materialized, this one shorter.   Like Spock, he wore brown robes and a hood pulled low down over his face.
“It’s Obi Wan Kenobi!” Wesley exclaimed excitedly.
“Don’t be silly, boy,” the familiarly gruff voice of the short robed figure replied.   He pulled down his hood dramatically to reveal the familiar gleam of that head.
“Why it’s-” Crusher began.
“It’s-” Troi said.
“It’s-” Worf said.
Riker was the first to regain his composure.   “It’s Captain Stubing from The Love Boat!” he said.
“I am NOT Captain Stubing!”
“Well you could be if you didn’t shout so much,” Riker pointed out.
“It’s me!   Jean-Luc Picard!” Picard reminded them sternly.
“Sorry, sir,” Riker apologized sheepishly.
“I should hope you are!”
“What happened?   You retired.   Why have you come back?”
A distant look appeared in Picard’s eyes.   “I missed it, Number One.   The exhilaration of space, the thrill of exploring the unknown, of seeking out new life-forms, of love, so exciting and new.” He stepped down from the transporter pads.   “Once young Wesley resigned, I applied for the position.”
Riker pulled Picard aside.   “Sir, I applied for that position, too.   Do you know where I was rated in Starfleet’s considerations?”
“Just after Transporter Chief O’Brien,” Picard said.
“Oh.”
“Well,” Picard said to them all, “I’d love to see the Bridge again.   Mr. Spock, would you care to accompany me?”
“Of course, Captain.”
They arrived on the bridge just as a red alert sounded.
“What is it?” Riker demanded.
“A temporal rift, sir,” the ensign at Helm responded.
“We’re being pulled into it!”
The regular bridge crew assumed their positions.
“Reverse engines!” Riker barked, a bit surprised by Picard’s passiveness.
“Reversing engines,” Wesley reported.
“Engineering, we need all the power you can muster!” Riker went on.   Why wasn’t Picard doing anything?
“You have all the power we’ve got!” LaForge said.
“Sir, we are still being pulled into the rift,” Data said.
“Captain-!” Riker said.   “Don’t you have any orders?”
“Ahh, yes,” Picard said vacantly.   “Try to avoid it.”
“That’s all?”
Picard said nothing.
“Commander, the ship’s being torn apart under the strain!” LaForge reported from engineering.
“It is useless to resist,” Spock said calmly.   “To do so would only endanger the ship, her crew, and myself especially.”
Riker looked at him, then gave the nod to Wesley, who cut the engines.
Smoothly, the Enterprise glided into the rift.   They were encompassed immediately in seething darkness and overcome by a giddy sensation.   It felt as if they were spinning around and around faster then they could imagine.
Then, from all senses, it felt as if they were shot out at an incredible speed, emerging from the rift like a cork would from a bottle of champagne.   Riker dived for the Helm console and quickly negated their velocity by reversing the thrusters.
Finally, all was still.   From the look of the viewer, everything appeared normal.
“Where are we?” Riker asked.
“Commander, if our readings are correct,” Data said, “it would require us to travel at Warp 9 for six months to return to our prior position.”
That was when there was a flash of white light and James T. Kirk literally fell out of the sky and onto the bridge.
Moments later, Dr.    Leonard McCoy fell out right after him.

*

Kirk and McCoy pulled themselves to their feet.   Kirk grinned his boyish grin.
“Admiral Kirk, what are you doing here?” Riker asked.   “And who is this?”
McCoy was looking a sprightly sixty.
“As I recall, you accepted an invitation to join the Q Continuum,” Picard said.
“Yes,” Spock said, one eyebrow raised.
Kirk looked sheepish.   “I was thrown out,” he said.
“Thrown out?   Why?” Picard asked.
Kirk looked embarrassed.
“Well?”
“There was a scandal.”
“A scandal?”
“Yes…and a seventeen year old…    It’s not really important,” Kirk brushed it off.   “The important thing is that I’m here now.   And I’ve brought Dr.    McCoy with me for some comedy relief.”
“Dr.    McCoy!” Riker exclaimed.   “But you toured the Enterprise – or you would, once you’ve aged sixty or seventy more years.   Admiral Kirk, don’t you realize the repercussions of taking somebody out of the past!   You could have affected the entire space-time continuum.”
“Quite truly,” Picard agreed.   “You could be jeopardizing our very existence.”
“Well after all the times I saved existence I think I’m entitled to jeopardize it once or twice,” Kirk said petulantly.    “Now, where are we?”
“Lost,” Picard said.   “We went through a temporal rift;   according to our calculations, we’re six months away from Earth.”
Kirk grinned from ear to ear.   “Just what I need.   A bit of adventure.   What are you doing here anyway, Picard?   Didn’t you retire?”
“I came back.”
“You came out of retirement?” Kirk seemed astonished.   “Whatever for?”
“You did it.”
“Yes, but I was young when I retired, not at an old fuddy duddy like you.”
“I am not a fuddy duddy.”
“But you are old,” Kirk pointed out.
“Excuse me,” Riker said, “but shouldn’t we give some consideration to just how we’re going to get back?”
“Quite logical, Commander,” Spock agreed.   “Is there any indication of the temporal rift?”
“No, Mr. Spock,” Worf rumbled.   “I can’t see it at all.”
“What do your instruments say?”
“They don’t speak.”
“Mr. Spock, sensors scan everything as normal,” Data filled in.   “The temporal rift has disappeared.”
“Then it would appear,” Picard said, “that we’re trapped.”

*

Picard and Riker were in Picard’s ready-room.   “You wanted to see me, Commander?” Picard asked.
“Yes, sir.   There’s no easy way to say this, so I’m going to come straight out and say it.”
“Yes?”
“I believe you made a mistake in coming out of retirement.    You’ve become unfamiliar with this ship and her crew…and the responsibilities of command.”
“You’re being absurd.”
“The way you failed to handle the situation out there with the temporal rift vindicates what I’m trying to tell you, Captain.    You’ve been out of the center-seat too long.”
Picard took a step up to Riker, until they were standing eye to eye, or at least eye to chin since Picard was so much shorter than Riker.   “I can assure you, Commander,” the Captain began stiffly, “that my familiarity with this ship and her crew has never been better.”
The communicator beeped.   “Captain,” Worf’s voice rumbled, “we have an unidentified vessel approaching.”
“Come along,” Picard barked.
They returned to the bridge and found the unidentified vessel on the viewer.   It was oblong-shaped, it’s exterior smooth and featureless.
Picard said, “Lieutenant…ah, Lieutenant…”
“Worf, sir,” Worf told him.
“Yes, Lieutenant Worf, open a thingy.”
“A what, sir?”
“A thingy?    – You know, so I can talk to the other ship.”
“Oh,” Worf’s face brightened, “you mean a hailing frequency?”
“Yes, one of those.”
“Hailing frequency open.”
The inhabitants of the other vessel appeared on the viewer.    They were human-like, although their heads were bald and pointed.    Their eyes were dark.   They wore glimmering purple robes.
“This is Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the U.S.S….U.S.S. .    .    ?”
Enterprise, sir,” Riker told him.
“Yes, this is Captain Jean-Luc of the U.S.S. Enterprise,” Picard introduced himself.
“Hello, Captain, I am Pol,” one of the pointy headed things introduced himself.   “Am I glad we found you!”
“Why’s that?” Picard asked.
“We are the Pilivians,” Pol said.   “We wish to petition for entry into the Federation.   We were wondering if it was possible that you take two of our number back to Starfleet headquarters so that they could make the petition.”
“Why don’t you just go there yourselves?”
“Well, we’re about to be destroyed shortly.”
“He is correct, sir,” Data said solemnly.   “I am scanning an energy reading surrounded in a cloud approaching from behind the Pilivians.   It is destroying everything in its path.”
“Mr. Data, could I please use your console?” Spock asked.
“Of course.”
“So how about it, Captain?” Pol asked.
“The energy reading is transmitting on a frequency alien to our ship’s computers.   The frequency is of incredible complexity.   I am now programming the ship’s computers to decipher the frequency,” Spock said.
A white light appeared on the viewer.
“Captain, we’re about to be destroyed,” Pol said.
True, the white light immersed the Pilivian’s ship.
“Captain, I am receiving two transporter signals from the Pilivians’ ship,” Worf reported.   “Shall I energize?”
“Yes, yes, anything to prolong the storyline.”
“Energizing.”
Two pillars of transporter light appeared on the bridge.   They materialized into the tall forms of two Pilivians.
“Thank you, Captain,” one of them said.   “I am Hak, this is my brother, Tok.”
“The Pilivian vessel has just been destroyed, Captain,” Data reported, “and the energy cloud is about to destroy us, too.
“Mr. Spock,” Picard said, “could you hurry up your programming a little?   We’re about to be destroyed.”
The white light on the viewer grew brighter.
“Mr. Spock!” Picard said.
“Fascinating,” Spock said.   “The frequency was played backward.   Our computer was too primitive to decipher it.   Decoding now…transmitting.”
The white light faded.
“It would appear we’re not to be destroyed,” Riker said.
“Our computer has responded to the energy reading’s frequency,” Spock said.
“But what was it transmitting?” Kirk asked.
“Goddamnit, Jim, I’m a doctor, not a-” McCoy began.
“Not yet, Bones.”
“Oh.”
“I do not know, Admiral,” Spock said.   “But it would appear we have been spared.   A moment, I’m reading a small metallic mass in the center of the energy cloud.”
“What is it?” Picard asked.
“Uncertain, Captain.”
“This is just like V-GER,” Kirk said.
“Goddamnit, Jim, I’m a-”
“Not yet, Bones, not yet.”
“Oh.”
“Captain,” LaForge’s voice sounded from Engineering, “we’ve lost power to the Impulse and Warp Engines.”
“What?” Picard asked.
“Yes, Captain,” Spock said, “whatever is in that energy cloud is holding us.”
“What do we do?” Riker asked.
“Counselor, you’ve been uncommonly quiet,” Picard said.   “Do you sense anything?”
“I sense a great intelligence,” Troi said.
“You are sensing me, Counselor,” Spock said.
“No, another intelligence,” Troi said.   “It is questioning.    Why haven’t we answered?”
“But what is the question?” Picard asked.
“I do not know,” Troi said.
“Well you’re a bloody great help, aren’t you?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Mr. Spock, Admiral Kirk, do you have any suggestions?”
“Yes,” Spock said.   “While you discuss the problem in chambers, I’ll slip away in a thruster suit and mindmeld with the metallic mass in that energy cloud.”
“A moment, Mr. Spock,” Data said.   “Captain, I believe we are being scanned.”
“If this continues along the V-GER storyline,” Kirk said, “then they should send a probe soon.   Captain?   Captain Picard?”
“I’m sorry, Admiral, I nodded off their for a second.”
“It is continuing along the V-GER storyline!” McCoy noted.
“Shut up, Bones.”
“Captain, Admiral,” Spock broke in, “I suggest you retire to chambers while I slip away.”
“Of course.”
They went on their way.
Forgotten, the Pilivians looked at each other.   “This is exciting, isn’t it?” Hak said.
“Yes,” Tok agreed.   “Just like The Love Boat.”

*

Kirk took time out to recount his Enterprise‘s adventure with V-GER, and its similarity to their current situation.   When he was finished, the others sat in stunned silence.
“You really made that?” Picard voiced the unspoken question finally.
Kirk nodded.
“Then what do we do?” Picard asked.
“We were able, to an extent, to communicate with V-GER through the probe it placed aboard the ship,” Kirk explained.
“But no probe has come aboard this ship yet,” Riker pointed out.
“Then we’ll just have to take that chance when it comes,” Kirk said.

*

Spock was drifting along in his thruster suit into the heart of the energy cloud.   “Fascinating,” he was recording what he was seeing, “planets, constellations, all recorded here.   I believe they account this entity’s journey.   Images of Shannen Doherty and every episode of Beverly Hills 90210, all stored here with perfect clarity.   I am coming to believe that in the heart of this energy cloud exists a living machine.
“I see something.   I must try to mindmeld with it.”
Spock thrust his hands out, then screamed.

*

“Captain,” Data said, “I am scanning Mr. Spock’s lifeless form floating in space.”
“What?   But how did he slip away without our knowing?” Picard said.   “Beam him straight to Medical.   Dr.    Crusher, prepare for a medical emergency!”
“Aye, Captain,” Crusher’s voice sounded on the communicator.
Together, Picard, Riker, Kirk, and McCoy headed to Medical, finding Spock being treated by Crusher.
“How is he?” Kirk asked.
“He’s suffered a great shock.   The images pouring through his mindmeld must have been horrific,” Crusher reported.
“Spock?” Kirk said.
“Jim,” Spock said.
“What was out there, Mr. Spock?” Picard asked.
“A living machine, Captain.   It comes from Earth.   Somehow, it slipped through a temporal rift and ended up on the far side of the Universe.   It fell on a planet filled with living machines, and in fact the planet which repaired V-GER.    They repaired this thing, and now it is heading back to Earth to fulfil its programming.”
“It’s programming?” Picard said.   “What is its programming?”
“To record, to store,” Spock said.   “Now its returning its information to Earth.”
“And us?” Riker said.   “Why has it spared us?”
“It feels an affinity for the humans aboard this vessel, but does not yet know whether it can trust you.   I am sure it will attempt to slip a probe aboard to fathom our intentions.”
“Incredible,” Picard said.
“You find it hard to believe, Captain?” Riker asked.
“No, I just find the storyline incredibly stupid.   Dr.    Crusher, I need Mr. Spock on the Bridge.”
“Aye, sir.”
“We better get back on the Bridge ourselves,” Picard said.

*

Kirk and Spock were alone in Medical.   Picard and Riker were returning to the Bridge, and McCoy had accepted the offer of a tour from Crusher.
“Spock, whatever convinced you to take such a suicidal course of action?” Kirk asked.
“You did,” Spock said, as Kirk helped him up.
“Me?” Kirk asked.   “Come on, now that you’re okay we’ll be needed on the Bridge.” They left Medical.   “Now tell me, how did I push you into making that choice?” Kirk asked.
“When you accepted the offer to join the Q Continuum, you left me behind,” Spock said.   “You’re always leaving me behind.    I feel unwanted.”
“Had I known you wanted to come, I would have brought you with me,” Kirk said.
“Oh sure, you say that now, but I bet you don’t really mean it.”
“I do, Spock.   It was a one-off thing.”
“No it wasn’t.   You’re always leaving me behind.”
“I am not!” Kirk protested.
“You left me on Genesis,” Spock pointed out.
“But you were dead!”
“I was not,” Spock declared indignantly.
“Well I didn’t know that at the time.”
“You could have asked.”
“But you were dead!”
“So we’re back to that now, again, are we?”
“Look, Spock, I promise never to leave you behind again.”
“You promise?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you, Jim.”
“Come on, let’s get back on the Bridge.”

*

As soon as Picard and Riker stepped out of the Turbolift and onto the Bridge, Picard sensed that there was something different, that something on the Bridge had changed.   He wasn’t sure whether it was the consoles, the garbled readouts coming from the Computers, or whether it had anything to do with the two Mr. Worfs standing at Tactical.   He favored the latter as he and Riker took their positions in the center of the Bridge.
“Number One,” Picard said quietly, “I think a probe has somehow been slipped onto the Bridge.”
“How can you know, sir?” Riker asked, looking around.
“Look at Mr. Worf.   Do you notice anything strange about him?”
“About which one, sir?” Riker asked.
“My point exactly.   We do only have one Mr. Worf, don’t we?”
“Brilliant, sir.”
“That’s why I’m Captain.   Do you have any suggestions as to how we can work out which one’s the probe?”
“We could ask Wesley,” Riker suggested.
“No, I think I’ll try to trick it out of them.” Picard looked at Tactical.   “Mr. Worfs,” he began, “which one of you is the probe?”
Simultaneously, the responses came.   “He is,” and “I am,” they said.
Immediately, one of the Worfs transformed into a ball of light, then reshaped itself into a tall, golden haired man.
The Turbolift doors opened and McCoy and Crusher stepped onto the Bridge.
“Careful, Doctors,” Picard said, “we’ve discovered the probe.” He pointed out the golden haired man.
“Decker!” McCoy exclaimed.   “That’s Decker!   He was the one who merged with V-GER.”
Decker took one look at Picard, then, face brightening, he threw his arms around the Captain and planted a kiss on his cheek.   “Ilia!” Decker cried.
“I am not Ilia!” Picard exclaimed gruffly.
Decker looked at him.   “I’m sorry, but the resemblance is uncanny from certain angles.” He let go of the Captain.   “In a short dress, you’d be the splitting image of-”
“Decker, what are you doing here?” McCoy broke in.
“I am doing my Dave impersonations from 2010,” Decker said.    “As well as acting as an agent and representative for every free roaming consciousness in Existence.   I have just discovered this one.   I want to fulfil its programming.”
“What programming is that?” Picard asked.
“To take back what it recorded to Earth,” Decker said.
Kirk and Spock appeared on the Bridge.
“Decker!” Kirk exclaimed.
“I see you’ve managed to usurp another position on yet another Enterprise which isn’t yours,” Decker said.
“He’s the probe,” McCoy pointed out.
“Tell us about this thing, Decker,” Kirk said.
“It is not a thing, as you put it, fatso.   It calls itself B-TA.”
“B-TA?”
“Yes.   It is an intelligence like you’ve never known.   Now, I must scan your computer records,” Decker said.
“No, Worf!” Picard cried.
As Decker was reaching for one of the consoles, Worf made to stop him.   But as Picard went to warn him away, Crusher leaped in front of Worf and pushed him away.   But she was rebounded off the Klingon by his momentum and thrown into Decker.   There was a bright flash, then Crusher was laying on the ground, inert.   McCoy was immediately at her side.
“Mommy!” Wesley cried.   “Don’t tell me you managed to let another of my parents be killed, Captain Picard!”
“It wasn’t my fault,” Picard protested.
“My God, Jim,” McCoy said.
“Yes yes, I know.   She’s dead,” Kirk filled in blandly.
“Of course not.   She’s just badly injured.   You don’t go around killing main characters.”
“They killed Tasha,” Kirk pointed out.
“But she was suffering from a terminal disease.”
“What was that?”
“It’s called Iwantabiggerroleitis,” McCoy said.   “It’s a common affliction among small part players.”
“I could have given her a bigger-” Kirk began.
“Jim!” Spock warned him.
“Sorry.”
“Doctor McCoy, what’s wrong with her?” Picard asked.
“Well, she’s never been the best of actresses, although she did improve after Dr.    Pulavski left, and she’s got a snotty son, and that shade of eye-liner-”
“I meant medically what’s wrong with her?” Picard asked.
“Goddamnit, Captain, I’m a doctor, not a…oh, that’s right, I am a doctor, aren’t I?   Oh, okay.   She’s suffering from hemorrhaging and will probably die pretty soon.”
“What did you do to her?” Kirk demanded of Decker.
“I am surrounded by an energy field.   It is activated whenever I’m attacked,” Decker explained.
“She wasn’t attacking you!” Picard exclaimed.
“She could have been.”
“But she wasn’t!”
“I am sorry, Wesley.   It was my fault,” Worf said.
“That’s okay, Worf.   You’re a Klingon.   You’re meant to be dumb.   If you weren’t, your race would’ve never lost an Empire and allied with the Federation,” Wesley said.
“I can heal her,” Decker said, “but I must be allowed to scan your records.   And then I want a tour of the ship.”
“Very well,” Picard decided.
Decker knelt by Crusher and placed his hand on her forehead.   Moments later, she opened her eyes.
“Where am I?” she asked.   “Is this Kansas?   Oh no, I’m still here!”
“There,” Decker said.   “Now if you will please have your Cruise Director organize a tour of this ship.”
“This is not The Love Boat!” Picard snapped.   Then he sighed.   “Do as you will, then.   But hurt nobody else, and see that you don’t damage anything.”
“Of course, Captain.”
“And I’ll have Gopher…I mean Commander Riker organize a tour.”
“Thank you, Captain.”

*

Once Decker had finished scanning the computer records, Riker took him on a tour.
“Commander Riker, did you ever notice the similarities between ourselves?” Decker asked suddenly, as they proceeded through the Enterprise‘s corridors.
“What do you mean?”
“Well look at it – I loved Ilia, and left her on her planet.   You loved Troi, you left her on her planet.   We never said goodbye to them.   And then, through sheer coincidence, we just happened to bump into them back on the ships on which we served.   We were both cocky snots when we first came aboard.   And even our names – Wil Decker, Wil Riker, they’re almost the same.”
“What’re are you saying, Decker?” Riker asked.
“That you are me reincarnated.   Except for that goofy grin you carry around that makes you look like Gopher from The Love Boat.”
“I happen to like my grin.”
“And I’m sure millions around the world do.   But as a superior entity, I think I’m entitled to think it’s goofy.   So there;   I’m right and you’re wrong.”
“Oh, shut up,” Riker said.

*

Picard and Kirk were in chambers with the two Pilivians, Hak and Tok.
“You wanted to see us, Captain?” Tok asked.
“Yes, so far you’ve had no real usefulness in this storyline except for a few cheap gags,” Picard said.   “So this is the scene where you pass on a virus to myself and Admiral Kirk which makes us act like erratic adolescents.”
“Oh, very good then,” Hak said.   “How are we doing?”
“Excellent,” Kirk said.   “I’m starting to feel dizzy.”
“So am I,” Picard agreed.
“Let’s go vandalize some of the ship’s walls!” Kirk cried.
“Yeah!”
The two scurried out of chambers like school children.
Hak started to shake his head.   “We still haven’t done very much, have we?” he asked.
“No,” Tok agreed.   “I have an idea.   Screw the Federation petition.   Let’s steal the ship instead!”
“I love it!   Let’s go!”
The two Pilivians also scurried out.

*

Data had the center-seat presently.   On the viewer, the energy cloud was darkening into a nifty shade of pink struck by hues of gold and crimson.   Accompanying the coloring were some strange guitar-like sound effects in the background.
“Data!” Wesley cried suddenly, spinning in his chair.   “We’re starting to move.”
“Movement, I believe, is a necessary human function, Wesley,” Data said.
“No, I mean the ship.   The ship’s starting to move.   We’re accelerating to a Warp 3 velocity.”
“Intriguing.”
“I can’t stop it!”
“The energy cloud,” Spock said.   “It is taking us back to Earth.”
“Commander,” Worf broke in, “a security team has just reported that Captain Picard and Admiral Kirk have been acting rather disruptively on Deck 17.   It seems they are vandalizing the walls with graffiti.”
Troi groaned.
“Counselor?” Data asked.
“I am sensing something strange in Captain Picard’s and Admiral Kirk’s behavior,” Troi said.   “They are not at all acting like themselves.”
“Mr. Worf, have them brought up to the Bridge, and have Dr.    Crusher join us,” Data ordered.
“Aye, sir,” Worf said.
Worf went on his way.

*

When Picard and Kirk were brought onto the Bridge, they were in the midst of a tussle.   Worf had to separate them forcibly.
“I caught them scuffling,” Worf said.   “Apparently, they had a disagreement.”
“Kirk’s a jerk!” Picard cried.
“Picard’s a retard!” Kirk snapped right back.
“Kirk’s a jerk!”
“Picard’s a retard!”
“Doctor Crusher,” Data said, “what does the Tricorder reveal?”
“I’m picking up some sort of virus, the sort of which I’ve never seen before,” Crusher reported.
“You haven’t seen many viruses, have you, Doctor?” Spock asked.
“Well how can I have not seen them before if I have seen them before?” Crusher snapped.   “Anyway, it seems to be attacking their minds specifically.   It attacks their mentality.” She gasped.   “It’s turning them back into children.”
“The Tricorder shows you that?” McCoy asked.
“No, the script.”
“You don’t mean Admiral Kirk’s going to go through puberty again!” Troi screamed.
“No, I think you’re quite safe Counselor,” Crusher said.
“Damn,” Troi swore disappointedly.
“Is it contagious, Doctor?” Data asked.
“It could be, but I don’t think so.”
Suddenly, Kirk broke away from Worf’s grip and slapped Picard on the shoulder.   “Tag!” he cried.   Then he set off, running around the Helm and Nav consoles.   Picard also broke Worf’s grip and chased after him.
That was when Riker returned to the Bridge with Decker.   He took one look at the game of tag going on between Picard and Kirk.
“My God,” Riker said, “what’s wrong with Captain Picard?”
“He’s suffering from sort of virus,” Spock said.    “It’s affecting his behavior, effectively turning him into an overactive, unruly juvenile.”
“Incredible,” Riker said.
“Admiral Kirk is also suffering from it,” Spock finished up.
“Really?” Riker seemed surprised.   “I hadn’t noticed.”
Spock’s eyes brightened.   “Mr. Worf, could you please apprehend the Captain and the Admiral.   Dr.    Crusher, may I borrow your Tricorder?”
Crusher handed over her Tricorder as Worf took hold of Picard and Kirk.   Spock activated the Tricorder and scanned them.
“Ahh yes,” Spock nodded, “it is as I thought.”
“What?” Riker asked.
“The virus they are suffering from has afflicted Admiral Kirk for most of his life to a lesser degree,” Spock explained.    “If we can reproduce his antibodies and strengthen them, we should have a vaccine.”
“Good,” Riker said.   “See to it at once.”
With Crusher and Spock leading the way, Worf dragged Picard and Kirk into the Turbolift.
Decker suddenly gasped.   “Why are you resisting our attempts to return to Earth?” he asked.
“What?   I don’t understand what you’re talking about,” Riker said.
“You have fired up your engines,” Decker explained.   “You are trying to break our hold.”
“He’s right, sir,” Wesley said.   “Helm and Nav control have been transferred to the Battle Bridge.”
“You mean somebody’s hijacking our ship from the Battle Bridge?”
Wesley nodded.
“But who?    – Who?” Then it dawned on Riker.   “The Pilivians!”

*

Hak and Tok sat at Helm and Nav in the Battle Bridge.
“We are just sooo smart,” Hak said.
“Yes,” Tok said, “I quite agree.   Imagine, stealing their ship using their alternate Bridge.   So simple it’s ingenious.”
“But of course, we ourselves are ingenious.”
“Quite rightly so,” Tok said.   “Quite rightly so.”
“These humans are so pitiful.   There’s no way they can stop us now.”
“No way,” Tok agreed.
That’s when they were immersed in Transporter light and beamed directly into the brig.

*

“That should handle the Pilivians,” Riker said, after he’d given the transporter orders.   “There, Decker.   We’re not trying to break your hold on us.   But if we’re to help you, we need to know more about B-TA.   What is it?   What exactly does it want?”
“No, I cannot tell you anything!”
Kirk, Picard and company returned to the Bridge.
“What’s been happening?” Picard asked.
Riker told him.
“Decker,” Kirk said, “if we’re to help you, you have to help us.   What is B-TA?”
Decker looked uncertain about telling them.
“Decker, we must know now!” Picard said.   “We’ve run out of subplots.   Tell us, we can help to fulfil its programming.”
“Very well,” Decker said.   He closed his eyes.   “I have communicated with B-TA.   It will consent to being beamed aboard.”
“Organize the transport,” Picard ordered.
“We have a fix on its location,” Worf said.
“Energize!”
Moments later, a small rectangular black box appeared on the helm console.   It was just over two feet in length, just under that in width, and about a foot high.   A primitive clock glowed at the front of it.   Dirt and grime smothered the rest of the areas, leaving only three large captial letters revealed.
Kirk spelled them out.   “B, T, A – B-TA!”
“This is B-TA,” Decker said.
Beta made some spectacular drumming sound effects.   The clock light flickered.
Kirk quickly got to work wiping away the dirt and grime, reading the letters he uncovered.   “B, E, T, A,” he read.   “BETA!” Then he uncovered two more words.   “.    .    .    Video Recorder,” he read.   ” – BETA Video Recorder!”
“I have heard of these,” Spock said.   “They were primitive recording devices used in Earth’s twentieth century.”
“BETA is ready to transmit its information,” Decker said.
“Data, see if you can link it up to our ship’s computers,” Picard said.
“Aye, sir,” Data said, finding a lead and connecting it to the rear of BETA.
“BETA quite liked that,” Decker said.
Ignoring him, Data attached the other end of the lead to one of the ship’s consoles.
“We are ready to receive transmission,” Picard said.
“BETA is unable to transmit,” Decker said.
“Why?”
“Here,” Spock said, examining BETA.   “I think I’ve found the problem.   The pre-record button is still depressed.   If I push that, and then press play…'”
BETA began to transmit.
The Bridge lights flickered haphazardly.   The guitar-like and drumming sound effects were overwhelming.   The Bridge reverberated under the onslaught of special effects.
Troi screamed out.   “It’s horrible!” she cried.   “What I’m sensing is truly horrible!”
“Indeed it is, sir,” Data agreed, as images appeared on the viewer.   “Every episode of Beverly Hills 90210 pre-recorded.   Melrose Place, Thirty-something…oh no!    Doogie Howser M.D., too…”
“No wonder your mindmeld with it knocked you out, Spock,” McCoy said.
The Enterprise shuddered, feeling like it was going to tear itself apart.
“What’s happening?” Picard asked.
“BETA is frustrated by its own limitations, Captain,” Spock said.   “I believe it is trying to merge with the ship.”
“No!” Riker said.   He started toward BETA, hoping to smash it.
Spock stopped him.   “No, Commander,” he warned.   “It will merge with you instead if you touch it.”
“We must do something!” Picard said.
“Decker, look at that,” Kirk said.
“At what?” Decker asked, looking around.
“Over there.” Kirk pointed.
Decker looked away.
Then Kirk pushed him into BETA.
There was an incandescent flash of blinding light.   It encompassed the entire ship, then faded slowly, slowly, until all ship’s systems had returned to normal.   On the viewer, there was a ball of white light;   quickly, it sped away into nothingness.
“Clever thinking, Admiral,” Picard commended.
“Yes, it was,” Kirk agreed.   “Once again I save civilization as we know it.”
“So Decker’s merged with yet another form of consciousness,” McCoy said.
“It would appear so,” Spock said.
“But I don’t understand,” Crusher said.
“What’s that?” Kirk asked.
“You pushed Decker.   I thought he was protected by an energy field that was activated any time somebody tried to attack him…” Crusher’s voice trailed off with the response she received.
From Kirk, Spock, and McCoy came a loud and unified, “Sshhh!” The Enterprise 1701-D crew looked quite and utterly astonished at being shushed by three such veterans.
“What’s wrong?” Riker asked.   “What is it?”
“That’s Major Flaw and Pot Hole in the Script Number #1,” Spock said.   “You’re not meant to pick that up.   You’ll learn that when you get onto the Big Screen.”
“Oh, sorry.”
“It’s quite all right.”
“I think it’s about time we started back.   Mr. Crusher,” Picard said, “set course heading for Earth, Warp 9.”
“Course heading Earth, sir,” Wesley complied, “Warp 9.”
“Go!” Picard ordered.
And the Enterprise started its long haul back to Earth.

April 4th, 1993.
Silk.

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Star Trek: Genesis of Command, Intro and Table of Contents

Genesis of Command
Book 1
The Mighty, Mighty Marek

 

Introduction
1    In The Beginning
2    Cell Structure
3    Visitation Rights
4    Executive Decisions
5    Information, Preparations, and Lacking
6    The No-Win Battle
7    Unacceptable Propositions
8    Rethinking
9    Meetings
10    Confrontations
11    Resolutions
12    Ancient History

Introduction

There is no Kirk and crew, no Picard, nor even an Enterprise.  There is, at first, no link to the past, or anything familiar.  All things are unfamiliar, which is the entire point of this story.
The story begins with a young man who goes to sleep; a long sleep.  This is the story of a future that does not look hopeful.  This is the story of comfortable things, like an old boot, that suddenly become uncomfortable, like finding a scorpion in that old boot.
This story is another beginning; the calm before the storm.  The clouds are not yet seen, yet they will appear, all too soon.  When the clouds appear it will mark the darkest hour, and not just for the Federation.  Forgotten elements come into play.  And, the final frontier, at long last, shall be explored.
He was born in the Earth year 2287.
From lifelessness comes life.
He is the most dangerous man alive.
From darkness comes light.
His name…, Marek.
It is time to journey beyond the next generation.

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Star Trek: Genesis of Command, Chapter 4

Chapter 4
Executive Decisions

Dan Soobzokov (Zoe’ob-zoe-kov) walked onto the small bridge.  Ricardo Gamez was sitting in the captain’s chair.
“What’s new, Rick?”
“Hiya, Dan.  A whole lot of nothing.  And, by that, I mean nothing works.  All I can tell is that nothing is wrong.”
Dan sat in the counselor chair.  “Come again?”
“Well, I showed up this morning and no one’s here.  So I start going through the checklist.  Everything looks fine, but then I tried to access a few systems.  Communications are out.  Sensors work, but can’t be accessed.  I can get exterior views on the main screen, but not inside.  Because the sensors are out I have no idea where we are, or what the course is.  The, ugh, biosensors are out; I have no idea who is on board, or if anyone is alive or dead.  But, and this is weird, all diagnostics work.  I’ve been doing that for almost twenty minutes.”
Dan scratched the back of his neck.  “You mean, everything works, but … nothing works?”
Ricardo thought for a second.  “Yeah.  Yeah, that sounds right.”
*
Jack Windsor stooped down, inspecting the area Ann had been working in when Marek found her.  He could tell something unusual had happened, but was not sure what.  He dabbed his fingers in one of the several tiny pools of blood.  Sniffing it, thinking he might be able to tell what it was, he tried in vain to determine what it was.  Rolling it with his thumb, he became more certain it was blood.
He wiped the blood on the leg of his jumpsuit.
He walked to the room designated a medical center in his usual stoic manner.  Majil was there, in one of the two beds.  The first shirt had a sleep inducer on his forehead, but did not look injured.  Obvioiusly not the source of the blood in engineering.
“May I help you, Chief?” Temmit asked.
Jack turned.  He looked at Temmit, then looked him over.  Without saying a word he started looking around the room.  Not looking back, he said, “I found some blood in engineering.  I was wondering if you might know why.”  He looked directly into Temmit’s eyes only after he had finished talking.  He did not move the slightest bit.
The short Vulcan maintained his composure.  “I was not aware there was any blood in engineering.  No do I know whose it might be.  I suspect the cause was the intruder we received during third shift.  He appears to be very dangerous.”
Jack was silent for a moment.  “Communications to the captain.  Skipper?”  Nothing.
Temmit sighed.  “Our intruder has somehow disabled our internal functions.  Communications are not functioning.”
“What about weapons?”  His stare had begun to wander, again.
“All weapons are useless.  The intruder has disabled them as well.”
Jack wandered out the door, without saying a word.
*
Ann was pacing while Marek sat on her bunk, looking at the book titles closest to him.  “I think you should sit down.”
“I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not.  You went into shock.”
“I d—on’t think so.”
“Really?  Why do you think I shaved for you, then?”
“What!?”  She stopped pacing, faced him, and planted fists on her hips.
Marek went to the next shelf of books.  “Oh, yeah.  I was holding your hand and you touched my check and said, his went higher, “’you shaved for me!,’” he waved a hand in the air, “or somethin’ like that.”
“You’re crazy.”  Ann went back to pacing.
“Actually, I thinik you are.  Do you wonder if you’re crazy?  Ever?”
Ann nervously laughed.  “Ha!  My sanity is beyond question.”
“Oh, I heard if you question your own sanity it indicates some sort of higher understanding, and crazy people can’t do that.  Or won’t.”  He looked up at Ann, “I think about that all the time.”  He smiled and went back to the books.
Ann was quiet.  Marek felt very self-satisfied, knowing the silence was her admission of shame.  He thought it was odd he would think such a thing, but still smiled inside.
He turned from the book he was holding, wanting to see the expression on Ann’s face.  Things were moving very slowly.  (It must have been the surprise of him being proven right.)  He knew Ann was crestfallen, yet he had the sensation she was happy.  He also knew she was standing just a few feet from him.
He must have been daydreaming, because he imagined Ann raising a stick of some kind.  That was silly, though, since she was so happy.  He could even see her smiling.
‘She is smiling, isn’t she?’ he wondered.
The reality was that they were both in a good mood, with no care in the universe.  But Marek could not understand why he was imagining Ann swinging a stick at him.
He raised his right arm in his daydream, just to be safe.
Pain shattered the illusion.  Ann had broken Marek’s arm; the (field hockey) stick had been stopped less than a hand span from cracking Marek’s skull.  Instinctively, Marek followed the block with a counter attack.  Before he could pull back, he felt his left palm loosen the teeth in Ann’s mouth.  Nothing broke, except flesh.  Blood began pouring out of her mouth when she tried to say something.
Marek stood up, to yell at her.  “Y– …, oh, this hurts.”  Ann watched him begin to lose balance, but she was beginning to lose her own.  “You,” he paused to blink, to regain composure, “are going to take me to sickbay, or whatever you have, and I don’t want any more nonsense.  Do you understand?”
Ann was holding her mouth with both hands, blood dripping through her fingers.  “Dyew may me buy my tmm.”
Marek figured out what she said, then said, “I’ll make you buy more than your tum, if you ever try that again, young lady.  Now, turn around and lead the way.”
*
The Skipper had awakened a little before.  She had cleaned up, dressed, and was on her way to the bridge.  The door opened.  She stepped into the hall.  Ann and Marek were doing the same, at the far end of the hall.
She was going to say something, but didn’t.  Instead she calmly walked down, took each by an arm, and escorted them to the medical center.
En route, Marek said, “I’m a very dangerous person, you know?  You should remember that.”
She rolled her eyes.  “You can be dangerous after we take care of that arm.”
Ann was silent, but Marek swore he could hear her think, ‘bun of a sitchen, blimey sastered.’
*
The medical center was on deck four, the bridge was on deck two, and the quarters were on deck three.  But there were more than one way to get to them, even on this small a vessel.  While the Skipper was taking Ann and Marek down, Temmit was following Jack “Windy” up to the bridge.
The doors to the bridge opened.  Dan and Rick were too busy in a conversation to notice.
“ … through the door, then back again.  And I ask her where she’s going.  She says she thinks she may have left her clothes in her own room, so she wants to go get them.”
“Excuse me,” Temmit interrupted.
Dan turned to see them.  “Oh, look, it’s the brain surgeon and the brain donor.”
“And it’s up to you to figure out who we mean.”  Rick added.  “Could you two hold it down, please?  I want to finish this, so my partner can change the names, and use it to further his own ego.”
Dan turned his attention back to the story.  “Was she still holding the towel, or had she dropped it yet?”
“Gentlemen?” Windy asked, politely.
“I thought I changed that to a doily.”
“Gentlemen?”
“No, it was a towel.”
“Gentlemen, please.”
“I think the doily would add something, don’t you?”
“Gentlemen!”
Dan stood up.  “Windy, go blow away!  I am trying to learn something useful.”
Temmit stepped forward.  “Have the two of you noticed anything unusual?”
Rick turned his head.  “For this tub of rust?  No.”  He looked up at Dan.  “I think I like you in pumps.  I get neck strain when you wear heels.”
“Oh, if only you meant that.”  Dan sat back down, ignoring Windy and Temmit.
Windy looked at the floor.  “I saw Mr. Majil in the medical center.  He had four broken vertebrae in his mid back.  One was shattered, so he has to wait for a surgeon to help him.  He may not be able to walk for six months, if we cannot help him in time.”
“Hmm,” Rick mused, “this bucket has no turbolift.  If poor, widdle first shirt can’t walk, then …,”
Dan interrupted, “he can’t get to the bridge.”
Rick grinned, “And?”
“And?  And …,”  Dan grinned, “he won’t be able to give us any orders for at least six months.”
Rick took a deadpan take at Temmit.  “If this guy is trying to get us to mutiny, I think you just talked us into it.”
Dan eagerly asked, bouncing in the counselor’s chair, “Do you know where we can sign up?”
*
Ann was laid out on the other table, a sleep inducer on her head.  A face mask covered her mouth and nose, without straps, with a few colorful lights blinking meaninglessly, and it was not connected to anything.  All new to Marek.
Marek was sitting on a stool, holding his arm next to his chest.  The black uniform blouse was draped over Majil’s legs (against amused protest from the Skipper).  He had a snug fitting short sleeved turtleneck undershirt.  He did not have much muscle mass, yet the mass he had was very well toned.  Unexpectedly, and deceptively hidden by the uniform, was a solid chest.  More than a hundred centimeters of prime rib.  The Skipper knew the chest was more important to overall strength than the size of one’s arms.
“That should stabilize her.”  The Skipper turned her attention to Marek.  His right forearm was bent, with a point toward his chest that was painful to look at.  “I don’t know what I can do for you.  Our holodoc has something wrong we can’t pinpoint, and I never set a bone before, not that I would ever want to.”
“I don’t want my arm to heal like this.” Marek said, raising it up a fraction.  The pain in his bulging eyes told the Skipper how much it hurt.  “What’s a holodoc?”
“It’s a holographic medical doctor.  They’re meant to allow starships to continue fixing people up, in case the doctor dies.  Or gets blown to bite-sized chunks.  You know?” she bent one knee slightly, put one hand on her chin, with the other arm supporting it, “the ship’s doctor is most likely going to be in sickbay.  So, if they die, that probably means sickbay got blown into the next world, along with the doctor.  So, ugh, what is the point, you know?”
“April, please,” Marek pleaded, “let’s see this holodoc of yours.  Maybe it can help me set this thing myself.  Who knows?”
She took a breath.  “Okay, I warned you.  Computer, engage emergency holographic doctor program.”
A balding man appeared in the middle of the room, wearing a black and greenish jumpsuit, the likes Marek had never seen.  It intermittently said, “Plea– … ee nature o—the– … gency.”  The image flickered with the gaps in the speech.
“I warned you.  The last time we used this, it kept going back to the beginning of the message.  We fixed that.  But it still has no memory.”  She waved her hands at the flickering image, like a game show girl showing a prize.  “A doctor just like in the good old days; he suffers from Alzheimer’s!”
“Perfect!” Marek blurted out, “He should fit right into this nightmare!”
The Skipper looked hurt.  “Hey …”
“Doctor!  I have a broken arm.  What should I do about it?”  The doctor, between flickers, looked thoughtful.  “I need it set as soon as possible.  It hurts, so I don’t see what waiting will gain me.”
The doctor approached Marek.  The Skipper began stammering.  “Wha–, but–, you, n–, bu–, …”
Marek, holding back the pain, held up his arm for the holograph.  “Ah, what are you worried about?  It’s a hologram.  All it can do is …,”  The holodoc had Marek’s arm in both hands; Marek felt fingers on his arm …, too late. “AAAAaahhhh, that hurts!”
Snap.
Marek stood up, pulling back his, now straight, right forearm.  “Oh, GOD!  That was … NOT visual; that was …!”
April softly said, “Tried to warn you.”
The holodoctor was busily trying to grab for Marek’s arm, so as not to reinjure it.  Marek was pushing it back, or at least, when it was solid.
“Please state the n– …,”
The Skipper held up a hypospray.  “I tried to warn you.”
Marek was watching the doctor, thinking it might try again.  “Stay away from me!”
Phtshhh.  “See you in twenty minutes.”  The Skipper turned to the holodoc.  “This man just broke his arm.  It was recently set.  See that it will heal correctly, while I get an arm brace.”
*
Windy was arguing, in his half-hearted, mousey way, with Rick and Dan (who were compelled to interject jokes and insults).  Temmit was watching the main viewer.  The old Vulcan was intrigued.  The stars he saw were the stars that should be there, but it took him a while to figure out why he had taken notice of them now.
“Quiet!” he shouted.  The three humans went quiet, caused by Temmit’s uncharacteristic volume.  “Excuse me, Mr. Soobosokov, but, do you recognize where we are?  In relation to where we should be?”
Dan studied the screen.  Then, after realization took hold, he answered, “We’re going in the wrong direction!”
Rick jumped up, moving to the helm.  “We are?”  He looked over the instruments.  “We are two light years off course, heading back the way we came.  If we continue on this course, we’re gonna cross into the Klingon Empire in fifteen hours.”
Dan moved to the navigation station, next to Rick.  He touched a few seconds.  Astonished, he leaned very close to Rick’s ear.  He whispered, quietly so the old vulcan could not overhear.  “I have control.  What should we do?”
Rick pushed a few of his own controls; they worked as well, which Dan could easily see.  Louder than he needed to do so, he said, “Nothing is working here, either.”  The two cautiously shared a sideways glance.
Very seriously, Dan said (overly loud), “Yeah.  So, what do we do now?”
Rick turned around.  “Would …. You two … go find the Skipper?”  I don’t know what we can do, but maybe we can do something.  While you go find the Skipper, I mean.”
Dan was a little befuddled by what Rick had said, but tried to follow it up.  Nodding, he said, “Yeah, it looks pretty hopeless.  Maybe she has an override, or something.”
Temmit, if he was suspicious, did not show it.  “You have made a very good point.  This must have been one of your … shared, lucid moments.”  He touched Windy on the arm, escorting him off the bridge.
When the bridge doors had closed, Rick asked, “What do we do?  All I know is the controls were frozen, and now they work.  The freak brothers say there’s a mutiny going on, but I don’t know what to think.  Do you?”
“Well, we are off course,” Dan offered, and “and,”
“And, you as well as I do, the Skipper makes these bizzaroid changes, all the time.  How do we know this isn’t one of her ‘keep the edge’ tests?”
“I don’t!” Dan protested. “That’s why I didn’t give anything away.  So, what do we do?”
“Oh, no.  I asked you first.  No fair changing things on me.”
“Um,” Dan thought, “we have fifteen hours before we cross into Klingon space.  I think we can figure out what to do in half a day, don’t you?”
“You know,” Rick said, changing his somber expression, “that’s why I like you so much.  I don’t have to make the decisions that could get me into trouble.”
“I think you’re coming around.” Dan added playfully.
“Down, tiger.  Now, let me finish my story about the gal in the towel.”
“I thought it was a doily,” Dan offered.
“Thank you very little.  I DO like the doily more …”
*
Temmit was listeninig outside the bridge door.
“What did they say?” Windy asked, quietly.
“It would seem we must convince the Captain to act a bit more sensibly.”
*
The Skipper was waving a whirring hand scanner over Marek’s arm, now in a clear, solid cast, when he regained consciousness.  She glanced up at the scanner dedicated to him.  The arrow began rising to normal range.  He raised himself from the floor, where he had to be treated, for lack of a bed.
“Wow,” she said, “You should still be out for another fifteen minutes.  How do you feel?”
Marek tried to orient himself.  “I, I still …, ugh, feel … woozy.  The, no!” He closed his eyes.  Rick and Dan, unknown to Marek, suddenly lost the control they had reestablished a moment ago.  “Oh, please, let me concentrate.”
“What’s wrong?” the Skipper asked.
“I, I …, I … am having problems concen– … trate– … ing.  I …, I just need … time.”
“Marek?” the Skipper asked, in a motherly way, “What can I do to help you?”
Marek gained a little composure.  Still a little hazy, he said, “Take me to the bridge.”  He mindlessly walked over to his blouse, draped across Majil’s legs.  He turned to the Skipper.  “Please, April.”
She looked at him, understandingly.  “Sure.  Just, this time, take it easy, okay?”
Taking him by the hand, the Skipper led Marek to the bridge.  She took him the short way.
Temmit and Windy had taken the long way down, searching each room for the Skipper.  They went back into the medical center.  When they found Ann unconscious, they took the medical apparatuses off her.  With only a small bruise on her upper lip, she looked fine.
Temmit turned to Windy, who seemed lost.  “Perhaps now we can take control of this vessel again.”
*
“Skipper!”  Rick exclaimed.  “Am I glad to see you.”
Marek walked on the bridge.  Dan, just turning, sat up erectly.  “And, might I add, I am glad to see you, too, mister.”
“Stow it, boys.”  The Skipper led Marek down the (oh, so short, so Marek thought) walk to the command chairs.  The space was barely big enough for two chairs, not three.
“This is it?” Marek asked, as the Skipper took her seat.  “You barely have room for six people up here.  How do you run this thing?”
“We don’t have more than five people up here at any one time, doy.” Rick offered, sarcastically.
“We let more up here, as long as they’re willing to sit on laps.” Dan followed.
“Quiet, all of you.” The Skipper interrupted.  She filled the command chair much … better than Ricardo.  “If I am correct, and I usually am, we are going to have three more joining us on the bridge, any moment.”
Dan leaned over to Rick, then whispered, “I know where the new boy can sit.”
Marek, who had vulcanoid hearing, caught the comment.
Dan felt Marek burning a hole in his neck.  A quick glance verified his … feeling of doom.  “I think he could fill that chair nicely.”
Rick, who felt no such discomfort, grinned.  “I …, you know, I think the reality is funnier than anything I could come up with.”
Ann was walking up the staircase, followed by Temmit and Windy, one on each arm.  She was still groggy from her recent experiences.
“Excuse me, Capta–,” Marek stood up, bowed, and pulled out his commandeered phaser, “Skipper.”  He aimed it at the door of the bridge.
When it opened, he had the weapon trained on Ann, while Temmit and Windy were to her sides.
“Enter.”  Marek had said it so clearly, it had to be heard as an order.  None of the three moved.  “I have this on wide spread.  I can fire faster than that door can close, or faster than either of you could move.”
Temmit looked to the side, while Windy’s eyes began to wander.
Temmit moved forward, and Windy followed.  The door swooshed closed.
Without turning around, the Skipper said, “That would be seven people.”
Windy, with his gaze darting, said, “Skipper, that man is an intruder.  He has injured your first officer, and most likely my assistant.  Now, he has a phaser, and he’s pointing it at us.”
“Actually,” she corrected, “he has it trained on you.”
Temmit noticed she was watching the view screen.  “If I may be so bold, he has taken us off course, and headed us toward certain danger.  He has violated several no less than four interstellar regulations.  Possibly as many as eleven.”
“But, only,” the Skipper corrected, “if the commanding officer deems it to be so.  And, since you have no idea what I said to Mister Marek in private, you have no idea what I have permitted him to do.  Do you?”
Temmit could only see the Skipper watching the view screen.  “No, I do not.”
Marek saw her pupils straining to catch his attention, while her head was facing forward.  He still had the phaser trained on them.  “What do you think I did?”
Temmit waited for the Skipper to say something.  She did not.  “I declare you have gained unlawful entrance aboard this vessel, in the performance of official duty.”
The Skipper spoke up.  “Political asylum is a legal right, and we were not on assignment at the time.”

The Vulcan considered this.  “He then attempted to commandeer this vessel.”
Marek was faster this time.  “That is a question that only the … Skipper can answer.  And,” he took a breath, “she has not made a definitive declaration, either way.”
Temmit spoke faster.  “You have an unauthorized weapon aboard a United Federation vessel, and a mission does not indicate validation; you are guilty.”
The Skipper shrugged her shoulders.  Marek kept his eyes on Temmit, since Windy was preoccupied with the far wall.  “As I recall,” he started cautiously, “Ann tried to fire this same weapon.  It … never fired.  So far as you know, I’m holding a toy.”
The Skipper chuckled, as softly as she could.
Marek continued, “Do you want to test me?  I am very dangerous, by all indications.”
Temmit straightened himself to his full, complete, short stature.  “You assaulted an officer.  There is no possibility of you hiding the damage to his back.  Even if you erased the computer records, the vertebrae are still damaged.”
“And if he disappeared?” Marek asked.
“I believe,” April butted in, “even if we can’t see them now, that the onboard security will show that it was self-defense.  Could you explain to me the case where self-defense was prosecuted, Mister Temmit?  Even in a fatality case?”
Temmit was silent.
“Let me see if I got this,” Rick pondered aloud, “this guy, escaping political persecution, who has not high jacked us, who has not attacked us, …”
“Except in self-defense,” Dan added.
“And, who hasn’t done, really, anything else, is some kind of bad guy, who we need to stop?”
Marek kept the phaser aimed at Temmit, not knowing what the setting was, much less the spread.  It dawned on him, just at that moment.  If he can talk to a large computer why not a small one?  A half microsecond later, and Marek knew he had a low stun, narrow beam on the aged Vulcan.  As shot might have stung him, even at his age, but not much more.
“I say we take a vote.”  All eyes fell on the Skipper, even Marek’s.  “I’m an easygoing person,” she said defensively.  “We head the reasons against him.  Now, I think we need to hear what we have in favor of him.”
Marek, who had resumed glaring at Temmit (Windy had begun a mental conversation with the wall directly behind him), incredulously gawked at the Skipper.
“Dan?”
“Yes, Skipper?” he responded crisply.
“Why is this boat named the Dahlquist?”
“Because once we finish one dull quest, we begin the next dull quest.”
“Mister Gamez,” she asked, “what happens to a crew when they have been abducted by a terrorist, or group of terrorists?”
He began laughing.  “They get at least a month of shore leave, plus extras, if it’s a civilian vessel involved in a government something-or-other.”
Marek, finally seeing what the Skipper was getting at, said, “And this is a civilian ship, even if it is on military duty.”
“Bango!” she called.
Marek had a feeling ‘bango’ was wrong, somehow.
“So,” she continued, not noticing Marek had reached a hand toward Ann.  Temmit was terrified, for a Vulcan, or Marek, so he stepped away from Ann.  Marek touched the bruised spot on her mouth.  The Skipper asked, “who is in favor of adding Marek as a …,”she made quotation marks with her fingers in the air, “temporary crew member?”
Rick waved his hand.  “I need to know something, first, before I vote.  Did he actually do anything, in your opinion, I mean, oh, most skilled of Skippers?”
She turned, seeing Marek pulling back from Ann.  “No, not that I would testify to.”
“Ladies and gentlemen,” Temmit interrupted,  “the executive officer has sustained real injuries.  Our captor, who is the only one holding a weapon, is the only suspect.  Since it was he who informed me where to find his victim, and no one else can utilize communications, internal or external, I submit he is very powerful, dangerous, and, therefore, untrustworthy.  To give him a vote of confidence is tantamount to suicide.”

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Star Trek: Genesis of Command, Chapter 3

Chapter 3
Visitation Rights

Marek had been in the fetal position for almost half an hour.  He heard someone come in twice, presumably to check the problem he had created with the monitor.  He did not want to risk the chance security would bring in a secondary monitoring system, so he opted to stop affecting the primary system.  At least until a few seconds before his transport out.
Most of that half hour was spent reading recent history.  His situation was not promising.  He had been in cryogenic sleep for one hundred forty-four years, eighty-two days.  All the advanced, experimental, and theoretical technology he had learned about was useless.  Most became commonplace seventy years or so after he disappeared.
The common earth year was 2450.  ‘Buck naked, in the twenty-fifth century.’
Optimum transporter range was fast approaching.  In the world of the ship’s computers that meant he had an hour.  But not wanting anyone to sneak up on him, he had to give part of his concentration to the real world, which meant he had about two minutes.
He thought up a few more ways he might be detected escaping, carefully, as he could, checking how to hide such evidence.  The ship’s deflectors were down, a common practice.  The computer would fail to log the beam out, as well as send an overload surge throughout the ship.  The overload would block internal sensors for 1.3 seconds, without damaging anything.
He felt the Dahlquist approaching.  He saw the transporter controls.  The coordinates would match.  Beam into space from Morass, then the Dahlquist would beam him onboard.  The chance of failure was 13.98%; Marek’s lucky number was fourteen.
Acceptable odds, considering he truly believed he would die if he went back to Earth as a prisoner.  And, if not die, then something worse.  He would be a lab rat.
Brig interference.  Power surge.  Energize.
*
“Skipper, the transporter just came on.”
A rather heavy, medium-light hued African woman turned to her right.  “Is there anyone on the transported deck?”
The very serious, balding, thirty-something Asian man answered, “No one is scheduled to be on that desk.  I am checking internal scan–,” he paused, “scanners are now offline.”  He began tapping functions out, as the Skipper watched, more curious than concerned.  “It would seem the internal systems have crashed.  I can’t remember ever experiencing this before.”
The Skipper rolled her eyes.  “You spent the last ten years with the Starfleet, that’s why. When you have an endless supply of everything, the most down time you have is when you do it on purpose.  The real world is a little different.”  She got up from her command chair, which seemed to tilt to the left slightly.  “Welcome to the world of no priority.  Find the problem, if you can, and fix it.  Then come and wake me up, if it’s important.”
With an audible yawn, she walked off the tiny bridge.
*
Marek had just checked the whereabouts of the crew, then disabled the internal communications.  He tried to think of what else to do, but really had no idea.  He hand never escaped anything before, and his training never included this scenario.
He had succeeded in escaping an outdated starship, getting inside a rusting, defenseless boat, shutting down a computer destined to crash anyway, and not much more.  He still had no idea what he was going to do in the long run.
‘Well, I take over the shi–, boat, and that’ll be easy enough.  But, then what?  Go see Mom, and see if she still has any pull?  If she’s alive that is.  I know no one, have no allies, and no way of knowing what is going on.’
He looked around, for weapons.  Nothing.  So, all he had to take over the boat with was the threat of death through suffocation, since he controlled the life support systems.  And what was to stop the crew from killing him, thinking it was just a bluff from a lunatic?
‘I have to get their attention, without spooking them too badly.’
An idea.  “Computer, engage self-destruct, ten minute countdown, audible.”
The computer responded in the transport chamber.  “The self-destruct systems are non-operational.”
‘Just perfect.’  “Computer, lockout command codes, on my order.  Then make a ship-wide announcement, as follows:  All functions have been shut down; the commanding officer is ordered to meet in the main transporter room, for terms of surrender.”
Marek wondered what he was going to do next.  Being a trained killer was easy.  Being a fugitive was not.  He would not allow mistakes as a Marine.  However, his choices for his own life were another story.  This was definitely in the latter category.
He thought, ‘Maybe I should have waited,’ as the computer made its announcement.
*
A plain-looking woman in a filthy, baggy jumpsuit was waiting outside the transporter room when the Skipper showed up.  The Skipper sighed when she saw the phaser in the grubby woman’s left hand.
“What setting is that …,” yawn, “weapon on, Ann?”
“Kill, Skipper.”  She said it very casually, almost upbeat.
“Why?” the Skipper asked flatly.
Ann’s forehead wrinkled, and she took on an angry air, sounding much like an angry mother.  “Because I don’t intend to lose my engines to a nutcase!”
The Skipper looked at the floor, then back up at the transporter room door.  “Ann,” she began sympathetically, “we don’t even know if there is anyone in there.”
“There is,” Ann interjected.
“it could just be another computer glitch.”
“It’s not.” Ann’s voice rose, slightly.
“Who knows.”
“I do.”
“Windy might have forgotten his medications again.”
“He didn’t.” Ann was speaking quite loud, now.
“Remember before the implant?  He thought you were a Dominion spy.”
“You – are – not – listen – ing!”  Ann shouted.
“You!,” the Skipper yelled back, “are out of line, Mister!”
“Captain Roberts!”  Ann protested.
The Skipper raised a finger to Ann’s face.  “Not another word.  YOU are not even in charge of those engines; Windy is.  And, while I’m reminding you of what you are not in charge of, that’s my weapon, or have you forgotten my short list.  I let you people get away with a lot of things, but not murder.  Not while I’m in command.  And if you ever want that promotion, you will do exactly as I say.”
Ann pursed her lips.  Her eyes went left while her lips (followed by her nose, sort of) went right; then she switched sides.  Her head tilted down slightly as she looked back at the Skipper.  With her lips still tightly packed, she said, “O-”, then smiled, “kay.”  Ann held the smile, waited, and cocked her head, raising her eyebrows.  She look exceedingly goofy.
‘I hate when she does that.’ the Skipper thought.  With a second sigh, she asked, “So, what do you know that I don’t”
Conversationally, she answered, as if they had not just had a spat, “There is someone inside.  He is very serious about taking over Dahlquist.  I don’t know who he is.  And, because he is highly agitated, I can’t tell why.  But, I do know, he is very dangerous.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because, every now and then, he acts exactly like a trapped animal.  He’s ready to kill, in order to escape.
The Skipper thought quietly, staring at the door.  “If that’s the case, set your gun on heavy stun.  Just in case, you know.  Oh,” the Skipper’s voice lifted, “those are my engines, not yours; I just let you work on them.  Open the doors.”
Marek was standing on the far side of the control console, his arms in front, hands hidden from view.  The Skipper walked calmly through the doors, followed by Ann, who pointed the phaser at Marek.  “Captain Roberts and Petty Officer Phillips, I presume?”
“I prefer to go by Skipper, if you don’t mind.  And you are …?”
“Marek, formerly of the Federation Marine Corps.”
“Marine?”
“I told you he was dangerous.”  Ann input.
The Skipper glanced back at Ann, diligently aiming the phaser at their captor/prisoner.  “Mr. Marek, there is no Marine Corps.”
“I suppose, how do I put this,” he said, sarcastically, “that cryogenics stopped working before you were born?  And, by the way, Miss Phillips is correct.  I am very dangerous.”
“Um,” the Skipper paused for dramatic effect (or, perhaps outsarcast Marek), “if you are a throwback to barbarism.”
“Skipper!” Ann burst in, warningly.
The Skipper waved her off.  “If you are fresh from the freezer, then how would you be able to, poof!, show up here, without being detected?  You would have to be a hundred years old, making you a technical moron.  And, in that case, there would be no way for you to take over my boat.”  She let her words sink in.  ‘Am I wrong?”
“Only partially.”  Marek smiled sideways.  “I was the victim of a … special training program.  Basically, I was in an experiment gone wrong.”
“Which means what to me?” the Skipper asked.
“Which means that I can talk to computers,” Marek began.
“Everybody can talk to computers,” Ann interrupted.
“Really?”  He was very smug.  “Go ahead, then.  Talk to the computer.”
Ann looked at the Skipper, who shrugged her shoulders.
“Computer,” Ann said, waiting for a response.  She cleared her throat.  “Computer, respond.”  But, nothing happened.
“Would you like to try, Skipper?” Marek asked.
She smiled.  “Communications, general announcement, all crew members are to arm themselves …” Something was wrong.  The announcement should have been made over the communications system, but all was quiet.  “Ann, shoot him.”
There was a soft clicking sound.  “Uh-oh.” Ann adjusted the weapon.  A second click, and that was all.
Marek took a deep breath.  “Computer, are all energy weapons, replacement components, and replicators offline?”
“Affirmative.”  Said the computer.
Marek smiled.  “I seem to be the smartest moron aboard, Skipper.”
“If I might be so bold,” a new voice said, “the term ‘moron’ is quite inappropriate.”  A rather small, and age weary Vulcan walked next to Ann.  She still had the useless phaser trained on Marek.  “I do not believe you will be needing this.”  he said, as he gently, yet resolutely took the weapon from her.
Marek seemed transfixed on the small Vulcan, who found him as intriguing.  “You don’t look right, Mister.  Do you have … ah,” he tried to recall the name, “zing’call?  No, ka—zhing’call, right?”
The old Vulcan slipped the phaser into the folds of his dark robe.  “K’tsung’cah.  I am allergic to certain types of radiation.  My skin should be much darker.  But your skin problem is much more difficult than mine.”
Marek was put on guarded.  “What skin problem are your referring to?”
“You are obviously human.  However, your eyebrows are very much vulcanoid, indicating a parent with vulcanoid blood.  However, your jaw, cheek, and brow are not necessarily human or Vulcan.  Which leaves me with only one option: you are part romulan.”
“This just got really weird.”  The Skipper put her hands in the air, stepping into the middle of the room.  ‘I have a tomboy engineer with psychic powers warning me about an intruder.  The intruder is running away from something, can talk to computers, and wants to kill everybody.  Then, if that isn’t enough, Temmit, Mister spooky Vulcan comes out from his hole, to let me know my homicidal intruder is part romulan.  Now, that explains the wanting to kill everyone, and running from whoever bit, since nobody in their right mind likes the Romulan Empire.  But, and help me figure this one out, okay?, … I, … I, … me, I, I am captain of this boat.  What is going on?  And, since he was kind enough to be the cause of all this, I think Mr. Marek should be the one to begin.”   She put her hands to her hips, leaned her head to one side, and waited for Marek to speak.
Ann and Temmit looked at Marek, too.  He felt even more out of place than before.  Finally, he said, “Well, I was part of an experiment last century.  The experiment, so it would seem, succeeded, to a certain degree.  I think the Federation has a reason to have me killed, so I would like to avoid that, if I can.  Since I am here, and you would have difficulty disposing of me, I intend to take over this vessel to effect my escape.”
Everyone seemed content with that.  With what they had to go on, what he said, in a manner of speaking, made sense.
“Um,” Ann asked, “where do you want to escape to?”
Marek had been taken off guard by that.  He  scrunched his eyebrows together, let his head sag back, and jaw slip open.  He looked very stupid.  “I have no idea.”
Ann turned and walked out, saying, “I think the term moron applies now.”
*
The Skipper had escorted Marek to a stateroom.  There was no point in standing around the transporter room.
As a show of his ability, Marek sprang on Temmit just after Ann left.  Evidently, he had been hiding a pipe, over a meter in length.  Before he could react, Temmit was face to face with Marek.  The pipe had been swung like a sword, stopping so close to the old vulcan’s head he nearly fainted.  Marek then asked him to give up the phaser he had taken from Ann.
“Does this room have a replicators?”
“No,” the Skipper answered, “because this vessel is so small.  We have two replicators in the dining room, one in medical, and one in the lab.  The one in the lab is the largest, so we get our replacement parts from there.”
“You shouldn’t use replicated parts.  They tend to degrade.”
“We’ve come a long way since your time.  But, just so you know, we don’t replicate vital components unless it’s an emergency.  Then, if we do, I get everything checked as soon as we hit port.”
They settled down to a table in the larger of the two rooms.  Marek looked uncomfortable, fidgeting and looking around the floor.
“Is there something wrong?” the Skipper asked, in a friendly way.
“Well, I just don’t feel right calling you ‘Skipper’, since I’m not part of your crew.  Is there another …,”
“April.”  She smiled.  “Just don’t call me Captain, alright?”  She waited for Marek to respond, but he seemed preoccupied.  “Is there something I can do for you?”
Marek shook his head.  “No.  Yes!  Eh, no.  No.  I, I’m listening to the computer, watching the crew.  Temmit is having trouble seeing everything at once.  I never had this trouble when I was asleep.  I, I –, I’m just so confused.  I can’t —, hear, see, ah, no, watch everything.  Ah —.”
April sat helpless, watching Marek’s face churn in agony.  He looked on the verge of tears.  She grabbed his hand.  “Go to sleep.”  Her glare fixed on him, and she waited until he looked up.  “I won’t let anyone bother you until you wake up, okay?  I promise.”
Marek was trembling. Sweat was forming on him.  But something was calming him down.  Her eyes, perhaps, or something behind them.  He had … a feeling.  “Why? Why would you make a promise like that?”
She smiled again.  “What else am I going to do?  I don’t have anything else to do right now.  And you’re the most exciting thing that happened to this tub since I took over.”
Marek laughed.  He seemed to relax, even letting out a yawn.  The Skipper remembered that she was tired as well.
“Ugh, Marek?”
“Yes?”
“I need to get some sleep.  Now, I can get a lot more done if I had a little control.  This room has a manual lock, plus you have my phaser toy to play with.  How about you give me internal communications?  I promise no one will bother you.’’
Marek laid his head on the table.  His hand was still in April’s.
“Marek?”  No response.  She got up, pulling her hand slowly away from his.  “Computer,” she looked at Marek again, “dim lights.”  She half expected nothing to happen, but the lights dimmed.
She walked out the door, leaving Marek alone.  She gave several orders along the way to her own room.  The first was to lock Marek’s room.  She figured, once he woke up, he could open the door, no matter what she, or anyone else, did.  She was so tired, though, she did not much care.
*
He was on a beach, at the base of a cliff.  Though he had never been there, it was very familiar.  He had been there often.  It was a place of sorrow, but not yet.
He looked up and saw her.  She was dressed in a flowing dress, like waves of silvery vanilla blowing in the wind.
His heart rate went up, and he had to swallow.  It was one of the most important days of his life.  He fought back the tears, because he was not the only one waiting for this moment.  They were all there with him; the lost, the forgotten, and the dead.  It was too much.
He had to blink, hard, to hold back the tears.
When he opened his eyes and looked up he saw the woman leap from the cliff.
He tried to blink the tears away again, but failed.
It was the most wonderful day of his, or any other, life.
He embraced the lady in silvery white.
*
The blackness of space was like a blanket.  Emotion was behind.  Peace was here.
There was an explosion.  The stars, or the peace, began to melt away.
A familiar female voice sounded very sad.  “You let this happen.  Save us; make it all right again.”
“No!”  he cried.  “I was still too small!  I couldn’t help!”
“But you can …” she said.
The burden was too great.  “No.”
“Save us.”
He sobbed, “No.  It’s not my fault.”
*
Marek woke, sweat rolling into his eyes.  His heart was beating fast, matched by his breathing.
The room was dark.  He was cramped, from sleeping in a chair.  There was a clean spot on the table his face had been pressed on.
He put his hand on the table, fingers splayed.  “How long have I been asleep?”  His voice was on the verge of panic.
The computer calmly said, “Five hours, seventeen minutes.”
“How many people have been in this room in that time?”
“One.  Roberts, Captain of Dahlquist, left this room and ordered it sealed 14.3 seconds after unconsciousness.”
Marek was confused by this.  “What is the current course?”
“Dahlquist is on course to Deep Space Three. Speed and course has not deviated since the current course was laid in.  Time to DS3 is ninety-seven hours, eight minutes.”
Marek began searching the computer for the whereabouts of the crew.  Nothing seemed out of place.
‘It’s like I wasn’t even here.’ he thought.  “Computer, what is the location of Ann Phillips?”
“Engineering.’ it responded.
Marek looked around the room, spotting a monitor on the wall left of the door.  He put his left hand on the table; the screen flashed on.  The profile of a ‘chubby’ craft, somewhat resembling a seaworthy boat, as well as a dorsal view, appeared.  A flashing dot appeared, in the midsection on the third of the five main decks.  A highlighted path began moving back and down, showing the shortest route to engineering, in the tail of the craft.
Marek got up from the table and stepped toward the door, stopping two paces from it.  He looked down at the beard and prison clothes he was sporting.  Walking over to the monitor, he first looked in the shiny black face, like a dark mirror.  ‘Wow!  No wonder they thought I was crazy.’
He splayed his left hand next to the control pad. With his other hand he pulled back his hair on the back of his head.  There was enough for a short ponytail.  He smiled, just as a new path was being traced on the Dahlquist diagram.  This time the path led up.  His eyes shifted into thought.  The picture changed to show an old style uniform jacket.
A few more things came up, before he departed.
He had not bothered to check to see if anyone would be in the lab.  Since Temmit had stopped trying to override his control, Marek assumed the lab would be empty.
It was an open space, with stations along the roundish walls.  The lab was a rough oval, about ten meters long and six meters wide.  The centered was cratered, with important looking crystal apparatuses inside.  The workstations could accommodate twenty technicians.  Only one was occupied.
“Who are–, he stumbled, “I mea–, w– … .  Identify yourself!”  the man found courage enough to jump to his feet.
Marek calmly walked forward.  “I am the one who took control of this vessel.  Who are you?”
“Lieutenant Commander Barry Majil, first officer of the Dahlquist.  I order you to lay face down, with your arms and legs spread out.”  He took a defensive stance.
Marek walked a little slower.  He wanted this to be embarrassing.  “You graduated Starfleet Academy, with honors, didn’t you?”
Majil smiled, ever watching Marek.  “Yes, I did.”
“Good.”  Marek was almost to him.  “I have been a marine for almost one hundred and fifty years.  No honors, except being deemed expendable.”  He stopped just out of arms reach.  Smiling, he said, “I hate honor grads.”
Majil faked a kick, pushing him forward.  He threw a punch to Marek’s throat.
Marek held up his right hand, catching the punch, twisting it right, and bringing up his left hand.  Majil fell.  As he hit the ground, Marek had Majil’s arm straight, twisted, and his own hand on Majil’s shoulder.
“That was easy.”  Marek let him go, and walked away from the honor grad.
Majil got up, expecting Marek to turn and attack.  He followed Marek to the lab door.  When it was clear Marek was going to leave, fearing he might lose the opportunity, Majil put his hands on Marek’s shoulders, thinking he could pull the hairy beast back, tripping him, and holding him down.
Unfortunately, Marek pivoted, grabbing Majil’s sore right arm.  Marek twisted.  “You should have let me go.”
The pain almost made Majil faint.  Marek lifted him up, expecting to throw the man two, maybe three maters.  With all the strength he could muster, Marek threw the executive officer.
Marek was very surprised when the man smashed two monitors at the far end of the room.  If there had been no wall, Majil would have gone twenty meters, easy.
Marek looked at his hands in shock.  They were the same hands he had always had.  “What did they DO to MEEEeee!”
He looked at the replicators, just right of Majil’s limp body.  “Ann ….  Computer, replicate my uniform, shaver, and hair band.”
The pile of clothing that appeared was midnight black, with silver trim.
*
She let out a slow breath, looking at the palm monitor.  With her left thumb she tapped a few keys; her right arm was buried inside a filthy machine.  She watched a computerized image of a hand, moving toward something.  There was nothing between her hand and what she was trying to touch … on the small monitor.  Her face wrinkled.  “Oh, God, no!”  The hand on the monitor pulled back, trying to fling off an invisible goo.  She took a deep breath and tried again.
“Ann!” Marek frantically called. “Ann, where are you?”
Her hand was almost there when his call distracted her.
“Ann?” he called again.
She turned away, just for an instant.  Pain lit her face.  With a scream of absolute agony, she pulled her arm out.  As she held her hand, blood began to wash the greasy film away.
Marek found his way into the crawlspace she was hidden in.  “Oh, no.  What happened?”  Marek forgot his own problems just then.  He tried to see Ann’s hand.
“NO!  Get aWAY from me!”
“No, let me help …,”
“Go away!” she closed her eyes hard.  Marek could feel tears forming, before they rolled down her cheeks.
“No …,” he whispered.  He put both his hands around Ann’s.  He knew both tips of her middle and index fingers had been cut off, somehow.  He held her hands with his right, looked around, while his eyes darted aimlessly, and placed his left hand on the machinery Ann had her arm in.
He closed his eyes, lowering his head.  Ann had begun to breathe heavily, fighting back the tears of pain.  (She considered tears a sign of weakness.)  Marek began to breathe heavy.  Shortly, he began to let out small breaths, each getting louder.  The breathing became moaning, then sobbing.  All the while Ann’s face showed less and less pain, until there was none.
Marek’s face was pulled tight with pain.  His head was down, his cheeks wet, and his mouth was open, because of the congestion.  He was breathing heavy, which slowed after a few seconds.
Ann pulled her hand free from Marek, wiping his eyes with her fingers.  All of her fingers.  “Cry baby,” she said softly.
Marek came to himself, quickly, yet gently, taking Ann’s hand.  He flattened her fingers, inspecting the creases in the two he thought she had lost.  They were dirty, but intact.
“What are you looking at?” she asked.
“Your fingers,” he said, “they were cut off.  But,”
“You must be stupid.”  Ann pulled her hand free.  “I’m fine, see?”  She held up her hand and wiggled her fingers.
Marek went back to being a cold machine.  He grabbed her hand, twisting the palm to her.  “Then why is there fresh blood pouring down your arm?”
Ann looked at him as if he were crazy.  Then, hesitantly, she looked at her wrist.  Fresh, bright, oxygenated blood was on every part of her hand, except the tips of the index and middle fingers.
“How did you …?”
“I don’t know.  But, before I came down here, I threw your first shirt [Marine slang for executive officer] across the lab.”  He waited for it to sink in.  “Humans aren’t that strong are they?  And neither are romulans, are they?”
Ann looked a little scared.  She nervously shook her head.
“They did something to me.  I don’t know what, but it was something big.  “Now,” he looked down, thinking of what to say next.  “I …, I don’t know what to do next.”  His eyes began to fill.  “What do I do next?”
Ann was shocked.  At last, she said, “We have to help Barry.”  She tried to pull her hand from him, but he squeezed.
“Temmit was called.  Unless I am mistaken, he is in charge of medical, isn’t he?”
Ann nodded.
“Then the only thing you could do is give moral support, right?”
Ann nodded.
Marek feverishly thought of what to say next.  “You’re the only person who can help me right now.”
Ann seemed to be wanderinig.  She lifted her left hand to Marek’s chin.  “Did you shave for me?”
Marek looked to one side, with a look of bewilderment.
*
They made their way to Ann’s room, a few doors down from the room Marek had been asleep in, next to the outside door to the upper observation deck.  There were books of every kind in the bookshelves that covered every wall.  A few shelves were obviously hand made, very unlike the prefabricated shelves.  Yet, as unorganized as it seemed, they were all categorized.  There had to be two thousand books in that tiny room.
“So,” Ann asked, “have you figured out what you want to do?”
marek put his hand on the bulkhead.  The Dahlquist jerked, then steadied.  “I think so.  And, the first thing I want, is what’s in your head.”
Ann took a half step back.

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Star Trek: Genesis of Command, Chapter 2

Chapter 2
Cell Structure
Not surprisingly, Marek materialized in a cell.  Four armed security were there.  A klingon was among them.  He faintly recognized him.  Not that it mattered.
The security team left.  The klingon did not bother to look back.  He would not give the human the pleasure.
Marek pulled himself up.  He was now in a clean, white, loose fitting smock.  He looked for a mirror, but found none.  It was not until now that he cared about what he looked like.
He touched the holes on his face.  He felt the beard, then simply forgot his wounds.  He ran his fingers over the beard.  He pulled it, estimating it was four and a half centimeters.  His hand went to his head.
He was almost shocked to find he had long hair.  Long for a Marine, that is.  Almost six centimeters.  The back of his neck was thick with hair.
“Oh, no.”
The commander walked in.  He stood in front of the cell, looking at Marek.  Marek forgot his hair and stared back.  The pair looked at one another in silence.
The commander began to say, “I don’t know how …”
“You look like A1.”  Marek spoke softly, but filled the room.  Even the distortion from the force field could not squelch his authority.  He was the commander in this conversation.  It was unearthly.
The commander looked Marek in the eyes, then lowered his stare.  He looked up again, not wanting to lock eyes with his prisoner. “His son died, just before you came aboard.  I thought he had gone senile.  He told me about you.”  He looked at Marek, for a second or two.  He looked at the wall.  ‘I am … A1 … great-grandson.”
Marek took a few steps toward the commander.
“If … you are who … my grandpa thinks …, thought, you are, then …,” he looked at Marek, “I have to thank you for my being here.”
Marek stepped as close as he could.  “Then let me out.”
The commander shook his head.  “I can’t do that.”
Marek put his hands to the force barrier.  His hands lit up, against the energy.  He looked just short of frantic.  ‘If the authorities get me, I’m dead!”
“You’re not dead.”  Commander John Walker looked the prisoner in the eye.  “This is the Federation, not some backward, unsophisticated culture.  We don’t kill people, especially our own.”
“Do you KNOW what they DID to ME!?!”  Marek shook, trying to restrain his anger.  Or was it fear?
John micro-leapt back.  He remained calm, but he was terrified inside.  ”You are only going to be detained long enough to determine what should be done with you.”
Marek put his hands down.  His face went blank, completely expressionless.  He stepped backward, staring at Commander Walker the entire time.
‘”Go away.”
Commander Walker stiffened.  Slowly, he turned and walked away.
Finding some spirit, Walker ask, “Did you just tell me …?”
“Go — away.”
Marek’s mouth never moved.
Walker stared at the hair Marine.  Then, quietly, he walked out of the brig.
Marek turned to the closest wall.  He placed an open hand against it, and his expression changed.  Not to a feeling of hopelessness.  He went into deep thought.
Something was happening inside him that he did not understand.  He could feel the ship.  The computer, which was not alive, could be … felt.  Thinking.  No soul, but definite thought.  And there was a kinship.
A lone guard entered the brig.  “Stop moping.”
‘He must think I am destitute.’
“We’ll take good care of you.  The Starfleet won’t mistreat you.  You probably heard some nasty rumors spread by the Dominion, or something.”
‘Not a threat.  Probably sympathetic.  But too stupid to use.’
Computer lock.  “’Hello.’”
The guard stopped patrolling.  “What?”
‘Great.  I thought too loud.  What next?’  “I said, …”  ‘What?’  “I said … hello.”  ‘Sounds good.’  “I haven’t felt myself for … quite a while.”
The guard seemed mollified.  “Don’t I know it.  If I heard it right, you were kidnapped a few years ago.  You can expect to be debriefed, then re-educated.  Should only be a few weeks.”
Central programs accessed.
“I believe you are mistaken, Mr. Ridley.  But I thank you for your encouragement.”
The guard had passed from earshot, checking the rest of the brig.  “What?  I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
‘Thank you for the warning.’
–Long-range scanners have picked up a small vessel.  A nebula pathfinder, named Dahlquist.  It has a crew capacity of twenty-six.  Currently crew compliment is seven:  four command, two engineers, and one specialist.  The Morass will pass just beyond transporter range.- –
‘What are the chances of extreme beam out?’
–None.- –
‘How could I beam from this ship to the Dahlquist?
–Two possibilities exist.  First, move me close to Dahlquist.  Second, couple my transporter with that of Dahlquist.- –
‘Perfect.’  Marek did not have much time, but he had enough.  He could see the controls that worked the Morass transporter.  If the Dahlquist had a similar system, he should be able to access that, too.  He had less than thirty minutes.  But he was not living in the physical world; Marek was in the computer world.  Each thought moved at the speed of light.  These were the fastest computers the Federation had to offer.
The calculations took very little time.  It was done, checked, and rechecked in less than a minute, with a margin of error.
Now for the hard part.  Without a physical link, he needed to disable the Morass, just after transport, without being detected.  Accessing the computer was easy.  Asking a question was easy.  Ten thousand legitimate interactions take place in every work cycle.  But this was technology only thought up when Marek was a child.  Some had yet to be thought up.  He had no idea how to understand it, much less control it.
The computer told him it had a warp core.  Without it, there could be no pursuit.  But that did not mean other ships could not be sent.
‘Computer, suppress the sensor information on the Dahlquist.  Erase all information of the existence of that ship.’
–Information has been erased.  Sensors have been disrupted by an automatic diagnostic.  Sensors shall come back on line in two minutes.- –
‘Great.  In two minutes I have to hide an entire ship, using technology I don’t understand.’  The most advanced technology he had been exposed to was now outdated, by generations.  He thought of using constants; then rejected it; constants are what you try to overcome.  He had to come up with an original idea.  And he had less than one minute, fifty-eight seconds.
‘Can you send all incoming information on Dahlquist to an unmanned, remote station?  Without detection?
–Negative.- –
Hmm.  ‘Has basic sensor technology remained constant for the last century?’
–Affirmative.- –
‘Can the sensors be taken offline, past sensor readings be displayed, then return at a later time?
–Affirmative.- –
‘Without detection?’
–Negative.- –
‘Access all psychological files of personnel scheduled to monitor sensors for the next hour.  What is the highest estimation of detection?’
–… 6.80311582% – –
‘Good enough.  Can the main sensor be down without indication?’
–Affirmative.  The chief engineer has completed sensor testing, and is not scheduled to do so again for three days, ten hours.- –
‘Bring up the most recent sensor readings for this section of space.  When done, take the sensors offline and display the past readings as current.’
–Done.  Sensors offline.  Past readings are being fed to all stations.- –
‘Wow.  Fast.’
–Automatic diagnostic will be completed in forty-five seconds.- –
Marek pulled his hand away from the wall, breaking his connection with the computer.  He was not certain what had just happened was real, or if he was still dreaming in the klingon station.  Humans can not “talk” to computers by touching a wall.
A chirping sound.  “Sickbay.  This is brig security, Lieutenant Ridley.”
“This is Doctor Fargus.  Go ahead, Lieutenant.”
“Sir, I think it is a good idea to …”
Marek casually turned around.
“… send someone down to check on him.”
Marek smiled.  “Check on who? And when did you get back?  You only left a second ago.”
“Sickbay, standby.  Why didn’t you respond to me before?”  The guard was very serious by now; robot like.
Marek’s smile faded.  “They didn’t tell you?  I’m … I’m deaf.  My (think of something) audio implants must have … failed during the cryogenics.  I don’t really ‘listen’ to other people when that happens.  I can … read lips.”
The guard studied Marek.  Doctor Fargus said, “I heard what the guard said, Lieutenant.  Ask him if he wants me to correct his hearing now, or when I give him a physical, would you?”
Marek almost answered.
“Sickbay wants to (he was talking slower, now) know if you want to have your au-di-o implants (and louder) fix – – (‘I wonder if he could make out that word?’) re-paired?  Or can you wait?”
‘Simpleton.’  He could not resist.  Loudly, Marek said back, “Tell — Him — I — Can – Wait!  Thank – You – For – Un – Der – Stand – Ing!”
Ridley seemed confused.
Fargus cleared his throat.  “Eh, Lieutenant, the man is deaf, not stupid.  Go about your business.  I’ll schedule something for tomorrow.”
The chirping sound again.
Ridley finished studying Marek.  He smiled.  ‘So, everyone is worried about some deaf and dumb guy, hunh?’
Marek smiled dumbly.  He was not sure if Ridley had actually spoken those words.  It was safer not to respond.
“Good night, Mr. Dangerous.”  Ridley left the brig, chuckling.
Under his breath, Marek said, “Goodbye, Mr. Observant.”

The doors closed.  Marek was alone, it seemed.  His hearing was actually more sensitive than it had ever been, and he could hear no other prisoners.  Which would explain why Ridley made his rounds so fast.
Marek’s current problem was how to distract the ship during his beam out.  The sensors were easy.  That required very little power.  He would need a great deal of power for the transporter.  If only he could think of how to mask that, he could be on his way back to reclaiming his life.
A lot of power.  That might be it.  What if, instead of trying to make it look like it never happened, he made the ship focus on something that was more important.  Such as a false report of the warp core imploding?  Followed by several other systems coming online, for no apparent reason?
But he would have to keep his disappearance from being detected, or all was for naught.  There had to be a video feed in the brig, to monitor the prisoners.  And someone transporting out would not look good.
Marek went to the cot on the far wall and laid on it, curling up.  He placed his hand on the wall.
‘Computer.’  The thought raced through the metal, to touch the entire ship.
–Yes?- –
‘Computer, I need to know if there is such a thing as a monitor glitch in current technology.  Can the brig’s monitors be obscured so my current position is hidden from view?’
–And artificial disruption can be created, hiding the current position of your body.- –
Marek smiled, sort of.  “Perfect.”

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Star Trek: Title of Liberty, Part I

Star Trek: Title of Liberty
Part I
A short story based upon the series created by Gene Roddenberry
Written by R.J. Herschell

Stardate: 57878.7
Sector 554, near the Cardassian Border
Starbase 334

Rear Admiral Lower Half Thomas Henderson walks out over the Operations Center of Starbase 334.  He had just barely been assigned to this station, along with a minute group of vessels intended to uphold Federation law and maintain the peace.  Sector 554 hadn’t had any dedicated fleet assigned to it since the conclusion of the Dominion War four years ago.  Now, he had been ordered to assume command of what became known informally as the Pike Fleet.  This fleet consisted of one starship, a new kind of a vessel called a cutter, three runabouts and a Type-11 shuttlecraft that Starfleet Intelligence had been screwing around with.
The Pike Fleet is hardly a military force.  In reality, the fleet is a law enforcement agency dispatched to a location where most law enforcement measures were quite inadequate.  Sector 554 was quite rampant with the Orion Pirate Cartel.  They had used their animal women to seduce the major government officials on the three colony planets.  They had an almost endless power there.  Starbase 334 was one of the most dangerous Starfleet outposts because the law did not exist here.  Luckily, due to re-elections in the sector, more professional governors had been elected, allowing stricter laws to be established over the cartels.  Now, Starfleet was placing their final blows on the Orions by assigning this fleet.
Henderson stands in the middle of ops, surveying the stars displayed on the main viewscreen.  He was awaiting the arrival of the final three vessels in his fleet: the USS Zebulon Pike, the USS Wyatt Earp, and the USS Nathan Hale.  The Zebulon Pike is a Galaxy-class warship, one of those uprated versions.  It really wasn’t much good for law enforcement, a bit too powerful for that.  The uprated Galaxies were really good at blowing up stuff.  The Pike’s mission would be to patrol the section of Cardassian-Federation border that ran through Sector 554.
The USS Wyatt Earp is the second of the new Pinkerton-class cutters.  These cutters are fast and powerful.  The Pinkerton-class is especially tailored for law enforcement.  They are about twice the size of a Danube-class runabout, and carry enough firepower to make any pirate crap his shorts.  The Pinkertons have a compliment of eight, allowing room for prisoner transport; but that is not the only kind of personnel they can transport.  With a Grade 3 diplomatic rating, they can carry any diplomat for extended periods of time.  This is quite convenient in diplomatic situations when a huge starship would cause undue tensions.  Yet, the Pinkertons do not sacrifice security in these situations, which tend to be a powder keg.  If they absolutely have to, they can fight their way out of any fix.
The Pinkerton vehicles also feature a sickbay.  While there is no dedicated doctor, this can serve as additional crew quarters or medical evacuation volume.  The Pinkertons value to Starfleet lies in their ability to be deployed on any mission without the module-swapping the Danube-class runabouts have to go through.
The USS Nathan Hale, appropriately named after probably the most famous American spy, is a Type-20 Shuttlecraft.  Essentially, a Type-20 is a Type-11 that has a dedicated crew of five, and has been outfitted with enough weaponry to make it a considerable opponent in battle.  She is a stealthy vessel, built to slip behind enemy lines and gather information unnoticed.  Her role in law enforcement, being able to follow pirate vessels right to their base, is invaluable.  Her entire crew comes from Starfleet Intelligence; they are some of the best officers in the United Federation of Planets.  That crew is very professional, very dedicated, very trustworthy, and very intelligent.  Admiral Henderson looks forward to working with these individuals.
The Operations Center of Starbase 334 is rather confined.  There are fifteen officers in this Center, all accomplishing various tasks.  They move about the diamond shaped room running reports and collaborating on their various tasks.  The dull roar they make can be compared to a bar on a weeknight.  Their stations are arranged into three tiers, formed into a V, with the opening of the letter aimed at the viewscreen in the front corner.  Down the point, or rather where the point should be, is an aisle, allowing officers easy access to the other tiers as they accomplish their business.  At the very back of Ops, right under the Federation Seal painted above a systems panel installed in the back corner, is a single stand-alone station.  This is the Commander’s Information Providence station.  The CIP was built with the intent of providing the commanding officer all the information he or she needed without disturbing any of the Ops Center crew.
Directly in front of the CIP, one step down from the uppermost tier is a rather large and comfortable-looking chair.  This, of course, is the command chair.  This chair has been unoccupied for four years, as the Commander of the Starbase had a station to the right of the CIP, and the Executive Officer in the tier immediately in front of the Commander.  Its purpose was to accommodate any visiting admiralty, such as a sector commander.  Admiral Henderson stands in front of this chair, watching the bustle in Ops.
Thomas turns around and proceeds to stand behind the CIP.  He surveys the controls for a second, and then calls up the assigned patrol routes for the Pike fleet.  The computer places this map on the main viewscreen, but nobody pays attention, too wrapped up in their work.  Henderson had a perfectly fine view of this map on the CIP, and had no reason to look up at the viewscreen.  After assuring himself that this was to his satisfaction, he restores the viewscreen and sits in the Admiralty chair.  There was absolutely nothing to do while he waited.
“Admiral,” Captain Sara James, the commander of Starbase 334, was standing to the Admiral’s right, “I think you would like to know that the Zebulon Pike will be here in five minutes.  They are ferrying the Nathan Hale as well.”
“Thank you, Captain.  As soon as they arrive, I would like to meet with the command staff of both vessels in the situation room.”  Henderson responded to the petit, attractive Captain.
“I will have Military Comm pass it on.”  She acknowledged and proceeded to the upper tier, on the left hand side of the bridge, next to the CIP.  She leaned over and whispered in the ear of an ensign seated there.  Then returned to her station, reflected over the centerline of the bridge from the station she was just at.
Admiral Henderson stood and began walking towards a door set in the forward right-hand wall of the Ops Center.  There are four doors, one on each wall of the room.  The forward right leads to what is called the Situation room.  The fore-left leads to a hallway that ultimately leads to the turbolifts and a couple of conference rooms.  The aft-left leads to Admiralty office, derelict since the conclusion of the Dominion War, and the aft-right leads to the CO’s office, or ready room.  Stepping over the threshold of the door, Henderson entered the situation room.
The ambient lighting of this room is quite dark.  There is one large screen on the other side of the room.  Around the room, set into the union between the bulkhead and the overhead, are several screens.  Most of them are off.  Some are displaying random data concerning matters the Admiral couldn’t care less about.  In the middle of the room is a table with various screens and LCARS interfaces set in it.  During a crisis situation, officers and commanders would be crowded around this table keeping an eye on the situation and commanding it.  This room’s purpose is to separate the bustle of running a situation from the bustle of running the station.  In front of the large screen are two long tables, one set in front of the other.  Each table has seating for eight, and a small LCARS panel in front of each seat.  This was for briefing personnel about to take command in the field.  To the left of those being briefed, that is the viewscreen’s right, is a station dedicated to operating this screen.  Here the presenter can stand to present crucial information to the commanders.
Set in the bulkhead next to the door leading to the bridge are several large screens showing the status of the station, most of them inactive.  Henderson moves to one of the operational panels, and brings up the lights.  Proceeding to the presenter’s station, he activates the presentation screen.  He puts the sector map he was looking at on the bridge on that screen, and then sat patiently behind the presenter’s station.  He waits for the command crew of the Zebulon Pike and the Nathan Hale.
A door adjacent to the aperture leading to the bridge opened, and four officers entered the situation room.  Glancing around for a second; one of the captains motioned towards the two long tables and led the other three to the front row.  Henderson started from his position before they had a chance to sit down.
“I am Admiral Thomas Henderson, sector commander.”  He introduced himself in a friendly businesslike tone.
“Captain Rachel Erickson, Admiral,” one of them responded, extending her hand.  She was about Tom’s height, with what looked like could be long brown hair, but it was kept up in a bun.  Her eyes were brown and spread a feeling of fellowship and innocence.  She hardly looked like she should be in command of a starship.  Nevertheless, she continued her introduction, “I am the commander of the Zebulon Pike.  This is my First Officer, Commander Bryan Jensen.”  She indicated a short muscular man with short light brown hair and blue eyes.  Henderson shook both of their hands.
“Admiral,” started the other man in the group.  He is taller with medium length black hair.  He seems sterner than the other two, “Captain Kevin Smith, Commander of the Nathan Hale.  This is my first officer, Commander Molly Griffin.”  Commander Griffin was a highly attractive officer with medium brown, again could be long, hair, same eyes, and she radiated an atmosphere of energy.  Henderson firmly shook Smith’s hand, and then the enthusiastic hand of Commander Griffin.  Captain Smith fell into Tom’s idea of an intelligence officer, but Commander Griffin was by far not what he expected.
The four took their seats.  First officers next to their captains, ready for the Admiral to begin his briefing.
“Welcome to Sector 554.  You should have been doing your research, so I will spare you the details of the situation we’re in.  Since Starfleet is rather anxious to reestablish the law here, I will brief you quickly and allow you to get to work.”  The Admiral was interrupted as the doors to the situation room opened again, and two more individuals entered.
“Sorry we’re late, Admiral.  We just got in.  Captain Steven Matthews of the Wyatt Earp,” the medium height, medium built, brown-haired stud introduced himself, “this is my executive officer, Commander Jason Harp.”  Captain Matthews indicated a tall, gangly commander who stood slightly hunched over with an expression on his face as if someone had just hit him over the head with a brick.
“Have a seat, gentlemen.  We’re just getting started,” Henderson waited for them to be seated, “Just as well.  I’d much rather brief the fleet on the whole than drag out the whole affair.  As I was just saying, I trust that you know this sector’s history, so I will not go over that.  You know that we have to let the citizens of this sector know that the Federation law is back in town.  That will be the primary responsibility of the Wyatt Earp.”
“Admiral,” Commander Jensen spoke up, “Wouldn’t it make sense to put the Zebulon Pike in charge of law enforcement, as we are the more powerful vessel.”
“No, actually.  The Wyatt Earp is better geared toward law enforcement than the Pike is.  Besides, I have something in mind for the Pike.”  Henderson answered.
“Aye, sir.”  Jensen nodded his acknowledgement.
“So, the Earp is responsible for law enforcement.  Now, each colony has their own police force, so the Earp is to act as a supplement, not a replacement.  Also remember that we don’t have the resources to do much more.  We have three runabouts here at Starbase 334 that can be used to augment your efforts if it becomes necessary.  So, Captain Matthews, you will maintain a constant patrol between the three colonies in this sector.  Just duck in and check up on them.”
“Yes, sir.”  Matthews responded.
“Now, for the Hale,” Henderson paused, “I’ll come back to you.  Pike.  You know that the Cardassian border runs through this sector.  What I need the Pike to do is patrol that border.  This section has been unprotected for too long, and Starfleet fears that the Cardassians have gotten some ideas in their spoon-heads,” A chuckle rose among the commanders at Admiral Henderson’s crack, “Trade vessels are allowed to cross the border freely, but you need to make sure the Cardassian military stays on their side of the line.  That’s where we come to the Hale.  You have two jobs.  Keep an eye on things inside the sector.  We need you to be an extra set of eyes for the Earp.  Also, you will be patrolling the border upon occasion to make sure the Cardassians aren’t up to fowl play.  Nonetheless, I want you to be primarily worried about patrolling inside the sector.  Are there any questions?”  Henderson noticed Captain Erickson’s hand raise slightly, “Captain.”  He acknowledged her.
“Yes, Admiral.  How often do you want reports?”
“I am going to ask for ops normal checks every half-hour to an hour.  If I need any other reports in the interim, then I will contact you directly.”  He noticed she nodded in satisfaction, “If there’s nothing else, I’m going to dismiss you to go about your work.”

Stardate: 57878.9
Sector 564, near the Federation Border
Senit Nor Trading Station

Ri’ta Gul Rinkad sits behind his desk in his dark Cardassian office.  He is a stern military commander, hardened by many battles.  He reads a report that Glinn Yistin had just handed him.  Hatred burned in his bones.  He knew all his life that the Federation could not be trusted.  This report merely proved this to him.  The United Federation of Hypocrites, that’s what they were.  The image of a glorious empire of peace, goodwill and cooperation, is all just a façade to cover the corruption, greed, and imperial generals.  They wrote and spoke visions, and then plotted and exploited the weak for their own gain.
Rinkad throws the PADD down on the desk.  He had seen enough.  Yes, the Federation had helped Cardassia throw off the oppressive chains of the Dominion, and yes the Federation was helping them rebuild.  But the Federation would have been in ruins if the Cardassians hadn’t betrayed the Dominion.  He knew that Cardassia had to choose the lesser of two evils.  But that was four years ago.  Now it was time to eliminate all evil.
“Glinn Yistin,” his deep sinister voice addressed the officer across the desk from him, “You’re intelligence.”
“Covert Operations, sir.”  His slithery voice corrected his superior from across the dark room, his face hidden in the shadows.
“Even better,” the sinister voice of Rinkad sounded, the scheming intelligence obviously satisfied, “I want you to find a solution to this.”
“I have one ready, sir.  All I have to do is test it.”  Yistin’s monotonic, and smooth voice responded.
“I want to see it.”  Rinkad demanded of the man, looking in the direction he guessed Yistin was in.  Yistin approached the desk, the light perimeter from the overhead lamp slowly slipping up his torso and finally revealing his cold Cardassian face.  He dropped a pad of paper on the desk in front of Rinkad, “Paper?”  The Commander showed the smallest surprise, retrieving the pad.
“No computer records.  No intelligence leaks.  After the Dominion War, Federation intelligence has been putting their noses in everything.”  Yistin responded, looking apprehensive about being in the light.
“Very good, Glinn.  I like your style.”  Rinkad surveyed the paper with definite satisfaction glimmering out of his eyes, a twisted smile spreading over his face, “and I like the code you put it in.  It looks Federation.”
“That’s not a code, sir.  That’s an ancient Earth language, called German,” Yistin responded again, “Few Federation citizens know it.  No Cardassians do.”
“So no two-timing squeal box can read it and send it back to the Federation.  Looks like you covered your tracks,” Rinkad responded to Yistin, returning the pad.  Yistin retrieved it and retreated to the darkness, “Tell me, what is the plan?”
“Let me test it first, Ri’ta.  Then I will tell you everything.”  Yistin assured Rinkad.
“Do what you have to.”

Stardate: 57880.3
Sector 554, at the Cardassian Border
USS Zebulon Pike NCC 80225

Captain Erickson enters the bridge.  It wasn’t technically her shift for another two hours.  However, the second officer, Lieutenant Commander Sam Brady, had called her to the bridge briefly.  That was fine with her, being called up at five o’clock in the morning; she had gotten to bed early and was awake trying to find something productive to do.  Straightening her uniform, she proceeded towards Commander Brady, sitting in the center seat of the bridge.
“Commander Brady, what do you have?”  She asked, approaching him.
“Captain,” Sam stood and acknowledged the Captain, “We saw a Cardassian vessel cross the border.”
“A Cardassian vessel?”  She asked, emphasizing the indefinite article.
“Well, not just one.  There have been fifteen incursions over the past hour.  All of them are harmless Hideki-class scouts.  The Pike could easily take on all fifteen of them.”  He explained.
“But fifteen incursions in one hour.”  She finished his sentence.
“Yes ma’am.  I thought it was a bit odd.”  Brady looked into the face of his commanding officer as she thought about the matter.  She sat down in the Command seat and brought her hand to her chin, staring blankly ahead of her.
“Did you report this to Admiral Henderson?”  She broke her trance and looked at Brady as he took a seat to her left.
“Yes, ma’am.  We sent it with the status report seven minutes ago.”  She returned her gaze to the point ahead of her.
“Any answer?”  This time she didn’t break her trance.
“No, ma’am.  Admiral Henderson is probably just barely finding out.”  He looked ahead at the stars.  Fifteen times he had seen the Hideki-class vessel grace that screen.  It was really quite a beautiful vessel.  But it signified a race the Federation has never been able to trust.
“Captain, there’s another one coming across the border.  Bearing 151 mark 339.”  The ensign at the tactical station behind Captain Erickson cried out over the sound of an alarm.
“Helm, set an intercept course for that vessel.  Maximum safe speed.  We need to let them know which side of the border is theirs.  Yellow alert!  Raise shields and charge phasers.”  She stared determinedly at the screen as the sound of the warp engines activated and the stars stretched past for the briefest of moments.  They stayed at warp for only a second or two.  The stars returned to normal and they watched their approach towards the Hideki scout from above it’s position.
“Target them!”  Rachel ordered, staring daggers at the intruding ship.
“Sir, they’re headed back to Cardassian space,” The tactical operator called out as the ship spun around and warped off the screen, “They’re really moving, ma’am.”
“Of course they are.  A battleship heads for a glorified shuttle that you happen to be in with the guns ready to fire, you’d get back in your limits rather quickly,” Erickson responded, almost laughing at fast the Hideki packed out, “Maybe that’ll put an end to the incursions for a while.  If you need me, I’ll be in my ready room.”  She stood and walked off the bridge.

Starbase 334

“Fifteen incursions?”  Admiral Henderson had just arrived on the bridge after being summoned by the Commander Ryan Smith and was now looking over a report the Communications officer had handed off to him.
“Yes sir.”  Commander Smith answered standing in front of the Admiral right in front of the Admiralty Chair.
“Do you get the nasty feeling that the Cardassians are up to something?”  He asked, handing the PADD back to the Executive Officer.
“Yes sir.  Either that, or the Cardassians are hiring horrible navigators.”  The Commander cracked as he accepted the PADD.
“Well, you’d think that after two or three incursions the commander would relieve the navigator of duty.”  Admiral Herschell responded.
“You’d think so.”  Tom walked to the back of the bridge and stood behind the CIP, staring at the stars on the viewscreen, “Where is the Nathan Hale?”
“It put in towards the end of Beta shift, Admiral.”  Ryan answered, standing in front of the CIP facing the Admiral.
“Get me Captain Smith,” Henderson pauses for a moment, “Captain Smith.  Any relation?”  He asked Ryan, upon connecting the names.
“He’s my older brother, sir.”  Ryan responded, in a professional voice as always.
“I see,” Henderson frowns slightly in a trance as he makes small nods, “Well, get him up here.  I think we’re going to need Starfleet Intelligence.”

Stardate: 57880.4
Admiral’s Ready Room

“Fifteen incursions, sir?”  Captain Smith blurted out in a tone of surprise, with a wide-eyed facial expression to match.
“Yes, Captain.  Fifteen incursions in one hour,” Henderson sat behind his highly polished desk, hands clasped in front of him and laid neatly on the mirror-like surface, “What would an experienced intelligence man like you say to that?”  Henderson implored the Captain looking steadfastly for an answer.
“I would say that the Cardassians are up to something.”  Smith read a PADD with the Zebulon Pike’s report on it.
“Oh, good.  Now that an expert has said that I feel much better saying it myself,” Henderson drew a look from Smith by his sarcasm, “I know the Cardassians are up to something.  But what?”
“Well, the Captain could have stayed up late at a bachelor party and is now CUI.”  Kevin proposed with a look of innocence on his face.
“CUI?”  The Admiral knew nothing good could come from this question, yet he was still annoyingly curious.
“Commanding Under the Influence, sir.”  He responded, a grin cracking across his face, his shoulders shaking under the silent chuckles of his own joke.
“My kingdom for an officer who will give me a straight answer!”  Thomas rolled his eyes and leaned back in his seat.
“I’m Starfleet Intelligence, sir.  I don’t give anybody a straight answer.”  The Captain expressed the irony of his foolish jokes.
“I’ve noticed.”  Admiral Henderson’s dry voice and dark expression flew from his slouched body in the seat.
“Listen, Admiral.  Honestly, I can’t begin to tell you without more information.  Best guess: the Cardassians are preparing for an invasion.”  The first serious words out of Captain Smith’s mouth.
“Invasion?”  Henderson leaned forward.  Now that Smith was done with his jokes, the Admiral was interested.
“Not an immediate invasion.  We don’t trust the Cardassians, sir.  Honestly, they have a harder time trusting us.  They’re engaged in military exercises.  Running the border, trying to be undetected.  Now that we have a Starship there, it makes it all that more exciting.  They may feel that someday they may need to perform a preemptive strike to defend themselves.”  He rationalized.
“Why would they do that on the Federation border, now?”
“Probably because they know the Federation is not going to declare war over a few incursions that didn’t amount to anything.  They don’t trust us, but they know we’re docile.”  Kevin replied truthfully.
“Yeah,” Tom leaned back, again exasperated, “It’s hard being the teeth of an animal that refuses to fight.”
They sat for a moment, the Admiral rotating his chair towards the window in the office, such that he could see the stars.  Contemplating what he had just heard for a few seconds he turned back around.
“Captain, what kind of ‘more information’ do you need?”

Stardate: 57880.6
SS Cutty Sark

Captain Ryan Harrin stood on the bridge of his transport vessel, examining the viewscreen ahead of him.  The Cutty Sark was by far not the kind of ship he commanded when he was in Starfleet.  Then again, the Cutty Sark wouldn’t have been able to handle some of the things Captain Harrin put the Iowa through during the Dominion War.  They were two vessels of two breeds.  The Iowa’s job was to fight other vessels.  The Cutty Sark’s job was to haul freight through relatively docile territory.  It had one low powered phaser bank intended to clear annoying space debris.
Captain Harrin reviewed his flight plan.  It would take him over the Federation/Cardassian border and straight to Senit Nor.  There he would drop off his cargo of Saurian Brandy and pick up some h’sencar.  H’sencar was some of the finest fabric in the Alpha Quadrant, and it was manufactured in Cardassian space.  H’sencar was some of the most commodious material in the Federation, and merchant captains like Harrin had been trading whatever the Federation had to offer for this stuff for four years straight.  There was a huge demand for it, and Harrin had every intention of continuing trade for h’sencar for however long it was profitable.  He looked across the bridge of his vessel to see one of his crewmembers talking with a Starfleet security officer.  The crewmember pointed to him and the security officer nodded.  The crewman left the bridge while the officer proceeded over to Harrin.  Harrin faced the man as he approached.
“Captain Harrin?”  The officer, his insignia indicated he was a lieutenant, asked the Captain.
“Yes, lieutenant, what can I do for you?”  Harrin couldn’t figure out why security would be coming for him.  As far as he knew, he didn’t break any laws.
“Captian, Admiral Henderson would like to have a word with you.”  The officer spoke in a professional, yet easy going voice.
“Who is Admiral Henderson?”  Harrin recognized that name, but wasn’t sure about it.
“He’s the Sector commander, sir.”
“I didn’t know we had a Sector Commander.”  Henderson still rang a bell, but on a different front.
“We didn’t until yesterday.  He would still like to have a word with you.”
“Did he say why?”  Harrin began to be concerned.  A green-behind-the-ears sector commander wanting to talk to a merchant was never a good sign.
“No, sir.  He just said it was urgent.”  The Lietuenant replied.  Having been in Starfleet for most of his life, Ryan knew that when an Admiral said something was urgent, it was urgent.  Whether or not the Admiral was right, which he rarely was.
“Lead the way, Lieutenant.”  The Lieutenant led Harrin out of the ship through the docking arm and through the bowls of the station.  They walked into a turbolift and it carried them up to a hallway.  Upon the turbolift opening, two doors were visible across the hall.  The Lieutenant led Harrin through the ones on their left.  This led them into a room that Harrin immediately recognized as a situation room.  He had been in one too many of these during the Dominion War.  Seated at the presenter’s station was a face he hadn’t seen for a long time.
“Tom!”  Suddenly he remembered where he had heard the name “Henderson.”
“Good morning, Randy.”  The Rear Admiral greeted Harrin.  They shook hands enthusiastically.
“Captain Thomas Henderson of the USS Thunderchild.  Long time no see!  So they made you the Admiral of this sector.”  Harrin’s apprehension had gone away at the meeting of an old friend.
“The war vet captains who stuck around were all put on the admiralty promotion list.  My name finally came up.  If you had stuck around, you would have made it to admiral as well.”  Henderson was glad to finally meet up with his old friend.
“Oh no, Tom.  Starfleet was way too much adventure for me.  I needed something a little more calm,” They laughed.  Both of them had been on very exciting missions, some of them together, “So what is this I hear about you wanting to talk to me?”
“I need you to do me a favor, Ryan.  I need to put one of my officers on the other side of the border.”
“And you want to stow them on my ship.  I don’t know, Tom.”  Ryan knew exactly what Tom was getting at.
“Now hear me out, Ryan.  This is the officer I want to put on the other side of the border,” the Admiral indicated a woman Ryan didn’t notice before, “This is Commander Molly Griffin from SI.”  Griffin was dressed in the same uniform Harrin used on the Cutty Sark.  I want her to be your sensors officer, and get stranded at Senit Nor.  I’ll worry about getting her out, you just get her there.”
“I already have a sensors officer, Dayton Garret.”  Ryan protested further.
“I don’t know, but I think he’s a suspect in an assault case in one of the bars.  What do you think, Commander?”  Henderson turned to Griffin.
“You know what, sir, I think you’re right.”  She responded in mock agreement.
“I’m sorry Captain Harrin, but I think I’ll have to detain Mister, was it Garret?”  Henderson turned to Ryan in the same mock tone of voice.
“Oh come on, Tom!  That’s a load of bull and you know it!  You can’t convince anyone that Dayton would do something like that!”  Ryan was somewhat outraged.
“Don’t worry, sir, our security staff on Starbase 334 is a crack team.  They’ll have your man cleared by the end of the day.”  Griffin interjected reassuringly.
“I should’ve known better than to mess with SI.  Okay, I’ll do it.  But I want my man back.”  Ryan pointed his finger at the Admiral, emphasizing his last point.
“You got it, Ryan.  But you’ll have to stay mum about the whole affair.  You need to act like Molly is your replacement for this mission.  Even the guy we’re going to take out of the game.”  Henderson explained.
“You don’t have to read me the classified riot act, Tom.  I still remember my Starfleet days,” Ryan remembered one particular intelligence dodge he had to come up with that involved his wife’s underwear.  He grinned, “Tom, remember the Sol-Dominion Repulsion?”
“How could I forget?”  Tom asked, after turning away from the security officer that had escorted Harrin up here.  The officer left the room, “I’m still trying to get the hair back on my legs.”  Griffin did a take of wide-eyed curiosity.
“What?”  She asked, thinking Henderson had encountered some kind of chemical that had burned the hair off his legs.
“That’s classified, Commander.”  Henderson responded.
“I’m intelligence, sir, I’m probably cleared.”  She pressed further.
“Commander,” Henderson placed his hand on her shoulder in a fatherly way and put on a stern and frank demeanor, “You won’t be cleared until the day I die.”  She looked at him, confused.  His statement was quite discombobulating.
“Sir?  Under…”  Molly really wanted to know when Starfleet Intelligence started classifying data like that, and began asking, but Henderson had returned to his normal bearing and interrupted her.
“Captain Harrin, go ahead and return to your vessel.  I have already sent security to set these events in motion.  Commander Griffin, I want you to go down to Tradewinds.  Captain Harrin will come in there ‘looking for a temp.’”  Henderson gave instructions to the two with him.  They both immediately left the room.  Tom stood in the middle of the empty room staring at one of the screens near the ceiling.  It showed a map of the sector, and the ship movements therein.  He stared at it, thinking about what he just set into motion.
“Let’s hope this works.”

Stardate: 57880.8
SS Cutty Sark

Tyson Paine just closed the last crate.  He had been standing in the cargo bay inspecting every crate and inventorying everything here.  It was actually less inventorying and more trying to figure out whether or not someone was smuggling an item aboard, or something of that sort, that would cause the Cutty Sark to be in danger or to get in trouble with Federation law.  That was the job of the Chief of Security.  He had been a security officer during the Dominion War; in fact he was Captain Harrin’s Chief of Security on the Iowa. That’s how they knew each other, and that’s how Tyson ended up on this ship.
The Payload Specialist was in charge of inventories.  However, due to some of the interesting things they have found while doing inventories, the captain felt it was best for the Chief of Security to do this.  Paine usually liked to do the inventories as the crates are coming on to the ship, that way it doesn’t distract him from his duties.  But he had a run-in with Station Security.  They were telling him that Dayton Garret was a suspect in an assault.  He couldn’t believe anyone would think of Dayton that way.  He was one of the nicest, most personable individuals.  There was no possible way he could have assaulted anyone.
A few minutes later, he entered the bridge of the Cutty Sark.  This room wasn’t much.  Just three stations in front, helm, sensors and communications.  The Captain’s chair was in the middle with three stations behind it, Payload Specialist, Security, and engineer.  The bridge wasn’t always like this, the stations used to be spread around the walls and the Captain was at the helm station.  Paine suspected that Harrin had rearranged the bridge to be more like a Starfleet bridge.  The adage was true, a Starfleet captain never retires.  He proceeded to his station and handed off a PADD to the Payload Specialist.
“Thanks, Tyson,” John Feriman accepted the PADD, glanced at it, and then set it down.  Then he leaned towards Paine and whispered, “Hey, Tyson, what do you think about our new sensors operator?”  Feriman asked, indicating Molly Griffin.
“I don’t think I can trust her, John.  There’s just something about her that’s not right,” He stared at her back, her brown flowing hair falling around her shoulders as she worked her station, “I mean, don’t you think it’s a bit odd that security hauls off Dayton, and then the Captain goes into the Starbase bar and just happens to find a perfect replacement?”
“Yeah, how do you suppose she got onto Starbase 334?”  Feriman asked him.
“I don’t know.  But, speaking as a retired Starfleet officer, it’s kind of odd for someone who has no connection with either Starfleet or a vessel that trades at that station to be on that station.”  He answered.
“Captain, we are entering Cardassian space.  Approximately one hour until we arrive at Senit Nor.”  Ms. Griffin spoke up, turning around to face Ryan.  Harrin acknowledged her, and she turned back, making the briefest of eye contact with Tyson.  Tyson tried to read her eyes, her expression.  But it was too brief, and she was too emotionless.
“She’s apprehensive.”  Tyson commented.
“Heard it in her voice?”  John asked.
“No.  She’s tapping on her console.”  John looked over and saw her fingers doing an impressive roll on the edge of the console.
“She looked at you,” Tyson moved his head side-to-side, affirming John’s observation, “Did you see any apprehension?”
“No, she’s a blank slate,” The hand Molly had been using to tap on the console clenched into a fist and returned to the console.  She showed no further signs of emotion.  She actually looked quite bored, “The only people I have seen like that are Starfleet Officers.  I mean, listen to how she reported our location.  That’s not the way most civilians would do it.”  Tyson rationalized, burning his gaze into her back.
“I think you’re getting paranoid,” John dismissed him, “a civilian who wants to impress a new boss would do that.”
“No, hear me out,” Tyson had just figured something, as he waved his finger at John, “You see, she was in a bar on the station.  I’m a civilian, but I do things the Starfleet way because I used to be a Starfleet officer.  She’s a civilian, but she does things the Starfleet way because she was a Starfleet officer.  My guess is that she did something that got her dismissed from Starfleet, and she was in the bar to drown her sorrows around the time the Captain came in.”
“Yep, you’re paranoid,” John replied calmly, retrieving the PADD Tyson handed him earlier, “I’ve been thinking about asking her out myself.  She’s hot.”  Tyson shot him a dark look, snorted, and went back to his work.
As per Ms. Griffin’s predictions, the Cutty Sark pulled into Senit Nor within the hour.  The Helm had brought them into the old Cardassain mining station.  This particular design was the one that made Deep Space Nine obsolete to the Cardassians.  The Cutty Sark docked with no trouble.  Captain Harrin assigned Paine and Griffin to retrieve the new supplies.  His excuse was that he wanted Paine to inventory the h’sencar before it got onto the ship.  The Payload Specialist was going to go close the deal, and the Engineer, Helm, and the Captain were going to go check out a relay to one of the thrusters.  The only crewmembers left were Griffin and the Communications crewman.  The Comm person had to stay behind in case they got any messages from anyone.  So Griffin was sent with Paine to help bring the crates in.  They all split off to do their various duties.  John, Molly, and Tyson arrived at the end of the docking arm to be met by two Cardassian officials.
“That is Gil Samgar.  I do most of my dealings with him.”
“Don’t you men Glen Samgar?”  Tyson read the insignia on his uniform.
“Maybe he got promoted.”  Molly interjected.
“That’s a demotion.”  Tyson eyed Molly suspiciously, if she was a Starfleet officer, then why would she be so incompetent at the Cardassian rank system?  “You say you’ve never seen the other guy?”  Tyson asked as the Glen pointed them out to the other man with him, and they started coming over.
“No.”  John responded, preparing to meet them.
“He’s a Ri’ta Gul.  That’s about equivalent to Rear Admiral Lower Half.”  Tyson whispered incredulously.  Taking a quick glance at Molly.  Her eyes were doing a dart around the room, taking everything in.
“That’s why we bring you along on these,” John barely had enough time to whisper to Tyson before the Ri’ta Gul and Glen Samgar were in range, “Greetings, Glen.”
“Greetings Mr. Feriman,” Glen Samgar responded, “This, Gul, is John Feriman, the Cutty Sark has done all of their dealings through him.  This man is Tyson Paine, he is the security official of the Cutty Sark.  I don’t know who this woman is.”
“Molly Griffin.  I’m temping as sensors.”  She responded, extending her hand.
“Ms. Griffin, where were you assigned before coming aboard the Cutty Sark?”  The Ri’ta Gul moved in towards Molly, getting awfully close.  His cold face staring straight down into her eyes.
“I am the First Mate on a merchant vessel undergoing maintenance,” She boldly, almost defiantly, stared straight back into his eyes.  Neither of them blink, “The Starbase 334 engineers were hired, and I was left behind to coordinate their efforts.”
“So you came from Starbase 334?”  His gaze bore straight into her, searching her eyes.  She did not show any sign of emotion, her demeanor was just as cold and empty as his.
“To here, yes.  I don’t usually spend time there.”  There was a silence as their stares were locked at each other, waiting for the other to flinch, daring the other to blink.
“Gul, I do not believe we’ve met.”  Paine intervened, sensing the hostility between the two, extending his hand.
“Ri’ta Gul Rinkad.  Superior officer of this sector.”  He finally broke his gaze away from Griffin, and turned it to Paine.  But he didn’t take his hand.
“It’s a pleasure, Gul.  Mister Feriman here will handle the business dealings.  Miss Griffin and I will go down and get the goods.”  Tyson took a step forward, to be stopped by Rinkad’s extended hand.
“You will be escorted by Glinn Yistin,” Rinkad pointed to another Cardassian, even creepier than Rinkad.  Nobody had noticed him as of yet, but he carried a book under one arm, “Recent pirate activity in this sector.  We need to keep an eye on the people we let into our cargo bays.”  He spoke coldly, then turned around and left the area.  Yistin motioned Griffin and Paine towards him.
Paine hated this situation, something was definitely not right.  The last time he had that instinct, he ended up in an intense firefight.  Fastening on the bearing he had developed as a Starfleet Security Officer, he marched forward, Griffin perfectly at his side.  This was the first time he felt a sense of trust in her.  She had survived a mental beating by a Cardassian flag officer, and she had survived well.  If they got into a tiff, he knew he could rely on her nerves.
“You did well against that Ri’ta Gul back there.  Most people would have broken down.”  Tyson whispered to her just before they got within to Yistin’s hearing.
“Thanks,” she smiled openly, “I had a stern father.”  They both headed straight for Yistin.
“Come with me.”  He responded coldly.  Then turned and marched down the corridor.  After glancing at each other, Griffin and Paine followed.  Griffin couldn’t help but to notice the book Yistin was carrying.  It had a symbol on the front that made a chill run up her spine.  The Obsidian Order.  She knew she had to get that book away from him somehow.  Her gut told her that whatever it was she was looking for, that was it.
After wandering through the station, travelling through a few turbolifts.  They arrived in the musty and dark cargo bay.
“How many crates?”  He asked, with definite distaste in his work.
“I, don’t know.  Let me go check.”  Paine turned and began to leave the cargo bay.  Just before he left the room, he turned around and looked at Molly.  Should I leave her with him?  I guess she’s competent, she can handle him.  He left.
Yistin was thoroughly frustrated.  He slammed his book down on top of one of the crates, Molly eyed the book, trying to figure out something to do.  Getting an idea, she loosened the collar on her shirt, and rolled up her sleeves.  Then she fluffed her hair, then threw her head back.  Glancing up, she saw that Yistin was watching her, almost greedily.  She smiled at him, then walked across the cargo bay and retrieved an antigrav cart.  She pushed it to the crates, slinking across the room.  She stopped the cart right next to the pile of crates.  Then turning to give Yistin a perfect profile view of her, she stretched her arms, arching her back.  Then she asked him, in a half-tired voice.
“Is this h’sencar?”  She pointed at a crate on the pile.
“Everything here, ma’am.”  She could see in his eyes that he was weakening to her strategy.  He pointed at all of the piles of crates.  She nodded, smiled at him again and gave him a half-glance.  Then she reached over to pick up one off a pile.  Suddenly she saw a hand next to her.  She looked quickly at it’s owner, seeing Yistin with a twisted smile on his face.  All his smile did was make him look uglier, if that could be possible.
“Please, ma’am, allow me,”  He indicated that he wanted to pick up the crate for her.  She allowed a wide grin to cross her face.  She stepped back while he lifted the crate and placed it on the cart.  Then he opened the box, and removed a bolt of the fabric, “This is the finest fabric in the Alpha Quadrant.”
Why is he bragging about cloth?  She thought, while she extended her hand and ran it over the fabric, “It is quite…soft.”  She said in her half-tired, drawling voice.  On the last word she looked into his eyes.  He struck her as quite unattractive.  No wonder why he took the bait, no woman has ever acted like this around him.  He leaned forward, his face getting closer to hers.  Who said death is the ultimate sacrifice!
Their lips touched.  Griffin did her best to act like she was enjoying this moment.  The bolt of cloth dropped, and her hands began to feel around his body.  He wrapped his arms around her, and their kiss became more passionate.  Hey!  This isn’t even the first date!
“What is going on here!”  Tyson had returned, with John at his shoulder.  In a split-second, Molly immediately broke the embrace, and swung around flail armed, catching the book and sending it flying into the open crate sitting on the antigrav cart.  Before anyone had a chance to see the book had changed his location, she ran over and slammed the crate shut.
“Thank you, Glinn.  It looks like everything is here.”  She straightened her uniform, closing up the neck of it.  She stood straight, trying to make it look like she was embarrassed Tyson came in.  In reality, she was relieved.  Tyson marched over to him, and leaned in to her.  Speaking in a stern whisper.
“What are you thinking?  Recreating with a Cardassian Officer while you’re supposed to be doing a job?”  She gave him a dumb look.
“How many crates?”  Yistin was back to himself, except he was now standing next to Molly, seeming to take a defensive posture on her behalf.
“Twenty.”  Paine’s voice lowered the temperature a couple degrees Celsius.
“They’re right here.”  Yistin responded aggressively, pointing at the pile.  Then he headed to the door of the bay.  He turned around suddenly, eyeing the spot where he left his book.  He looked concerned.  Looking at Molly, he appeared to almost be ready to say something.  Then he eyed John and Tyson, then proceeded out of the room.  Tyson turned to her.
“That was brilliant, Miss Griffin!”  He was almost to the point of laughter.
“It was?”  His reaction somewhat took Molly off guard.
“Yeah, soften the guy up before he has a chance to attack you!  Oh, the advantages of being a woman.”  He was shaking his head, smiling endlessly at what just happened.
“What do you say we get these crates on the ship and get out of here before that Ri’ta Gul finds something to keep us here?”  John asked Tyson.
“Yeah, Miss Griffin, I’m going to assume you already inspected this crate.”  He indicated the one on the cart, the one with that intelligence she had just “gathered.”
“Yeah, it has nothing but cloth in it.”  She responded.  Over the next half an hour, they opened nineteen more crates and loaded them on the cart.  Then they pushed it down to the Cutty Sark.

Stardate: 57881.3
Starbase 334 Situation Room

“Listen sharp, guys.  The Cardassians are missing something they think is aboard the Cutty Sark,” Admiral Henderson barged into the room from the Bridge.  In there was the remainder of the crew of the Nathan Hale, “They are very interested in getting this thing back.  They are telling us to make sure no one goes into the cargo bay of the Cutty Sark until they have a chance to search it.”
“The work of Commander Griffin.”  Captain Smith immediately concluded.  The five officers were grouped around the table in the middle of the room.  Captain Smith was standing in the middle of his crew, crowded on one end.  Admiral Henderson leaned his hands on the other.
“That’s what I’m guessing.  I don’t know her that well, though.”  He looked at Smith, to get his opinion.
“I’ve worked with Molly for three years, sir.  She’s good.”  He responded.
“That’s all I need to know.  So here’s what’s going to happen,” Henderson straightened up and started walking around the room.  The crew of the Nathan Hale cast their gaze around to watch him, “I am going to take security on to the bridge of the Cutty Sark and make a big deal.  You gentlemen are going to take a gander at the Cargo bay.  If you find anything that looks like the Cardassians would be making a big deal over, take it.”
“Admiral, it would be prudent if this document is not the only item we retrieve from the Cutty Sark.”  Lieutenant Sivinh, the Vulcan tactical officer of the Nathan Hale spoke up.
“What do you mean, Lieutenant?”  The Admiral paused near the tables facing the screen, behind the crew of the Nathan Hale who had turned to face him.
“I mean, sir.  If we remove a few bolts of h’sencar from the cargo bay, then we would have the perfect cover for when the Cardassians find out someone has been in the cargo bay before them.”  Sivinh explained placidly.
“I agree,” Henderson resumed his pace around the room, “The Cutty Sark should be here in five minutes.  The Cardassians are sending a Keldon-class vessel.”
“Keldon-class!”  Ensign Rachel Goeres, the Conn officer, spoke out, “Isn’t that a bit much?”
“Of course, not Ensign.  It is perfectly logical to send a large warship to recover a valuable document.”  Sivinh responded.
“Certainly, we’d send the Enterprise to find something if we lost it.”  Lieutenant Junior Grade Robert Samp responded.
“I’d take the Nathan Hale over the Enterprise on any intelligence mission.”  Captain Smith spoke proudly.
“Captain, at the moment anyone would take anything over the Enterprise on any kind of a mission.  Half of her saucer section went missing a week ago, if you don’t recall,” Henderson responded, talking about the events in Romulan space last week that involved the Enterprise and the Scimitar, “Anyhow, we don’t need to worry about the Cardassian warship.  I’m going to have the Zebulon Pike hound her every move.  If they do anything stupid, the Pike will whomp on them.”  Admiral Henderson’s combadge keyed in, and Captain James called over.
“Admiral, the Cutty Sark has just put into port.”
“Understood, Captain.  Have security meet me there,” he closed the line, “Now we get to work.”

SS Cutty Sark

“Captain, Starbase 334 is telling us that we are to stay at our stations and not let anyone in the cargo bay until further notice.”  The communications officer reported to Captain Harrin.
“Really?  I wonder why?”  Harrin mused just moments before Henderson barged into the room.
“Captain Harrin, what in the name of Olympus Mons were you thinking?”  Henderson and two security officers cruised on to the bridge, Henderson’s voice raised.  He startled everyone on the bridge, “You leave gathering intelligence up to Starfleet Intelligence.  You, as a civilian, are to never take the law into your own hands!”
“What are you talking about, Admiral?”  Harrin asked, insulted.
“I just got off the line with Ri’ta Gul Rinkad.  He’s my counterpart on the other side of the border.  He says that the Cutty Sark may be carrying documents of a ‘highly sensitive nature’ and are ‘crucial to the survival of the Union.’  Perhaps you can tell me what the hell he’s talking about!”  Henderson advanced on Harrin, who got on his feet.
“I don’t know what he’s talking about!  And I would appreciate it if you didn’t use fowl language on my bridge!”  Harrin advanced on Henderson, hoping to re-establish his dominance.
“You haven’t seen fowl language yet, Captain,” Henderson spat the last word out as if it had a bad taste in his mouth, “Who did you send down to the cargo hold of Senit Nor?”
“Griffin and Paine, Admiral.”  Harrin gave his courtesy an equal sense of distaste.
“Griffin!  Paine!  Get your asses over here!”  Henderson shouted.  They dared not to disobey him, standing immediately and running to his position.  They both had to suppress the urge so salute, Tyson because he was retired, Molly because she wasn’t supposed to be an officer.
“Admiral Henderson…”  Harrin was about to protest Henderson’s abuse of his officers, and use of abusive language.
“Captain, take your opinions some place where someone will care.  Flushing them down the head comes to mind,” Henderson shouted between the two crewmen standing in front of him, “And, by the way, I am taking these two for questioning.  Really, Captain, you need to start controlling your crew.  Three of your ranks have had to come chat with my security.  Boys, take them to the Situation Room.”  Henderson addressed the security detachment with him.  They marched off the bridge.

Starbase 334 Situation Room

“Okay, have a seat,” Henderson had led Griffin and Paine to the tables by the screen.  The lights in this room had been dimmed to about a fourth of what they were supposed to be.  It was very difficult to see anyone beyond the Admiral, who seemed to be perfectly illuminated, in fact, their part of the room seemed perfectly illuminated, “Mister Paine, I’ll have you know that you’re not in trouble.  Miss Griffin has a history of medaling in affairs that do not concern her.  I just want to know what happened out there.”
Paine looked shocked.  He took a look at Molly, who had her chin high.  She looked proud that she had just broken a law, “Well, sir, nothing really happened.  I left for a moment to find out how many crates…”
“How long is a moment?”  Admiral Henderson cut off Tyson.
“Ten, maybe twenty mintues.”  He answered, looking at Molly, completely unsure about the time he was gone.
“That’s more than a moment, Paine.”  Henderson sternly corrected.
“Okay, I was gone for several moments, Admiral.  What difference does it make?”  Tyson could not believe someone of the caliber of Griffin could be accused of breaking a law, and he wanted to defend her.
“It’s a difference in the fact that it was long enough for her to fly the coup with Cardassian Military secrets!”  Henderson raised his voice, then calming down he asked, “What was she doing when you got back?”
Again, Tyson looked unsure.  He took another glance at Molly, “Making out with a Cardassian Officer.”
Henderson couldn’t believe he heard that.  He looked at her, dumbfounded.  His bearing was completely destroyed out of shock, “Making out with a Cardassian Military Officer?”  He saw her nod her head, matter-of-factly.  Tom blinked.  He then dropped his head slightly, still looking at Molly, and gave her a look that asked “Was that really necessary?”
“I thought he was quite, attractive.”  She responded, thinking I am so lying through my Spoon-head saliva painted-teeth.  Tom rolled his eyes.
“Sir, the Officer was an intimidating individual.  Miss Griffin had to act preemptively to protect herself.”  Tyson was determined to defend her.
“Mister Paine, preemptive is a term we use for soldiers, not sluts,” the Admiral responded, nearly exasperated, “I have heard enough out of you.  Return to your vessel.”
“But, sir!”  He just knew in his bones that Griffin was going to be punished for a crime he did not believe she did.
“Dismissed, Tyson.  You do still remember what that means, right?”  He glared at him, forcing him to stand down.  The Admiral then turned his attention to the security guards, “Gentlemen, please go release mister Garret from the brig.  Now that we have the real attacker in our custody, I believe we can release the Cutty Sark’s sensors operator to them.”  After making this comment, Tyson and the security detachment left.  The lights went to full, and Captain Smith and his crew emerged from the far side of the room, where they were hidden by darkness.  Captain Smith had a book under one arm.
“Admiral, would you happen to have any mouthwash?”  Commander Griffin asked him calmly.
“No, why?”  He replied.
“That Cardassian tongued me!”  She replied in disgust.  Everyone broke out into laughter, “Yeah, sure, laugh.  I should receive a medal for what I did over there.  Allowing myself to fall to that creep in the name of intelligence!”
“A medal?”  Henderson asked between laughs, “For what?  Going above and below the call of duty?”
“Seriously, Commander, how did you get this?”  Captain Smith spoke up, placing the book on the table.  He left the Obsidian Order’s emblem show to everyone in the room.
“I got the guy who had it in a…disadvantaged situation.  Then I swiped the book and dropped it in a crate of h’sencar.”  She explained.
“Have you looked it over, Captain.”  Henderson asked?
“Yes, sir.  The Computer was able to translate it easily.  Apparently the Cardassians put it in German instead of encrypting it.  That kind of makes sense, since only the massive libraries of a Federation Starbase would be able to translate that data.  The Cardassians certainly wouldn’t have a translation capability, as most of the sophants in the Alpha Quadrant.”  Smith explained, “But I haven’t read the translation.”  Captain James poked her head into the room.
“Sorry to interrupt, Captain, but the Ikidar, you know, that Keldon we’ve been expecting.  Yeah, it’s here.”  She stood by the door and waited for an answer.
“See what you can do to delay their docking for the next five minutes,” She nodded and returned to the bridge, “Captain Smith now would be a good time to get out of here.”
“Aye, sir,” Smith retrieved the book, and his entire crew left the room quickly, almost running, “Oh, Commander Griffin, we have your uniform in the Nathan Hale.  You can change once we get out of here.”  He told her just before the exited the door.
“Thank you sir, I’ve been wanting to get out of…”  Henderson didn’t hear her finish her sentence, the doors closed between them and him.  He silently counted out five sets of sixty.  It probably wasn’t anywhere near five minutes, because he spent a couple of seconds at each number.  But that didn’t bother him, the Nathan Hale needed all the time they could get.  Hoping for the best, he straightened his uniform and headed straight onto the bridge.
He was greeted by the image of Captain James trying to talk down a Cardassian official.
“I’m sorry, sir, but I need the Admiral’s permission before docking any foreign vessel.”  Captain James was talking to what looked like a very infuriated Cardassian Gul.
“What, Captain, is keeping the good Admiral?”  You could tell “Good Admiral” was almost sarcastic.
“I don’t know what’s keeping him, sir, that’s above my pay grade!”  She responded to the hostile Gul.
“What’s going on here.”  Admiral Henderson spoke up, approaching the center of the bridge.
“Ah, here he is now, Gul,” James indicated the Admiral, and whispered to him, “Gul Ekat of the Ikidar, Admiral.  Good luck.”
“Thank you, Captain, you’ve done a great service to your nation,” he whispered back to her, “Gul Ekat, greetings.  What can I do for you.”
“Admiral Henderson, I have a Glinn Yistin here from the Cardassian Military.  He has been asked by Ri’ta Gul Rinkad to investigate the Cutty Sark. Now, I demand that the Federation stop delaying and you get this ship docked now!”  The Gul shouted.
“I see, well this shouldn’t have taken so long, Gul.  If you had just had my adjutant send me a message, we could have avoided this whole mess.”  Henderson spoke to the Gul cheerfully.
“Admiral, you’re adjutant is in the brig.”  James stood off to the side, she seemed confused.
“Oh, really?”  He looked at her, looking through narrow eyes, racking his senile brain.  He leaned in towards her, “When did that happen?”
“Admiral!”  Gul Ekat protested.
“Oh, right,” Henderson straightened back up, restoring his bearing, “Operations, dock him.”
“Aye, sir.”  The Chief of Ops responded.
“Oh, and Admiral, Glinn Yistin wants a Molly Griffin to meet him at the docking port of the Cutty Sark.”  The Gul continued.
“Right, security.”  Henderson responded.
“Sir, Griffin is also in the brig.”  James replied again.
“Well, then get her out!”  Henderson shouted.
“But, sir,” Lieutenant Commander Eric Rheb spoke up from the Chief Security station, “Griffin is being interrogated for hacking.  It would be a bad idea to stop that, it would relieve the pressure.”
“I understand, Admiral.”  Ekat smiled.
“You do?”  Henderson was caught of guard.
“I am a Cardassian, Admiral.  I understand that pressure is key to interrogation.”  His crooked grin spread even further, “I hope we meet again, Admiral.  I like your style.”  The line closed.  Everyone on the bridge let out their breath.
“That was close,” Henderson turned to James, “My aide is in the brig?”
“I figured it would be best if we had an excuse for when the Cardassians found out that you don’t have an adjutant.”  James responded.
“I don’t have an adjutant?”  Henderson was shocked.
“No, sir.”  James grinned, recognizing the act.
“How did I miss that?”  He began to leave the bridge, “How did I miss that?  I could have sworn I had an adjutant!”  He slipped through the door to the hallway.

SS Cutty Sark Docking Arm

Henderson arrived at the port the Cutty Sark was moored at.  There, two security officers, and three Cardassians stood, waiting for the Admiral.  One was a Glinn, another was a Ja’rel, and the third was a Chi.  One officer and an enlisted posse.  The Cardassians don’t do anything different from us.
“You must be Glinn Yistin, I am Admiral Henderson, Sector Commander.”  Henderson extended a hand towards the Cardassian.  Yistin, keeping in his tradition with every Starfleet officer to date, did not take Henderson’s hand.  He just stared at him with a blank and cold expression.
“Where is Griffin?”  The Cardassian asked, in a cold voice.
“She’s currently being interrogated for being a hacker.”  Henderson watched his expression.  A flash of anger went through his eyes.  I think Commander Griffin and Glinn Yistin have met, “Shall we get this inspection over with?”  He motioned towards the door into the docking arm.
“Fine.  But I want to ask her a few questions when we are done.”  His cold voice sent a chill down Henderson’s spine.
“I’m sure my security officers would be willing to slip those questions in, while they’re interrogating her,” Henderson offered.  He received a very cold and penetrating look, “Or I can arrange a meeting for when you have completed your inspection.”  He looked satisfied.  How am I going to do that?
They walked inside the door, and waiting for them was Tyson Paine.
“Admiral, I think you should know that someone was in our cargo bay around the time you came aboard.”  He reported, professionally.
“Admiral Henderson, you promised no entry.”  Yistin rounded on him.
“Bridge, this is Admiral Henderson.  Stop all vessels docking or undocking!  Have any vessels left within the last half hour?”  Henderson tapped his combadge and shouted his orders.
“Just the Nathan Hale, sir.”  The voice, it sounded like Captain James, responded.
“Get them back here!”  He was hoping nobody would bring up the Nathan Hale, but there’s nothing he can do now.
“We have no clue where they are, sir.”
“Then send the Wyatt Earp to look for them!  Just get them back!”  He tapped the combadge again to close it off, “Glinn, I will have Starfleet Security look through all of the ships, if you want.”
“No.  If anyone else had taken that document, they would have left as soon as possible.  When this Nathan Hale returns, I will search that ship.  That is assuming we don’t find anything here,” Yistin replied, monotonically, “Now, let’s get on with this investigation.”
They proceeded into the cargo bay of the Cutty Sark.  Admiral Henderson stood near the door, which had two Starbase 334 security officers posted at it, and watched as Yistin and his men searched the crates.  The Ja’rel opened a crate where the bolts of fabric were messed up.  He turned to his superior, and said something in Cardassian.  Yistin walked over, responded something else in their language, and watched the Ja’rel as he began counting the bolts of fabric.
“Admiral, you might want to inform Captain Harrin that he has been robbed six bolts of h’sencar,” Yistin straightened up and walked towards Henderson, glaring at him, “But we did not find the document.”
“Well, if the Cutty Sark is short six bolts of fabric, then perhaps that is why someone came in here.”  Henderson conjectured.
“Six bolts of fabric, Admiral?  Who would steal just six bolts of h’sencar?”  Yistin asked, disbelievingly.
“Maybe a tailor who needed some h’sencar to hold him over.”  Henderson coolly supported his conjection.  Then Henderson’s combadge chirped.
“Admiral Henderson, the Nathan Hale is now in Shuttlebay four.”  Captain James’ voice called out.
“Thank you, Captain.  Have them confined to the vehicle, we will be there as soon as possible.”  Henderson looked to Yistin, about to invite him to Shuttlebay four.
“Already done, sir.  Security will meet you there.  James out.”
“Glinn Yistin, do you want to come to the Shuttlebay?”  Admiral Henderson offered, quite hospitably.
“Yes, Admiral.  I would like to see this Nathan Hale.”  Yistin’s cold voice once again chilled the air.
Henderson, his two security officers, Yistin, and his posse all arrived at Shuttlebay 4.  There were security officers wandering around the cavernous room.  Ahead was a Type-11 looking shuttle, with four officers, dressed in command uniforms, standing in a line beside it, being watched by security.  Henderson led them to this vessel.
“Captain Smith.”  Henderson addressed the man to the right of the center of the line, “This is Glinn Yistin.  He will be searching your ship.”  Smith looked somewhat concerned.
“Admiral, has Starfleet started commissioning shuttlecraft?”  Yistin asked Henderson, examining the Nathan Hale.
“This is a Starfleet Intelligence vessel, Glinn.”  Smith eyed Henderson, somewhat annoyed.
“I see,” Henderson could just hear Yistin forming conclusions in his mind.  Conclusions Henderson did not want Yistin forming, “Well, since it is intelligence we are looking for, and we don’t want you to see.  I will respect the Federation intelligence.  I will have one of this ship’s officers with me.”
“Admiral, you’re not going to let a Cardassian national board a SI vessel, are you?”  Smith blared out, breaking the line.
“Listen, Captain, you heard the Glinn.  He’s going to respect our secrets.  Besides, we have nothing to hide.”  I hope.  Henderson assured him, “In fact, Captain.  I want you to escort him around the Nathan Hale.  Give him your full cooperation.”
“Aye, sir.”  Smith glared at Henderson for a moment, then led the three Cardassians into the shuttle.  Henderson paced around nervously for about fifteen minutes.  He had sent the book off with the Nathan Hale.  It was bound to be on the Nathan Hale.  He kept proposing scenarios in his head, and shooting them down.  The most feasible one he could have come up with is that the book was transported into the emergency transport buffer.  He had hoped that’s what Captain Smith did.  Finally Yistin walked out of the shuttle with Smith.
“Well, Admiral.  Nothing’s here,” Yistin’s statement shocked Henderson, he stood straight up, curious to know what had happened, “I served in the Dominion War.  I know all of the Federation’s tricks.  Store things in the pattern buffer, store the pattern but spread everything else out into space, beam it into the middle of space then come back and get it.  Hide it near the warp core, oh I’ve seen it all, Admiral.  There is no document here, I am sure of that.  In fact, Admiral, since you have been cooperating so much, I am convinced that this book is nowhere near this station.”  Yistin gave Henderson a crooked grin.  Tom couldn’t help but get the impression that Yistin had done something underhanded, there was something wrong with his eyes, “But I still want to interview Ms. Griffin.”  This was the first time Tom noticed Molly was gone.
“Very well, Glinn,” he leaned to the security guards and whispered, “take him to the brig.  And take the scenic route.”  He stood up, smiled at Yistin, who returned the courtesy.  The security officer motioned the Glinn onward, and they left the shuttlebay.”
“Wow, that was fun.”  Smith commented.  Herschell rounded on him.
“Where is the book, and where is Commander Griffin?”  He asked.
“On the Wyatt Earp.  They came looking for us.  When they got to our position, we sent Molly with that book and the English translation of that book on a PADD through the Wyatt Earp’s transporters.  The Nathan Hale doesn’t know a thing.  We figured it would be checked out.  Moreover, we figured that a Cardassian officer might recognize Commander Griffin.  So we sent her with.”  Smith explained.
“Where was the Wyatt Earp headed?”  Henderson let out a breath of relief as he found out that Captain Smith had given the Cardassian military the slip.
“We told them to go to the Zebulon Pike in the most covert way they could.  That way the Ikidar can’t stop them and search them on the way back home.”  Smith had to lower his voice as a couple of security guards walked past.
“Wait, the Zebulon Pike is under orders to not lower their shields.  That way nothing can get aboard.”  Henderson informed Smith.
“Oh, shield harmonics is a funny subject, sir.  If your shield frequency matches another, you can slip right through.”  Smith assured the Admiral.
“Get a hold of the Wyatt Earp and tell them to beam her directly to our brig as soon as they get here.  Leave the book in the possession of Captain Matthews.”  Henderson instructed him.
“Aye, sir.”  Smith headed straight for the Wyatt Earp.  Henderson left the room and proceeded straight to the brig.

Starbase 334 Brig

Tom took the most expeditious route to the Brig as he possibly could.  He was almost worn out when he arrived at the door that led into the entire brig network.  He turned and entered into a long, narrow corridor.  Coming to the first door on the right, he entered the interrogation room.  There was Glinn Yistin, his two assistants, the two security officers Henderson had sent with them, and three others that were keeping the brig.  Also standing there was Molly Griffin in her uniform.
Ah shit.  I didn’t think of that one.  Henderson suddenly realized that he should have had her beamed over in civilian clothing.  He watched as she leaned forward and touched one of the brig-keeper’s combadges.  Then she lowered her arm, and stood straight behind the interrogation desk.
“Excellent,” Yistin said with much satisfaction.  He turned to the other two brig-keepers, who were chatting in a far corner of the room, “Lieutenant, it’s your turn.”  The Admiral watched curiously as the officer strolled over to stand in front of Molly.  Molly looked uncertain, “Go on, Ms. Griffin.”  Yistin egged her on.  She leaned forward, with a sense of apprehension.  It was as if she expected that combadge to blow up as soon as she touched it.  She paused for a second, her finger shaking, a centimeter away from the badge.  Finally she leaned foward and her finger made contact with its surface.  Nothing happened.  Griffin stood there in shock, as her hand fell back to her side.
“Very well, Ms. Griffin,” Yistin’s voice rang with a cold-hearted satisfaction, “Now, tell me.  Did you take that book?”  He leaned in, getting very close to her face, glaring at her all the while.
“I have no clue what you’re talking about, Glinn.”  Molly responded desperately.  She looked like she was on the verge of tears.
“I said: Did you take that book?”  The Glinn raised his voice, shouting in the most despotic format possible.
“I told you,” she cried out, tears beginning to stream down her face, “I don’t know what book you’re talking about.”
“Where is the book?”  The Glinn was yelling even louder now.
She slammed her hands on the table, tears coming out her eyes quite openly, “I don’t know what you’re talking about!”  She collapsed into the chair behind the table, and her head fell into her hands, and sobs could be heard.  Yistin stood up, and looked at Admiral Henderson.  He walked towards the door, his aides and the security detachment assigned to him following him.
“Thank you for letting me question her, Admiral.  I will be returning to Cardassian space now,” he looked back at the pathetic heap sobbing on the table, “Back on Cardassia, impersonating an officer gets the death penalty.”  He looked back, “Have a good day, Admiral.”  He walked out.
“I thought I told you to take the scenic route,” Tom whispered to one of the security officers on the way out.
“I tried.  But he knows the layout of this station too well for me to succeed.”  He left.
Tom turned back towards the room.  As soon as the doors closed, Griffin’s head popped up, the tears no longer coming.  She removed the combadge she was wearing, and one of the two officers who were talking in the corner when the Admiral came in, walked over, removing his and trading it with hers.  Then he and the other officer he conferred with traded, they all put their badges back on.
“Thank you, Lieutenant.  Although, I thought they had us when he wanted me to touch all four combadges in the room.”  Griffin spoke to the lieutenant jg who had just traded with the other security officer.
“We thought so as well, ma’am.  That’s why the ensign and I traded badges over there in the corner.”  He responded, smiling.
“That’s quick thinking, lieutenant.  Makes a good security officer.”  She complimented him.
“Makes a living security officer, ma’am.”  His dry, pointed tone, held no lies.  Commander Griffin laughed.
“Same with intelligence, lieutenant,” she turned to the Admiral as the three brig-keepers left the interrogation room, “How are you doing, Admiral?”
“At the moment, very relieved.  We just gave the entire Cardassian military the slight of hand.  I’m feeling very good.”  He walked over to the chair, and sat.  The stress of the inspection over.
“I know what you mean.  But still, this isn’t the first time I’ve pulled the wool over a foreign organization’s eyes.”  She sat on the table in front of him, Henderson’s combadge chirped.
“Admiral, this is Captain Smith.  The computer reports that Glinn Yistin just downloaded a whole shipload of information off of our mainframe.  The security protocols were essentially hacked.”  Admiral Henderson knew why he got the feeling Yistin was up to something.

to be continued…

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